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November 18, 2008 |

By Daniel Carlson | Trailers | November 18, 2008 |

A guy at work sent me the link to this trailer yesterday. I didn’t know what he was sending me —¬†and was worried it might be the hamster on the piano, or even the chicken police — but I courageously clicked through to find this gem of a preview, this horrible, awful, gleefully terrible look at what promises to be some stellar filmmaking. (Also, I am using the word “stellar” to mean “brain-rapingly bad.”) It’s a weird hybrid of action and comedy and crap.

The movie is called Bitch Slap, and it looks to have all the style and subtlety you’d expect from something clearly aimed at males who are not old enough to buy actual pornography but would be willing to ride their bikes down to Blockbuster to rent the latest softcore tits-and-guns extravaganza. Here’s a sample from the actual site describing the character of Camero [sic] the “Psycho-Slut”:

A drug-running, two-fisted, large-busted, psycho-killing Tasmanian devil, Camero’s the muscle of the trio. … At the tender age of 9, she ran away from home after stabbing her stepfather in the balls with a cocktail fork. Raised by wolves on the mean streets of Billings, Camero eventually made her way to L.A. as part of a Motocross Death Squad. Man-hater and marauder, Camero believes she’s the only person in the world she can trust. Maybe she’s right….

I want this on DVD now so I can get drunk and watch it with all of you.

It’s so bizarre and weird and wildly exploitive and just amazing. Here’s the trailer:

Teh Boobies, They Are Everywhere

An Actual Trailer, I Swear / Daniel Carlson

Trailers | November 18, 2008 |

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