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Green Lantern Trailer: In Brightest Day, In Blackest Night, No Gaudy Bright Lime-Green Light Shall Escape My Sight

By Dustin Rowles | Posted Under Trailers | Comments (27)

greenlantern2.jpg

Look, folks. When the first long trailer for Green Lantern came out last month, I might have said some things that I regret. About the types of people who might be interested in a movie that looks like the one being advertised. I shouldn’t have taken my disappointment out with the geeks. It was uncalled for. From now on, I will restrict my comments about Green Lantern marketing to Green Lantern and not the people excited about seeing it.

Which brings us to the second Green Lantern trailer, and good news, folks! Either it’s only half as dumb as the previous one, or I’ve lost half of my intelligence since April. The truth is, I just don’t like the way it looks. It looks like a live-action CGI-hybrid, which I suppose it is technically. But it looks like a cartoon. Actually, it looks Ace Ventura’s Mask turned superhero. Kilowog’s voice? It just doesn’t suit the character. And even with only glimpses of some of the alien characters, it looks like one of those talking animal movies where the voice doesn’t sync with the lips, like they just gave Kilowog some peanut butter and dubbed a voice over his mouth moving. Like Mr. Ed.

I will say this for the trailer: Peter Sarsgaard’s Hector Hammond looks like the meanest motherfucking 70’s porn star on the planet. He looks like Ron Jeremy with Macrocephaly. And the screen shot above? What’s up with that? It looks like the Riddler in green. I don’t buy Ryan Reynolds as a superhero. I’m sorry. I think the guy is great. And beard-y Reynolds could be a great super-villian, but he just doesn’t have the weight to carry off a superhero roles. He’s the kind of guy that, no matter what he says or how he says it, there feels like there’s a note of sarcasm in what he’s saying. That doesn’t work for earnest superheroes.

Mostly, though: It looks like someone just puked neon green all over the screen.

Honestly, I’m not trying to be an asshole about this. Even if the script works out, and Ryan Reynolds pulls through, I just don’t think that — visually — it looks like it will hold up, which is probably why they devoted another $9 million in special effects to the film a month before its release. I will hang on to a shred of optimism that it looks better on the big screen, but I have my doubts.









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Comments

Everything but the neon green nipples, huh?

Posted by: bleujayone at May 4, 2011 7:52 PM

Not gonna lie, I'll be seeing this movie for Pink Mark Strong.

Posted by: Kelly Anne at May 4, 2011 7:58 PM

Why don't they just make this a fully animated movie? Why bother with actors for these things?

Posted by: greer at May 4, 2011 8:06 PM

I missed the earlier referenced Green Lantern post, but this is without a doubt the most negativity I have ever read expressed by one Dustin Rowles toward Ryan Reynolds. It's really rather staggering.

As for peanut butter in the animal mouths, I enjoyed joking that the black cat on that Melissa Joan Hart witch show was a real cat with peanut butter in its mouth instead of a puppet.

Posted by: DarthCorleone at May 4, 2011 8:21 PM

You know how on South Park they will sometimes use a cut-out photo of the face of an actual person like David Hassellhoff or Mel Gibson and paste it onto the cartoon character's body as it moves across the cartoon background?

That's what this movie looks like.

Posted by: The Mutt at May 4, 2011 8:39 PM

Why don't they just make this a fully animated movie? Why bother with actors for these things?

Greer - They did. It was called "Green Lantern: First Flight" and was a DVD release. It was solid, IMHO. Good, but not GREAT.

Posted by: Green Lantern at May 4, 2011 8:49 PM

Okay. Just watched the trailer.

Woo. I have a few reservations still...not the least of which is Blake Lively...but still. Woo.

I have to excuse myself now and go, um, "polish my ring". Yeah...

Posted by: Green Lantern at May 4, 2011 8:53 PM

Don't worry, Dustin, we good. I've always been with you on the Green Lantern-in-specific non-sense. Unfortunately, I can't see the trailer. A little robot is telling me, "Sorry but this video is no longer available" and the little robot is making a sadface. Like this:

:(

If it's anything like me, it's sad about the video and its poor grammar.

Posted by: RobP at May 4, 2011 9:11 PM

His eyes ... dear Godtopus, WHAT IS WRONG WITH HIS EYES???

Posted by: Darcy at May 4, 2011 9:14 PM

What, what? It's working? No time to be sad now, little robot, time to watch!

:watches:

Enh. It should've been animated.

Posted by: RobP at May 4, 2011 9:16 PM

Wow. Just. Wow. Dude, give the guy a break. It looks like generic superhero movie content and I plan to see it.

I haven't read your posting on Transformers: Dark of the Butt but I certainly hope it was at least ten times more hate-riddled than this.


Posted by: Johnnyboy at May 4, 2011 9:32 PM

It's shots like Ryan bouncing across the floor at 01:13 that are pushing me away. It's just . . . terribly fake. Cheap. There's no weight to their movements.

Posted by: Lauren at May 4, 2011 9:47 PM

Besides

Who.

Fucking.

Cares?

That just looks awful.

Posted by: , at May 5, 2011 12:57 AM

Somebody coined the phrase "uncanny valley" to describe when animated characters looked too human for comfort. There needs to be a phrase to describe when a "live action" movie becomes so much of a cartoon that the actors are little more than a voice, a mouth and a name on a poster.

Clutch Cargo?

Posted by: The Mutt at May 5, 2011 1:40 AM

The domino mask is BY FAR the worst part. I just don't understand where somebody thought that was a good idea. I mean, you try it out, it looks ridic (see above) and you move along, mask-less. I'm embarrassed for them, honestly, that they allowed a product to go out with eyes like THAT.

Posted by: The Wandering Parakeet at May 5, 2011 2:07 AM

What. The. Actual. Fuck.

I'm sorry, but that just looks ridiculous.
Mark Strong, I love you, but even I cannot take you seriously while you look like that. And Peter Sarsgaard? Honey, what did you ever do to them that they would make you look like that?

No. Just no.

Posted by: Vanessa at May 5, 2011 5:07 AM

In the picture, the mask makes RR look like one of those guys who needs a pair of glasses to magnify his eyes and make his face look proportional. I would actually like to play around with photoshopping different glasses onto that picture and see if I can make it better.

Glasses on the docket:
*Dumbledore specs
*John Lennon glasses
*Aviator goggles
*Far Side/50's Librarian black winged plastic frames
*Black plastic hipster glasses
*Rec Specs
*Aviators

Posted by: StoatCat at May 5, 2011 9:02 AM

Look on the bright side: if the Academy Awards decide films like The Green Lantern meet the minimum threshold for animation, we will never face another year with only three nominees in Best Animated Feature again. I mean, if Stuart Little made the short list, surely Green Lantern will.

Posted by: Robert at May 5, 2011 9:22 AM

Yeah this looks lame but the guy has a magic ring for gods sake what did you expect?

Posted by: logan at May 5, 2011 9:51 AM

I'm with you for once, DR--yes, it can happen-- I just don't buy RyRy as a super hero. He looks like an idiot frat brother in a sparkly costume.

This whole thing looks awful.

Posted by: Figgy at May 5, 2011 10:28 AM

They could have filmed an Elton John biopic at the same time.

Posted by: , at May 5, 2011 10:38 AM

This movie looks like shit. I mean, seriously. It looks terrible, but I actually like that RyRey is kinda sarcastic. It's almost as if he knew this movie is ridiculous.

Posted by: Sofia at May 5, 2011 12:15 PM

Wait, pink Mark Strong's name is Sinestro and he isn't the bad guy? Are they already foreshadowing a sequel that they will never make?

Posted by: Anne At Large at May 5, 2011 12:32 PM

RR shud have been The Flash instead of robbing this role from Nathan Fillion.

Also, Blake Lively makes me wanna hurl puppies at the sun.

This movie is gonna blow n we'll get another "re-imagining" like Spidey next year. i hope they'll get Fillion on Round Two.

Posted by: haplo at May 5, 2011 1:23 PM

i like that other trailer i saw here but this does indeed look awful. ugh.

Posted by: splinter at May 5, 2011 6:02 PM

Sorry, guys, but I just don't see it. I don't see why I'm supposed to think this looks like crap. It's just a superhero movie -- and it seems like it could actually be kinda cool.

That screencap on top does look awful though.

Posted by: Thijs at May 6, 2011 2:12 AM

I defy anyone to compare the 'official' Greenlantern trailer with the fanmade Fillion one and not see how this movie is going to be utter shite.

Posted by: Stella at May 7, 2011 10:54 AM