Another new Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince trailer is out, and it’s surprisingly gruesome. I haven’t read the book in a while, so I guess I’d completely forgotten about the scene where Harry Potter gets ripped in half and smashed against a tree. It’s pretty hard core, and I’m not sure I’d want my kid to be watching this until he’s, I dunno, 29. It’s brutal. And NSFW.
Oh. Shit. Wrong trailer. Nevermind.
So, yeah: Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince. This one is about Tom Riddle, whose all growed up now and he’s got some sort of beef with the universe; he’s probably just pissed off cause he got some bad rhinoplasty. Also, there’s some Harry in it, and some Dumbledore, and clouds with faces, and … hmmm. I think I liked the other trailer better.
Thanks Dustin. Having been subjected to no fewer than five commercials for the "hilarious" roast of Larry the Cable Guy coming soon on Comedy Central while I waited for the Daily Show last night, I really appreciate the cleansing effect of seeing a redneck ripped to shreds.
Posted by: PaddyDog at March 6, 2009 10:36 AM
29? Aw, come on: by the age of 8, I had already seen Predator, Alien, The Shining, and The Exorcist. I still consider them to be some of the scariest movies I've seen.
And I wonder why I'm...different.
WHO SAID THAT????
Posted by: boo at March 6, 2009 10:38 AM
boo>> I had seen Alien and The Shining by the age of 6, so I was two years up on you. Predator wasn't out yet. You were ahead of me on The Exorcist, though.
Posted by: DarthCorleone at March 6, 2009 10:41 AM
Darth, do I sense a "Who's More Fucked Up?" Challenge?? HMMMM???
Posted by: boo at March 6, 2009 10:47 AM
I hate both of you now, DarthCorleon and boo. You lazy bastards don't know what it's like to have to beg your parents to see something R rated. Fortunately, they stopped one day.
(That's a lie, they waited forever with me, and as soon as I could see whatever I wanted, my brother, who is two years younger than me, got to see whatever he wanted too.)
I do pity boo for all those commercials thought. It's like they've been trying to find the most unlikable person to roast for years, and the moment they do, they go out of there way to not make it funny. I'm looking at you Pamela Anderson, modern day Flavor Flav, and the death kneel of all that is funny, Bob Saget.
Posted by: George at March 6, 2009 10:51 AM
Although not as scary as Alien, my daughter saw Pitch Black at age three. One of my more brain farty parenting moments.
Thanks for the trailer Dustin, now I really have no idea what's going on.
Posted by: admin at March 6, 2009 11:01 AM
Ooooh, fucked up challenge! Poltergeist was my favorite movie at age 5, and by age seven (I think) I had seen Aliens, Terminator, Rosemary's Baby, Jaws, The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, and The Fly, to name a few.
I spent ages 11-14 having sleepovers at my friend Laine's, where her mother would let us rent whatever the hell we wanted...The People Under the Stairs, The Mangler, any stupid horror movie we wanted. Her mother also encouraged us to skinny dip and introduced me to the concept of a woman enjoying giving a blow job...we were watching Legends of the Fall (HATE) and she said, regarding Brad Pitt, "I would blow him till his ears popped."
I was shocked into silence. And then I laughed. I think that was the beginning of the Julie of Today.
Posted by: Julie at March 6, 2009 11:01 AM
Jules, that's not fucked up babe. That is *sniff*...beautiful.
Posted by: boo at March 6, 2009 11:10 AM
I refuse to see this mess. The fifth movie was so butt awful, and they've kept that same incompetent director on board this time around. Somebody shoot him and pretend it was an accident, please.
Posted by: Lucas at March 6, 2009 11:11 AM
I only watched gonzo hermaphroditic midget pornography until the age of 15, when I started watching Lifetime movies exclusively.
Posted by: TK at March 6, 2009 11:11 AM
I have vivid memories of the rape scene of "Death Wish" at 4 years of age. I love my parents, and think they made good parenting choices 99% of the time, but not when it came to taking us with them to movies to save money on babysitters.
Oh yeah, and The Exorcist at about the same time. I wasn't as disturbed by that movie because I curled up in the seat and fell asleep about 15 minutes in.
Posted by: krix at March 6, 2009 11:14 AM
I'm not sure if I would let any child of mine (note: I don't have any yet) watch or read Harry Potter 3-7 until they were at least 12 years old. I was one of those children who was allowed to watch scary movies and read horror novels at a young age. Read The Shining at age 8 and started on horror movies with House and House II (shut up, they were scary at the time) at age 6. I forgot what movies I watched between the ages of 6 and 10, but I remember Birds scared the shit out of me at ago 10 and It (the book) gave me nightmares. That really explains a lot about me and the fact that I fully expect the Boogieman to leap out of my closet on any given night. I'm not sure I want my kids to turn out like me.
But if they're going to be anything like my husband was growing up, a neighborhood hoodlum and smart-ass, then....maybe they deserve to have the shit scared out of them so they'll stay inside at night.
I think that was the beginning of the Julie of Today.
Then that woman deserves a medal. Of platinum. Filled with chocolate.
Since it has been raised: My childhood (and that of my generation in the family) was pretty much peppered with stuff we shouldn't be seeing. We regularly discussed the latest Elm Street movie, my dad got me copies of Robocop and Total Recall (tri-boobs!) that got played over and over again, and New Jack City introduced me to the concept of crackheads, crack workers in underwear to prevent stealing, and Wesley Snipes (which caused my lifelong distrust of him).
Oh and my dad thought it wise to let me listen to his collection of bawdy songs. I never realized how bad this was until freshman year, when my then-roommate (who introduced me to Eminem and Tnsane Clown Posse, to my utter hatred) recoiled in horror when he heard "Strokin'" by Clarence Carter.
I do believe this is why I am a lover and not a fighter to this very day. Except I am not exactly loving any either.
I never realized how bad this was until freshman year, when my then-roommate (who introduced me to Eminem and Tnsane Clown Posse, to my utter hatred) recoiled in horror when he heard "Strokin'" by Clarence Carter.
??? I thought that song was about being a really good pet owner!
Posted by: Julie at March 6, 2009 11:26 AM
Dude. As long as we're talking about songs that are old and whatthefucky and seriously disconcerting, then I have to submit "Aqualung".
*shiver*
And I was never scared of movies like Predator or Alien. The Exorcist, however, ruined my shit.
Posted by: Clee Shay at March 6, 2009 11:49 AM
Clee, Alien didn't scare you? What are you, a cyborg?
Posted by: boo at March 6, 2009 12:02 PM
On second thought, you probably just lack the muscle that makes assholes pucker. That muscle is very important for communicating terror to the brain. Don't worry; it's not your fault.
Posted by: boo at March 6, 2009 12:03 PM
Based on these comments I am starting to rethink my policy on letting my kids watch scary movies. And, Julie, you need to stay the fuck away from my daughter (really anyone's daughter). And even farther away from my son.
My first scary movie was Jaws when I was about 9. Pretty tame right? Not even R rated. Still, when the severed head popped out from the hole in the boat I jumped about 2 feet off my seat. Then I saw Dracula (w/Frank Langella) and couldn't sleep for a week. That's right, the 70's- a simpler time when Nixon with fangs was a sex symbol.
Posted by: ed newman at March 6, 2009 12:08 PM
But if they're going to be anything like my husband was growing up, a neighborhood hoodlum and smart-ass, then....maybe they deserve to have the shit scared out of them so they'll stay inside at night.
This is a good parenting technique. I sat my kids down a couple of years ago and had them watch Alien, only I told them it was a documentary. Upon conmclusion of the movie I stated that I knew where they were keeping some of those specimens and if they ever misbehaved.....
Lets just say I have very well behaved kids.
Posted by: admin at March 6, 2009 12:21 PM
But kids are scared of very different things than adults. My kid was scared spitless of Jurassic Park, yet she watched tons of scary movies without so much as a goosebump.
Posted by: Wednesday at March 6, 2009 12:28 PM
I love you admin.
Posted by: Smokin at March 6, 2009 12:28 PM
Admin, I am stealing your idea when I have children. That is beyond awesome.
None of you are worse parents than me. I took my kids to see Madagascar 2.
I know, I know. There's a special place in hell...
Posted by: eloosie at March 6, 2009 12:34 PM
None of you are worse parents than me. I took my kids to see Madagascar 2.
I know, I know. There's a special place in hell...
Posted by: eloosie at March 6, 2009 12:34 PM
I loved the trailer for Harry Potter: Deliverance.
I am old enough to remember seeing the original Fly. (On TV of course.) The Exorcist fucked up my shit. There was a movie called Terror Island, with these weird turtle like things. And then there's Day of the The Triffids, which, to this day, still makes me distrust Asparagus.
And while I was over 30 when I saw it, Se7en reduced me to a quivering childlike mess. Does that count?
Posted by: Odnon at March 6, 2009 1:21 PM
My parents never let me see anything R-rated, but my mom LOVED old Twilight Zones and let me watch those. You want to seriously mess up a kid? Find some of those babies. I still can't use a slot machine because one came to life in that show.
I need to send my mom a thank-you card.
Posted by: idgiepug at March 6, 2009 1:40 PM
Don't worry Ed, I shield the children from my defilerays :)
Posted by: Julie at March 6, 2009 1:52 PM
I'm sorry, much as I love you Julie, I can't take the chance. My children will be protected by a Cone of Silence and full body condoms whenever we pass through Pennsylvania, just to be sure.
Posted by: ed newman at March 6, 2009 3:33 PM
HA! What if I wear a muzzle and wrap myself in tinfoil?
Posted by: Julie at March 6, 2009 4:04 PM
Bow chicka wow-wow....
Posted by: admin at March 6, 2009 4:07 PM
Odnon, I remember those weird turtle-like things! They scared the shit out of me when I was about 6 or 7--I believe I spent a large part of the movie peeking out from behind a pillow. We didn't normally get to watch scary movies at that age, but Mom was out and my younger sister really wanted to watch it, so Dad let us. I don't think Mom was too happy about it when she got home.
Posted by: ariadne at March 6, 2009 4:52 PM
ariadne we'll have to form a support group. Although I am thrilled that someone else remembers those Slimy Turtle Bastards. It wasn't all just a dream...
Posted by: Odnon at March 6, 2009 5:18 PM
I remember watching The Incredible Shrinking Man on TV and being scared spitless when the man shrinks so small that the spider could reach out a leg and smash him. That remains a disturbing memory.
And while I didn't see Twilight Zone as a kid, I remember Rod Serling's Night Gallery. It was kinda like Twilight Zone revisited in the 70's and it had some creepy images and themes. I remember one episode about a man who was slowly turned into a slug.
Posted by: rlr260 at March 6, 2009 5:49 PM
I think the movie that scared me the most as a kid was Food of the Gods. My father, bless his little peapicking heart, is a B-movie aficionado, and subjected me to many of them as a child. But Food of the Gods...holy crap, I still have nightmares about that shit.
Posted by: Smokin at March 6, 2009 5:52 PM
Trilogy of Terror (TV movie) did it for me-the scene of Karen Black calling up her mom to invite her over and then getting the carving knife, well that was just all sorts of wrong. The other 2 stories weren't bad either.
Posted by: MadMike at March 7, 2009 9:31 PM
MadMike: Trilogy of Terror. Yes! I've been thinking of that one. A classic!
Posted by: Odnon at March 9, 2009 2:51 PM
Spielberg and Lucas got away with a lot during the late '70s-early '80s as far as gore/PG ratings were concerned.
The fucking guy in Poltergeist tore his face off, for fuck's sake. PG.
This discussion probably appeared at a previous time on this site, though.
Posted by: Recondite at March 9, 2009 3:49 PM
Love it very much . Lots of my online friends on mixedmate dotcom love it too. You can share your ideas with them if you want.
Thanks Dustin. Having been subjected to no fewer than five commercials for the "hilarious" roast of Larry the Cable Guy coming soon on Comedy Central while I waited for the Daily Show last night, I really appreciate the cleansing effect of seeing a redneck ripped to shreds.