Pajiba

The presence of Gary Oldman always places a movie solidly in the category of "Stuff I'm Going to See Even If I Don't Actually Want To."

Isn't someone already making The Road?

Why does that trailer look so much more grim than the one for The Road?

Seriously, this looks at least somewhat apocalyptic. The Road looks like it was filmed on a cloudy day in the Midwest.

Which, admittedly, does make you want to go Mad Max on everything.

Badass Mila Kunis, Badass Denzel Washington, Badass hairless kitty, Badass Gary Oldman. I am firmly wedged underneath my desk right now. Hopefully the teacher doesn't ask me to come up to the blackboard to answer a question.

(For the kids out there, a blackboard was a communication tool that teachers used to demonstrate different problems or notations to students. It was written on with something called "chalk" which was made from an animal that is now extinct due to over harvesting.)

(For the kids out there, a blackboard was a communication tool that teachers used to demonstrate different problems or notations to students. It was written on with something called "chalk" which was made from an animal that is now extinct due to over harvesting.)

That's just silly, why wouldn't he have simply projected the necessary information from his computer?

can open my book and turn the pages anytime. If you know what I mean.

Reading club?

This movie is squarely up my alley. I am there.

Denzel playing Denzel, and I'll be there. Though I am genuinely fearful about an underwhelming "book that will save humanity" twist.

Hopefully the teacher doesn't ask me to come up to the blackboard to answer a question.

RACE WAAA...wait, scratch that. Everyone go about their business.

Gary Oldman? No trailer needed. Sold.

Hey isn't Gary Oldman really Clay Shaw?

Actually buc white people have a misconception of Al Sharpton in general. White people think that Al Sharpton is a racist and a person that likes to cause trouble. Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson wouldn’t have a platform to speak on if racism didn’t exist. The NAACP wouldn’t exist if racism didn’t exist. If African Americans simply sat around and waited for the benevolence of others to stop their racist ways, it would have never happened. The NAACP, Jesse Jackson, and Al Sharton didn’t simply appear out of thin air. They came about because of injustice.

Something tells me that because M. Night Sham has nothing to do with this project that it couldn't be *that* underwhelming.

Book of Eli A.K.A. Blade's Children of Men on the I Am Legend Road.

Buc I find it funny that you believe that Al is the problem and not the injustice itself being the problem.
---
Can't they BOTH be a problem? Even though I kinda like Al, he's a smart, wily bastard who knows exactly how to play people to achieve his ends, whatever they may be.

Jesus Christ, Who, I was pointing out that black actors are effectively barred from sinister (and often fun and juicy) roles in mainstream movies. Why couldn't Anton Chighur have been a black guy, for instance? Why do Denzil and Will Smith have to be heroes and swell fellows all the fucking time?

Can't we just get along on that?

One.

Everyone already knows that a black man can't survive the apocalypse (the dark skin blocks vitamin D synthesis! osteoporosis, the secret killer in all those sun-blocked-out-by-evil-clouds movies!)

Two.

Why aren't the Coen brothers directing The Road? They're good because they're white, er, wait, wait, I kid. Spike Lee directed Inside Man with Denzel, and that was good, and man, was Jodie Foster hot, because she was white. Er, because she's a lesbian.

Three.

Denzel, oh Denzel. He does best when he can be kinda smarmy, like in Inside Man, because men who have been chased for 31 years are not Denzel Washington. They're dead. Or white, because they can absorb the tiny amount of UV let through by the clouds that allows vitamin D synthesis. You know what? I want to see a post apocalyptic movie where it's SUNNY, bright and sunny and all the ozone is gone and maybe the magnetosphere, and maybe there's no clouds at all because, I dunno, we're super duper dry, and all fair skinned people are dead, or hiding in caves, becoming whiter, because of cancer or exposure, and then Denzel can thrive in that role. Maybe.

Four.

Man, Obama and Gates have had me thinking in terms of black and white recently. I think Gates, if his story is accurate, has a perfect lawsuit. He was arrested in his own house after proving that he lived there by showing his ID? What the hell? Lawsuit!

Maybe he was whining because he was lacking vitamin D. Just a thought.

I’m sorry replica, I’m Guess Who! Not Pookie. Pookie will go down in the annals of pajiba as a misunderstood visionary.

deist, I haven't seen the other SLJ films you mention, but if his roles are all like "Pulp Fiction" then: No. Jules is a stone killer but he's not evil. We're supposed to like him. He's eloquent and funny and raises hell. I guess on that strike he's a lot like Hannibal Lecter, but still: That's not what I'm talking about.

And I've read the plot summary for "Unbreakable." Seriously? Does Elijah turn out to be pure evil? I mean, "Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer" evil, with no soul and no conscience? I'd be surprised ... and I'd have to see it.

Now I will try to look up the Danny Glover movie, but let me ask first: Are we supposed to be sympathetic to his character? Is his serial killing revealed as the result of some trauma? Does it turn out he's brain-damaged, "Radio" with a gun? Or is he a very, very bad man with no redeeming social value?

I admit I do not know who Tiny Lister is.

Cool. I must find this.