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Cowboys And Aliens Trailer: You See Us Coming And You Altogether Run For Cover

By TK | Posted Under Trailers | Comments (55)

cowboys-and-aliens-movie-trailer-daniel-craig.png

Fuck superheroes.

This year will likely debut a pile of superhero movies. Thor, Captain America, X-Men: First Class. All of them look interesting. All of them look like fun.

And you know what? Jon Favreau’s Cowboys And Aliens is beginning to look like the cream of the summer blockbuster crop. The first trailer looked like fun. The new trailer looks like the fucking balls. Based on the 2006 graphic novel, it’s about… well, cowboys and aliens. It’s the simplest of plots. It’s got a beast of a cast — Daniel Craig, Harrison Ford, Sam Rockwell, Olivia Wilde, Clancy Brown, Paul Dano, Keith Carradine, Adam Beach, and Walton Goggins.

Watch the trailer.

I don’t know if anyone can do steely-eyed badass quite like Daniel Craig, and Harrison Ford looks more alive than he has in years. When we posted the first trailer, I said that I don’t know if it’ll be a great movie, but it sure as hell is a great trailer. That holds true here as well. I like that there’s still no shots of the actual aliens, and only fleeting glimpses of the ships. That they use those weird tethers to kidnap people, instead of beams of light or some such? I kind of like it.

Honestly? I kind of like everything I’m seeing.

Only one question remains: Will Sam Rockwell dance?









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Comments

Only one question remains: Will Sam Rockwell dance?

He'd better. Or I'm going to pee on my theatre seat in protest.

Posted by: Lauren at April 14, 2011 10:16 PM

The premise intrigued me, the cast made it more interesting and the trailers threw their weird tethers around my scrotum and drew me into an urgent need to see this.
I have the same anticipation for "Cowboys & Aliens" that I had for "Zombieland".

Posted by: Spender at April 14, 2011 10:16 PM

Hee, Thirteen is awful in everything. Well in 'Tron' she was supposed to be robotic/synthetic whatever.

Looks fun and that shirtless Craig scene looks sexy and very BLUE.

Posted by: kilmo at April 14, 2011 10:21 PM

WE'RE THE COWBOYS FROM HELL!

I hope that is the closing credits song for this... I'm going into this movie assuming it will be awesome... almost guaranteeing that any other film of the summer won't share that sentiment... except Harry Potter... but thats it, no more backtracking

Posted by: protoformX at April 14, 2011 10:31 PM

YESSSSSS...

That's the only comment I have at the moment.

Posted by: Melody at April 14, 2011 10:46 PM

i am geep's raging hard-on.

Posted by: gp at April 15, 2011 12:17 AM

God's Hooks... clearly I have strayed into the wrong online community.

Excitement over this tripe? Wipe the drool from your no-doubt open mouths.

If I were required to refute the cultural validity of this cinematic abortion with but one sentence, it would be this:

"Daniel Craig's so-called sex-appeal has faded to that of the pathetically sobbing 80-year-old man whose wife is hung at the end of The Crucible (1996, starring Daniel Day-Lewis and Ken Cheeseman) (I will not apologize for vague references on a site that purports to cater to some sort of intellectual elite), as evidenced by the frame found at 1:45 in the trailer, which clearly shows an emaciated old man in -- how appropriate -- old-man pants, enlisting some fine young lass in the task of finding the shirt that his dementia has no doubt led him to misplace."

Having said that, there are not -- as far as I know -- any official restraints placed on the length of my complaint, so I will go on.

Harrison Ford? Alive, you say?

That man hasn't been even remotely alive since 1998's Six Days Seven Nights (during the filming of which it is rumoured he planted the seeds that would later lead Anne Heche back to heterosexuality).

As for this Megan Fox character, she simply can't pull off the role of "intelligent woman." My God, but that girl is only good for but one thing!

Sam Rockwell (yes, I am aware of the near godlike status he has attained on this fine site through his oft lauded ability to dance ) needs to go back where he came from, by the way (I, for one, would have let him die in that all-terrain vehicle from 2009's Moon). Perhaps some day the general pubic will evolve past the schoolyard erection and actually appreciate someone with some legitimate acting skill.

Good Lord, people. something is gravely lacking in your taste if this piece of offal is the prime ticket of your upcoming summer of cinema.

I for one, will save my money for a worthwhile feature.

Posted by: Daventhal at April 15, 2011 12:44 AM

Gak! I can't wait. Looks like all kinds of awesomeness.

Posted by: koj at April 15, 2011 12:52 AM

so you hated the trailer Daventhal?

Too bad Olivia is back to corncob up my ass mode again. she surprised me in Tron.

Wish Daniel had different hair though. all i see is Bond...in a cowboy hat.

Posted by: haplo at April 15, 2011 1:06 AM

Daventhal,

Far be it for me to get in the way of a good rant, but I must protest a few things:

1. That's not Megan Fox. When ranting, it's important to get it right.

2. You may not like Sam Rockwell, or his dancing, and you're entitled to that opinion, but I think you'll find that you're in a minority in saying he can't act. Sam Rockwell paraphrases Steven Seagal: "I also dance."

Posted by: MM at April 15, 2011 1:12 AM

Hee, Thirteen is awful in everything.
---
YOU BITE YOUR FUCKING TONGUE!

Posted by: , at April 15, 2011 1:52 AM

@,
I'll give you "The O.C." nobody comes off bad when Marissa Cooper is around. Oh Marissa when she became a faux-lesbian and tried to be poor 'cause her mom was badass. No one cried when you died.

Posted by: kilmo at April 15, 2011 2:18 AM

Did you seriously just quote Pantera, TK. This better be good.

Posted by: DeistBrawler at April 15, 2011 2:38 AM

MM,

Far be it from me to get in the way of a good critique of a rant, but I beg to differ on both of your well-made but, nevertheless, erroneous points.

1. Whatever IMDB or other such cinematical authorities might say, that is, I assure you, Megan Fox. If this is a factual falsity, I assure you, it is a figurative truth.

2. I may be in the "minority," but I would thank you to not judge me for this.

Posted by: Daventhal at April 15, 2011 2:48 AM

I followed your cut, Daventhal. Very intellectual.

Posted by: Jenne Frisby at April 15, 2011 3:04 AM

Thanks TK for reminding me how well Daniel Craig fills out that cowboy outfit.

As for 'Cowboys & Aliens', this has piqued my interest but I've been burned too many times to get crazy excited for August at this point.

Posted by: Teresa at April 15, 2011 4:02 AM

Ah, yes. Well done Daventhal. I do so enjoy the I DISLIKE SOMETHING THAT YOU LIKE AND THEREFORE I AM RIGHT AND YOU ARE WRONG comments.

Posted by: The Other Agent Johnson at April 15, 2011 7:13 AM

Masturbate to recordings of your own voice much, Daventhal?

Posted by: nrvs at April 15, 2011 8:27 AM

God damn it do I love how this site reps Pantera lyrics. Good show.

Posted by: DangadaDang at April 15, 2011 8:59 AM

"I for one, will save my money for a worthwhile feature."

I don't think it's possible to read this sentence and not think of it being delivered by some Bob Dobbs lookalike preaching to his kids.

Posted by: nrvs at April 15, 2011 9:06 AM

Daniel Craig looks good as a Cowboy especially from the back! I may see this not because of him but because it looks entertaining.

Posted by: Dingle Berry at April 15, 2011 9:11 AM

::composes self::

Daniel Craig can loosen my stays any time.

Posted by: Mrs. Julien at April 15, 2011 9:18 AM

The name of this movie almost made me puke. I HATE anachronistic cross-genre films. All I could imagine was something like Wild Wild West, which I don't think involved aliens, but involved some absurd futuristic mechanical devices in the old west. Then, I watched this trailer.

Despite the telegraphed plot-by-numbers elements that have been done a thousand times before, this actually looks very entertaining. I can't believe I really want to see this. If I say out loud, "I want to see Cowboys & Aliens" I physically recoil. Yet, it is true; I do.

Posted by: Hoof Hearted at April 15, 2011 9:19 AM

"Masturbate to recordings of your own voice much, Daventhal?"
Posted by: nrvs at April 15, 2011 8:27 AM

Believe it or not, an audio recording is not necessary for release. The simple pleasure of seeing my text on a screen is enough to drive me to take up my flimsy shaft in sexual fury.

This pleasure, however, pales in comparison to the one that assaults me with unmatched vigour when other people take the time to type out my name or otherwise acknowledge my existence.

Also, your assessment of my appearance was quite astute in its accuracy. I do bear more than a passing resemblance to Bob Dobbs. I shall now sit in my armchair and quietly let your compliments sink in.

Posted by: Daventhal at April 15, 2011 9:46 AM

I would thank you to not judge me for this.

Judge not, lest ye be judged. Since your entire rant was prompted by what you perceive as our lack of taste, we are fully justified in noting that your opinion is simply that, with no more weight than I would give to the crazy preacher in the park. But as in both cases it seems to satisfy some deep-seated need to feel important, carry on. It harms none.

On the other hand, your ageist ramblings about how older men cannot be sexy are simply untrue. Think it, if you will, but not all of us seek fickle youths to lavish with admiration and desire.

Posted by: Reba at April 15, 2011 10:38 AM

The new trailer looks like the fucking balls.

So, wait, "balls" is a good thing now? I thought it was a bad thing.

Posted by: Todd at April 15, 2011 10:39 AM

Hmm...Clu seems to have succeeded in getting a program out of The Grid and its name is Daventhal.

Posted by: TylerDFC at April 15, 2011 10:40 AM

Todd, sorry - that might be a regional thing. Around these parts, "balls" as an exclamation is a negative. Example:

"Daventhal is trolling again? Aw, balls."

On the other hand, describing something as "the balls" is a positive. Example:

"Reba's witty, intelligent response? That was the balls."

Hope that helps.

Posted by: TK at April 15, 2011 10:46 AM

I didn't even know Sam Rockwell was in this. I would have probably seen this anyway but that definitely cinches it.

TK, Much love for the Pantera quote.

Davenballs,
I will not apologize for vague references on a site that purports to cater to some sort of intellectual elite

That was condescending and rather pedantic. Welcome to Pajiba. You'll fit in just fine. But the stick needs to loosen juuust a smidge.

Posted by: Paultera at April 15, 2011 11:00 AM

OK, so "balls" is a bad thing, but "the balls" is a good thing?

Is it like the difference between saying "I'ts a bomb!" vs. "It's the bomb?"

That said, this movie just looks like a mess. And I can't get over the "assless chaps" effect. It kinda drowns out everything else in the movie, even nekkid whoever the hell she is.

Posted by: BWeaves at April 15, 2011 11:03 AM

I have a few things to get off of my chest in light of the recent unprovoked aggression that has been coming my way.

1st, Reba, while I loved your television program even more than I loved your work in Tremors, but I do have to take issue with your comment. Please do not waste your breath pointing out my hypocrisy. True hypocrites never acknowledge their crimes. Also, in the words of Abraham Lincoln, "Do as I say, not as I do."

Todd, while I respect your distaste for me and my opinions, I object to the term "trolling." That particular term is overused and under-defined. In fact, I accuse you of trolling since your criticism of me only differs from my criticism of this foul film in that you happen to be happily on the bandwagon.

Finally, Paultera, while I may consider "Davenballs" a viable alternative to my current moniker, I will not be loosening any sticks. To be honest, I've been meticulously inserting more while you've had your back turned.

Posted by: Daventhal at April 15, 2011 11:46 AM

I have discovered at least one grammatical error in my most recent communique. No doubt it was inserted by some ill-tempered administrator in an attempt to subvert my legitimacy.

Posted by: Daventhal at April 15, 2011 11:48 AM

Oh, my dear, you need no help in subversion! You've done a bang up job on your own. Still, one does appreciate a fresh voice, however misguided.

Posted by: Reba at April 15, 2011 11:52 AM

I've taken a walk to clear my mind and am now willing to grant the following concession: Harrison Ford does appear somewhat spry.

I crave your acceptance, Pajiba. I crave it. I shall learn to dance like Sam Rockwell, quote Pantera like TK, and return anew.

Posted by: Daventhal at April 15, 2011 12:44 PM

BWeaves, "balls" is like "fuck" - inherently neither good nor evil, but dependent on tone, inflection and demeanor.

Also, there can be no "assless chaps". Chaps by definition have no ass.

Posted by: Skarl the Drummer at April 15, 2011 12:50 PM

Daventhal, have you checked out Pajiba Love? Your pretentious brand of whimsy would fit right in.

Posted by: snapnhiss at April 15, 2011 1:35 PM

Todd, while I respect your distaste for me and my opinions, I object to the term "trolling." That particular term is overused and under-defined. In fact, I accuse you of trolling since your criticism of me only differs from my criticism of this foul film in that you happen to be happily on the bandwagon.

Uh, I didn't say anything like that. I just asked about balls. As one does.

Posted by: Todd at April 15, 2011 3:04 PM

Todd

By god, you're right. It was TK that labelled me a troll.

Extreme, passport-based stresses unrelated to this comment thread have driven me to dementia. Your ball-based curiosity is certainly understandable.

Posted by: Daventhal at April 15, 2011 3:36 PM

Guys, let's keep Devanthal. I'm sure I disagree somehow as Olivia Wilde is a very sexy woman and is a very not Megan Fox, but I like how he's talking to us. Now, I'm going to go shave something weird into my beard but I'll meet you all in the study.

The fire better be simmering when I get there.

Posted by: coryo at April 15, 2011 4:05 PM

Coryo, darling, fires don't simmer. It needs a liquid to effect that. They do, however, smolder, roar, sputter, glow, and crackle. Pray pick one, and I shall endeavor to see that the conflagration pleases you when you arrive. Be so kind as to announce yourself and give me a moment to assure the fires cooperation, won't you?

I do agree that Ms. Wilde is not Ms. Fox, although if they decided to unite, they could be the Wilde-Foxes, and that would be a rather pleasing moniker. I am sure you gentlemen could find something in their union to amuse you, as well. And while I do see the distinction, I am afraid that Daventhal has somewhat of a point (albeit a thin one) that Ms. Wilde, through direction or happenstance, has a particularly Megan Fox-like look about her in that one scene. Let us hope they rectify the situation before the final cut, hmmm?

Posted by: Reba at April 15, 2011 5:05 PM

Whoops, embarrassing. Pray forgive me my lapse. I've been speaking a bit too much Spanish of late.

And I think the thing those two have most in common is an uncommonly angular facial layout.

Posted by: coryo at April 15, 2011 5:17 PM

Devanthal - you sound like a dick, but you're pretty funny. i say we keep him.

Posted by: carolyn at April 15, 2011 5:24 PM

Pajiba, Scathing Reviews for Bitchy People. I think Devanthal fits right. Besides, I keep misreading his name is Neanderthal, for no apparent reason.

Posted by: BWeaves at April 15, 2011 5:32 PM

Also, there can be no "assless chaps". Chaps by definition have no ass.

Posted by: Skarl the Drummer at April 15, 2011 12:50 PM

Yes, that's my point. He's wearing pants, but he looks like he isn't because they keep enhancing the butt crack effect of the back seam. I can't take my eyes off it.

Posted by: BWeaves at April 15, 2011 5:35 PM

So, in other words, he has not assless chaps, but a chaps-less ass??

Posted by: HandyMan at April 15, 2011 10:40 PM

Daventhal writes like a romance-novel aristocrat, and has possibly the most annoying gimmick I have ever seen. Bravo, I guess that is an achievement of sorts

Posted by: Douchebag McGee at April 16, 2011 7:50 AM

If my tone so offends your tender sensibilities, I would recommend skimming or -- better yet -- skipping my contributions. However much I am involved in the composition of my comments, I refuse to accept responsibility for you taking the time to read them. I'm sure there are comments more in line with your point of view, gimmicks that appeal rather than repel. I wish you luck in finding them.

Having said that, I don't think you'll have to worry too much about encountering me in the future. My foray in to the world of the Pajiban discussion has left me with something of a bad taste in my mouth. While I've acknowledged all of your rights to disagree with me, I'm a little discouraged that not even one person picked up on what I had thought was fairly obvious tongue-in-cheek sarcasm.

Harrison Ford did not peak in Six Days, Seven Nights.

I know what Megan Fox looks like.

That trailer does, in fact, look like the balls.

Please enjoy my absence, and if I do return to comment again, I will be sure to keep my opinions happily in line with the consensus of the day. I would hate to be the cause of future grouching.

With lust,

Davenballs

Posted by: Daventhal at April 16, 2011 6:03 PM

i am geep's raging hard-on.

Me too. This movie looks AWESOME.

@Daventhal's Balls, Are you secretly Pookie?

I ::heart:: Pookie.

Posted by: Anna von Beav at April 16, 2011 6:33 PM

"GET OFF MY PLAIN!"

Posted by: Bon at April 16, 2011 7:37 PM

And just like that, as mysteriously as he arrived, he was gone.

Posted by: jiffeylube at April 16, 2011 9:49 PM

Looks fun, you all remember what fun is right? Doesn't have to be epic, just a hoot.

Posted by: TrickyHD at April 16, 2011 9:59 PM

Oh, dear, Daventhal you appear to be having a case of the vapors. I did recognize the tongue in cheek nature of your comment, as I could imagine no other reason to write in this particular outdated style. It was simply too tempting to counter you with same. If you really expected impassioned discourse, you'd have been better served to pick a less archaic approach. We will happily argue about the attraction (or not) of various celebrities (for instance, I cannot fathom the lust for Cillian Murphy), but if you give us a new toy, it is foolish to believe we will not pick it up and hit you over the head with it.

Posted by: Reba at April 16, 2011 10:54 PM

I actually "know" someone at a large forum that writes just like Daventhal, to the point that he makes Charles Dickens seem light and breezy reading. It's rather tedious having to wade through what they consider high art in sentence structure.

Posted by: snapnhiss at April 17, 2011 7:37 AM

I'm pretty sure I resemble that remark Snaphiss.

Posted by: Mrs. Julien at April 17, 2011 5:07 PM

Yeah, but it's charming when you do it, Mrs. J.

Posted by: The Other Agent Johnson at April 17, 2011 6:36 PM