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Who is the Flakiest Director in Hollywood?

By Dustin Rowles | Posted Under Trade News | Comments (36)



EmmaWatsonMarkSeligerPS_2_123_95lo.jpg

I am consistently annoyed by Guillermo del Toro, the trade news coverage of del Toro, and the importance that movie blogs seem to afford projects with which he’s attached. He’s a great director — at least when he’s working on Spanish-language films (Cronos, The Devil’s Backbone and Pan’s Labyrinth), but he’s only been an average one when it comes to English-language flicks (Hellboy, Hellboy 2 and the less than mediocre Mimic and Blade II). Yet, he’s allegedly one of the most sought after directors in Hollywood, despite the fact that his biggest box office success was the $82 million made by Blade II.

What’s even more annoying to me is how popular he has become during these last three years, a period in which he hasn’t made a single film, although his name has been attached as producer on a few stinkers like While She Was Out and the box-office failure Splice. For good measure, he was also attached as producer to Kung Fu Panda 2 and, as well as the forthcoming Puss in Boots. Why? I have no idea.

So why do we care so much about Guillermo del Toro? On a wide scale, what has he given us to demonstrate how great a director he is besides Pan’s Labyrinth? He spent two years working on The Hobbit before bolting, leaving Peter Jackson to pick up the pieces. What was the reason? According to del Toro, “The mounting pressures of conflicting schedules” became overwhelming. My question is this: What conflicting schedules? In the 14 months since he left The Hobbit, del Toro still hasn’t made a damn thing. All he has done is what he did before and during his time on The Hobbit, namely attach himself to projects he will probably never direct.

The one movie he has actually managed to put into motion is Pacific Rim, which Charlie Day, Idris Elba, and Charlie Hunnam are now attached to. Will it actually be made? I’d like to think so, but del Toro’s resume is littered with half-started projects and partially formed thoughts. Does he lack attention span? Is he lazy? Or is he just flaky? Is he more interested in putting his name out there than actually making a film? Or maybe, at this point, he’s afraid that he won’t live up to the reputation of a great director that he’s cultivated over the last three years.

The latest film he’s attached his name to, according to Coming Soon, is a Beauty and the Beast remake with Emma Watson in the lead. It’s in the early stages now, which is where almost all of del Toro’s projects remain. Will he actually make it? History doesn’t suggest as much. Taking Pacific Rim off the table, in the last few years, he’s been attached to direct (or produce) at least 21 films with which he hasn’t moved forward. That doesn’t mean he won’t at some point, but if he keeps piling on new projects, he’ll never get to any of the 21 below. At a certain point, one wonders if the “mounting pressures of conflicting schedules” is all in his head.

Here are the 21 projects he’s with which he’s been attached or is still attached.


1. Beauty and the Beast with Emma Watson

2. An adaptation of Drood, a Dan Simmons novel.

3. Another Frankenstein adaptation.

4. Another Dr. Jekyl and Mr. Hyde adaptation.

5. Another version of Kurt Vonnegut’s Slaughterhouse Five.

6. A stop-motion remake of Roald Dahl’s The Witches

7. A movie based on the Oni Press comic book The Coffin

8. An adaptation of the Alexandre Dumas novel The Count of Monte Cristo called The Left Hand of Darkness.

9. Meat Market: A Love Story, about a deformed man who lives in the sewers under a meat market who falls in love with the meat market owners’ daughter.

10. Disney’s Haunted Mansion, in 3D.

11. An adaptation of Domu, a graphic novel created by Katsuhiro Otomo.

12. Another version of Van Helsing that once had Tom Cruise attached.

13. A move based on At the Mountains of Madness by H.P. Lovecraft.

14. The Hobbit

15. Hellboy 3

16. A 3D film called Trollhunters

17. A new “Hulk” TV series.

18. As producer and writer of a 3D stop-motion animation adaptation of Pinocchio.

19. Adapting the British TV series, “Champions.”

20. Pan, a re-imagining of J.M. Barrie’s Peter Pan

21. As producer of Rodrigo Blaas’ animated short Alma.









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Comments

Maybe I'm just simple but isn't this just a case of him being known as a director of fantasy movies so any fantasy movie that is proposed he becomes attached to? Almost all the movies you listed are in the fantasy/horror genre and he's the big name fantasy movie director.

But I do agree that his Hellboy movies left something to be desired and I love Hellboy.

Posted by: logan at July 19, 2011 11:27 AM

Holyshitballs that's a lot to be attached to. But damn it Dustin, don't stomp on my dreams of a film with all the loves of my life (Elba, Hunnam and Day) by saying it will never progress past negotiations. Especially because this titillating film means that Quentin Tarantino's Django Unchained is now ruined (lack of Idris Elba). Stomp on the dreams of anyone else, I don't care, just don't take Pacific Rim away from me.

Posted by: beet salad at July 19, 2011 11:31 AM

I thought the Hobbit fiasco was more along the lines of what was supposed to be a 2-year commitment ballooning into a 6-year project, unless I read that one news bit wrong...

Posted by: Markus at July 19, 2011 11:41 AM

For the love of everything holy someone please make these people leave Dumas and Peter Pan alone. They've been done to death. No more!

Posted by: figgy at July 19, 2011 11:55 AM

When did "Don't Be Afraid of the Dark" get moved to "stinker" status. I though that one had solid buzz. Is that legitimate or are you just being snarky toward a Katie Holmes movie?

Gah. You're right. I totally confused that bland title with another bland title of a movie that's already been released. There may still yet be hope for "Don't Be Afraid of the Dark." -- DR

Posted by: TylerDFC at July 19, 2011 11:55 AM

Good point about The Hobbit.

He was supposed to be too busy to stick around for it but he hasn't really done anything since.

Posted by: John W at July 19, 2011 12:00 PM

I don't get the love for Pan's Labyrinth. I feel no need in my life for a fairy tale about fascism. Being a great art director/production designer is not enough c.f Tim Burton.

To sum up:

I don't like Pan's Labyrinth,
I don't like the Batman movies,
I don't like Seven,
I find Community annoying.
Arrested Development? No.
Ditto True Blood.
Charlie Kaufman has yet to write a movie where I care enough about the characters to raise the final product to the level of his writing. I look forward to the day when he does.
I have no interest in zombies,
I haven't read Game of Thrones and don't plan to, although I would watch it if we had HBO.

Posted by: Mrs. Julien at July 19, 2011 12:01 PM

And you call yourself Pajiban, you son of a bitch?

Posted by: Alec Baldwin at July 19, 2011 12:01 PM

Splice shouldn't have been a wide release. It was too small, intimate, and horribly mis-marketed for wider appeal to succeed. That's not his fault.

I'm not going to condemn the man for picking and choosing products selectively. This is especially true since he put most of his efforts recently into writing his debut novel trilogy The Strain. The paperback edition of the first book alone can be used to bludgeon a smaller adult to death and it's a damn fine read.

Posted by: Robert at July 19, 2011 12:05 PM

Maybe we shouldn't be asking question of Del Toro, maybe this all gets back to the idea of people being "attached" to projects?

I thought we had discussed this before (if not multiple times) by listing actors/directors with so many projects it's impossible to finish more than 10%. I'm still calling bullshit on Jeremy Renner as Hawkeye, NotJason Bourne and NotEthan Hunt. One of them gets axed, as he's not doing 10 or so movies in 15 years between those 3 characters.

Do we blame the studios? The principles involved? Or is this a function of movie blogs running with either made-up bullshit, overplaying rumors, or studios feeding information solely for propaganda notoriety?

I wouldn't blame him for the lack of Hellboy's success, those movies always had a limited appeal when you're headlining (the awesome but clearly not-mainstream) Perlman and a comic book of limited popularity. He clearly makes movies he has a passion for, and that's reflected in our constant clamoring for more Del Toro.

Posted by: D-Day at July 19, 2011 12:09 PM

Alec Baldwin with the WIN for the day. Bravo, sir. A well placed "GGR" quote is always welcome.

Posted by: TylerDFC at July 19, 2011 12:12 PM

Mrs. Julien, you get the standing slow clap from this corner. A true Pajiban is not afraid to be the lone voice in the wilderness. But I'd start a'runnin from the rest of the Pajibans if I were you, they're coming for ya after that Batman crack...

Posted by: Anne At Large at July 19, 2011 12:28 PM

And I forgot to add my indifference to 30 Rock .

I'll get started on some stretches.

Posted by: Mrs. Julien at July 19, 2011 12:40 PM

Ooh girl! Get yer running shoes on!

Posted by: Anne At Large at July 19, 2011 12:47 PM

I'm indifferent to Del Toro - I've barely watched any of his movies, though his visual style is beautiful.

BUT - I strenuously object to ANYTHING being titled "The Left Hand of Darkness" that is not LeGuin's Left Hand of Darkness.. Which doesn't need to be made into a movie.

Especially a Dumass book. Wtf.

Posted by: Sara Tonin at July 19, 2011 12:54 PM

Man, I'd hate for those remakes/"reimagining"s you listed up there to fall by the wayside. Get it together, Del Toro!

Really though... another Van Helsing? Featuring Tom Cruise? Who comes up with these terrible ideas?

Posted by: MelBivDevoe at July 19, 2011 12:55 PM

Alright Mrs. J, so enough about what you don't do. Let's talk about what you do do.

Posted by: Socrates_Johnson at July 19, 2011 12:57 PM

Ditto, Sara Tonin. Leave The Left Hand of Darkness title alone where it belongs. Hopefully no one will ever try to make a movie of that book, since I think it would be completely impossible.

There would be a great role for Tilda Swinton, though.

Posted by: Drake at July 19, 2011 1:12 PM

I do do that voodoo that I do so well.

Posted by: Mrs. Julien at July 19, 2011 1:13 PM

Doo be doo be doo

Posted by: Frank Sinatra at July 19, 2011 1:13 PM

Scooby doobie doo scoobadee doo

Posted by: A pup named... at July 19, 2011 1:47 PM

Run as fast as you can (in your corset) Mrs. J!
I'll try to distract them!

"Steve Buscemi is nothing but a character actor! And he's not even that good at that!"

Posted by: logan at July 19, 2011 1:51 PM

Duran Duran was neither a Duran nor a Duran. Discuss.

Posted by: Socrates_Johnson at July 19, 2011 1:55 PM

emma looks so so pretty here.

why emma? WHY?!

Posted by: haplo at July 19, 2011 2:06 PM

Good lighting?

Posted by: Mrs. Julien at July 19, 2011 2:15 PM

Guillermo del Toro is kind of like Terry Gilliam, great ideas and plans, but budgets, and studio buy in, limit their ability to move forward on those projects. Trying to sell Chtuhlu to Hollywood is quite the quixotic endeavor.

Posted by: MRod at July 19, 2011 2:34 PM

Good lighting?

nope. dats not it.

Posted by: haplo at July 19, 2011 4:48 PM

Imagine a genie put you in a harem of Eva Greens and Alison Bries, all wanting you at the same time, whispering sins into your ear, moaning obscenities, writhing in anticipation of your touch...

How many do you think you'd satisfy? Poor Guillermo is just butter scraped over too much bread.

Posted by: AmbroseKalifornia at July 19, 2011 4:53 PM

I dunno. I would watch ANYTHING this guy made, even if it was shit thrown against a wall, based on movies like Cronos and Devil's Backbone. Yes, he has something up his ass about the Spanish Civil War. But wow. Really.

Posted by: space oddity at July 19, 2011 7:55 PM

Re: Emma looking pretty

Give me a head with hair, long beautiful hair
Shining, gleaming, streaming, flaxen, waxen
Give me down to there, hair, shoulder length or longer
Here baby, there, momma, everywhere, daddy, daddy

Posted by: jollies at July 19, 2011 8:13 PM

i din go tru the comments bcoz i just had to comment on emma first.

So Mrs. J hates nihilism and fascism.

Are there anymore -isms u're not telling us?

Posted by: haplo at July 19, 2011 9:12 PM

I'm not big on fanaticism either.

I've got a lot of rules.

Posted by: Mrs. Julien at July 19, 2011 10:00 PM

Socrates_Johnson, well-played with the Friends/Chandler reference.

Posted by: TurnipTheRadio at July 20, 2011 12:50 AM

Thank you! Could I BE anymore obvious with the quotes?

Posted by: Socrates_Johnson at July 20, 2011 9:25 AM

Am I the only person to think that Blade II was actually fun?

Posted by: Dee at July 20, 2011 2:41 PM

"the less than mediocre Mimic"

Goddamn did Mimic suck. At least Blade II had Wesley Snipes snap two dozen guys' necks in one scene, then stop a swinging blade with his bare hands, take the blade away, and cut the guy in half.

Actually, that is still one of the more badass scenes I've seen in any film. Still, Blade II not as good as Blade.

Also, from reading the New Yorker I was under the impression that Del Toro was in the process of finishing At The Mountains of Madness.

Posted by: NF at July 24, 2011 1:54 AM