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Zack Snyder's New Man of Steel Poster Is Super Unrealistic

By Dustin Rowles | Trade News | December 3, 2012 | Comments ()


Man-of-Steel-Logo-header-550x343.jpg

I mean, COME ON. A pair a handcuffs and a few guys in soldier costumes is going to stop Superman? Yeah, right. GOD. He's the Man of Steel, for God's sake. You don't control a cowlick with butter, do you? Then you don't try to contain Superman with handcuffs.

I HATE THIS MOVIE ALREADY. Bring in Tebow. Zack Snyder is clearly not cutting it.

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Comments Are Welcome, Jerks Will Be Banned


  • Bennetttt

    Yes, hate it then watch it anyway and be remarkably surprised at its genius, come back praise it, then after repeated viewings, complain about how predictable it was, and how you said you hated it from the start, and move on to the next...
    ( ͡° ʖ‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌‌ ͡°)

  • Someone was asleep on the job when they made this one. The first poster for this movie was crisp and clean, and this one was hacked away with the Blur tool. What gives? Superman's not in clear focus, instead blending in with the Orwellian stormtroopers. The backlighting from the door behind them is distracting, not enhancing. I'll chalk the handcuffs up to possible Kryptonite ones or, as people have said, Superman abiding by human law, but that's honestly not the worst thing about this poster.

  • Buck Forty

    This is a teaser poster for movie still over 6 months from release. There will be a better one coming closer to the time. Relax people, its just one poster... and a bit early to huff "I'm not going now"

  • superasente

    The question presented by all of Superman's actions is not "Can I do this?" but rather "Should I do this?" When the character is written with this in mind (though not forgetting the inherent kindness which is necessary for a being of ultimate power if you want to keep him from becoming cruel and corruptible) he becomes one of the most relatable, engaging, and interesting characters in comics. After all, t's a question we each present ourselves with every time we encounter moral ambiguity. "Should I...?"

    When people see more of the moral question that Superman faces by simply stepping outside his door, they will not be able to help falling in love. This is what I'll be looking for in 2013.

  • Holy God, those arms are giving Thor a run for his money.

    Kidding. No one has arms like Thor. But he's coming pretty damn close. Rawr.

  • Zee

    Henry cavill is in the best shape of all superhero actors. Google his images from the Man of Steel set and you'll see those muscles are real.

  • Fabius_Maximus

    Well, the poster's already working.

  • Arran

    Look—as long as the movie features a bad guy trying to pull a real estate scam, we'll all be happy.

  • HardShadow

    This is either sarcasm or the result of a needless cantankerous attitude. It is a movie poster. Nothing here is indicative of the final project. Good grief.

  • TheOriginalMRod

    What? No red panties?

  • BlackRabbit

    Nope, got rid of them.

  • BobbFrapples

    Supes goes commando these days.

  • Green Lantern

    I've previously discussed on Facespace that he could get out of those if he wanted to. IF he did...which he obviously does NOT.

  • the dude

    so he's doing a 2012 villain's plan? He wants to get caught. So he can destry them from the inside. Loki, Silva, and the joker approve

  • Lotney

    Looks like they are already pulling the kryptonite storyline cop out from their incompetent coward asses. This or they are getting SuperDouche to play the law abiding citizen card as usual while he should be out there obliterating the bad guys with his pinky.

  • bleujayone

    This movie poster is the best way they could come up with to entice us to this movie? He looks annoyed. ANNOYED for fuck's sake! Our hero, ladies and gentlemen. Sure, we don't know the full storyline, but this doesn't look all that intense. If he's willingly surrendered for some reason, then the soldiers escorting him should look petrified and be shitting themselves knowing the alien demigod in their custody could just as soon change his mind and rip them to pieces without working up a sweat. If he's surrendered because someone actually somehow beat him legitimately in a battle then he should look like dogshit and appear emotionally distraught.

    So unless those are Kryptonite shackles and those soldiers' guns are armed with Kryptonite bullets, it's pointless to have any of that present and that would mean Clark is just fucking with them all. They might as well be dressed in Speedos and prodding him with Fun-Noodles for all the good the guns and body armor would really do. I mean really, if you're going to show Superman broken and defeated, you need to show him looking a little disheveled. A dirty or torn uniform, his hair messed up, a fat lip and a blackened eye or even just a look of despair on his face, maybe? He has this look like he's debating with himself on what he's going to have for dinner when he finally grows wearisome of this charade and goes home from here tonight.

    By comparison, if for example, the Richard Donner version of Superman had a poster featuring a shot of our hero in that movie's climax of him wrapped in very obvious Kyptonite chains and drowning underwater- THAT would be compelling. Oddly enough, the two posters they had settled on were one of just the S-Shield and the other of him flying toward the viewer. That's all we needed. It worked in its simplicity. This isn't simplicity, it's just too vague of details and frustrating in the few we have.

    And whomever blurred the soldiers, darkened the image, muddied the colors and then took a whiz on it with a giant lens flare to bring us this turd on a Triscuit should have a 500 yard restraining order around any computer and an additional 1000 yard perimeter from those with Photoshop on them.

  • AxlProse

    NEEEEEEEEEEERRDDDDD!

  • bleujayone

    It's GEEEEEEEK! Get it right.

  • e jerry powell

    FUCK TEBOW. Fuck him right in his ear!

  • I seriously hope you're being satirical, because otherwise you sound like an idiot.

  • sistercoyote

    Clearly you do tug on Superman's cape.

    I would not recommend spitting into the wind, however.

  • Pulling the mask off the Lone Ranger is a toss-up. I think you could get away with it if you promised him a real Native American for a sidekick.

  • sistercoyote

    Which leaves us with the question of whether or not one should mess around with Jim.

    But I don't know how to make a determination from there -- after all, which Jim are we talking about? Jim Kirk? (probably -- but not definitely -- not a good idea) Jim Morrison? (Dead; moot point.) Jim Henson? (see Jim Morrison. Though I would not mess with Jim Henson for the same reason I wouldn't mess with any songwriter: my name is funny and scans to Greensleeves.) Jim C. Hines? (The guy poses as fantasy novel covers to raise money for charity. Do Not Mess With.)

    Jim Carrey? (Eh, probably. Unless it's Cable Guy Carrey, in which case no, do not mess with the crazy).

  • Jim Beam? I mean, it's cheap and bad, but we could mess around with it and come up with fairly amusing results...

  • sistercoyote

    Maybe it's more than one Jim and we could combine Jim Beam with any/all of the above and see what happens...

  • Phaedre

    I'm sorry... I wasn't paying attention because I was too busy checking out those ARMS!

  • Mr_Zito

    I don't see a problem with the scene, he can be just going along to prove he is innocent and not a threat to the humans bla bla bla oh this movie is gonna be so stupid...

  • Socraz6

    He allows himself to be handcuffed for the same reason he doesn't just up and kill all the bad guys and testifies in court. Because he respects the laws of man. This scene is totally plausible, and actually makes me think that they might get the internal conflict that makes Superman interesting as a character right in this movie.

  • Lotney

    That's exactly why I hate the lawful shenanigans with supers. Does he choose what laws are valid to him or does he apply for FAA flight permits before taking off?

  • Socraz6

    You should read Kingdom Come. It sort of deals with what happens when Superman gets fed up with the legal system and just peaces out for a couple decades to a space station that he builds for himself. Good stuff.

  • I don't know if this is the first official one-sheet you want for your summer tentpole reboot, but I think it's a pretty ingenious image that perfectly sums up Superman's internal struggle to do the right thing by human standards all while trying to constantly protect the humans from killing themselves which he can only do by being more than human.

    Or maybe I'm just reading too much into it.

  • The Heretic

    Agreed. This is why Superman is both the most boring and the most difficult character to write. He is so over-powered that we have to stretch our imaginations to pose physical challenges, and he is at the same time quite difficult to render plausible in these days of popular anti-heroes and other variants of rife cynicism.

  • pcloadletter

    Far be it for me to be the only yeasayer here, but YAY. I love Superman. I love the grainy look of it and that it's giving you what you don't expect from a Superman poster. I'm excited and fuck all y'all.

  • Fredo

    Weak poster but I guess they're trying to sell hard the idea that people of today wouldn't just be all happy about an admitted illegal extra-terrestrial trying to butt into the problems of America and the world.

    Meanwhile, Dustin, they're skipping Tebow and going right for McElroy.

  • Tracer Bullet

    Any particular reason his costume appears to be made of gator skin? Does he have the shoes to match? Will this movie feature scenes of Superman pimpin' hoes and slammin' Cadillac doe's?

  • BlackRabbit

    Does Kal-El have to choke a bitch?

  • James

    It isn't uncommon for Superman to do exactly this in any story where he is accused of breaking the law.

  • Bert_McGurt

    This had better not be a bloody "Superman loses his powers for the 347th time because we can't f*cking make him relatable otherwise" plot. I'd rather see a Jimmy Olsen movie.

  • Luke Anthony Matthews

    Kryptonite handcuffs!?!

  • DeistBrawler

    I did a google image search for Man of Steel movie poster and this doesn't appear anywhere...

    It doesn't even have the quality of a proper poster. The whole fucking thing is blurry.

  • DeistBrawler

    So apparently this is legit...it premiered on the official The Dark Knight Rises facebook page.

    I still stand by my statement. This poster looks like it was made by a hack job.

  • Ginger

    Yeah, NO. I'm a movie poster designer. This just makes us look bad.

  • PC78

    You can cuff him only if he wants to for some reason we'll find out in the movie. I hope...

  • Groundloop

    My guess is it's part of some mildly kinky sex play. Luthor's bald head and a jar of Jalapeno Tex Mex Cheez Whiz also factor in.

  • Mrcreosote

    Lens flare renders Superman powerless. Also it renders BSlim Furious.

  • Joe Grunenwald

    I know that this is an out-of-context image. I'm sure there's a story reason for Superman to have handed himself over for something. But COME ON. THIS is your poster? THIS?! SERIOUSLY? Who okayed this?

    "Why show a guy who can fly when we can show him in handcuffs? Gold, Jerry, gold!"

    Not. Promising.

  • Pants_are_a_must

    And what's with the lens flare? Are we marrying the Abrams school of filming with the Nolan one by way of SHIT?

  • Pinky McLadybits

    GAH. I hate Superman. Maybe they are Kryptonite-infused cuffs? Rendering him pansy, er, powerless?

  • sistercoyote

    They'd need to be Pink Kryptonite for that.

    And yes. It's canon.

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