web counter
 

Which of These 5 Actresses Is Best Suited to Play a Porn-Star with a Bottomless Gullet?

By Dustin Rowles | Posted Under Trade News | Comments (29)

Olivia Wilde 1280X800.jpg

The Linda Lovelace biopic is picking up steam again, after one actress was booted from one project and replaced by another actress, before that Linda Lovelace movie was put on the back burner and another sprung forth in its place, like a regenerating penis that throbs in the presence of cash.

Here are the five women variously associated with the two Linda Lovelace projects so far.

olivia_wilde_maxim_magazine_5.jpg

amanda-seyfried-black-and-white-portrait.jpg

drunk-lindsay-lohan.jpg

malin_akerman_sexy_1715982-other.jpg

f0afc795d7udson32.jpg

So, here’s the order of events: Lindsay Lohan was once attached to the first Linda Lovelace project, but the producers of that film realized that Lindsay Lohan was Lindsay Lohan so they replaced her with Malin Akerman. However, that project — still technically alive — is now being pushed to the background by a new Linda Lovelace biopic which originally had Kate Hudson attached, but Kate Hudson got pregnant, so — according to rumor — they were eyeing Olivia Wilde.

But not anymore. Now Amanda Seyfried is in negotiations to play the porn star turned anti-porn advocate. Meanwhile, Peter Sarsgaard is in negotiations to play Chuck Traynor, who was Lovelace’s classy manager, husband and pimp.

Lovelace, of course, began her career as a dog f*cker (literally, as she starred in a bestiality film called Dog F*cker) before she gained fame in Deep Throat, one of the first porn films to feature anal. I think she also built baking soda volcanoes in her mouth. Or something. Anyway, after several bad choices, a bout with drug addiction, and a divorce from Traynor — who she claimed forced her into pornography at gunpoint — Lovelace joined the feminist anti-pornography movement before later succumbing to injuries from an automobile accident.

Pretty harrowing life.

I have to say, actually, that out of the five women in contention to play Linda Lovelace, Lindsay Lohan might have been the most appropriate choice, while Amanda Seyfried would’ve been the last woman to come to mind.

Actress-Linda-Lovelace.jpg

(Source: Variety)









Each Time You Like, Share, Tweet or Stumble a Pajiba Post, An Angel Does the Paul Rudd Dance

← The Gays! They're Destroying America! Look at this (Adorable, Heartwarming) Filth! | Conservative Wingnut Believes Boone from "Lost" Is a Terrorist Threat to Humanity →









Comments

I wouldn't mind seeing Wilde or Seyfried in this, although I don't think either one is actually talented enough to carry a movie on her own.

Posted by: Todd at November 2, 2011 10:34 AM

Delicious, delicious.

I’m sorry, you were saying something?

Posted by: Scully at November 2, 2011 10:36 AM

As much as I dislike her for being unrelentingly topless (it doesn't make sense, I know), Olivia Wilde would be a good Linda Lovelace. No to Seyfried. She has one of those eternally-high-school looks.

Posted by: sars at November 2, 2011 10:44 AM

It took me forever to recognize any of those women, and then I only got like two of them. Olivia Wilde also looks incredibly uncomfortable. Why would anyone pose like that? She looks like she's fallen off the couch and can't get back up again because her legs are broken.

Posted by: figgy at November 2, 2011 10:45 AM

Amanda Seyfried would be the best of the five. I love Olivia Wilde but she can't act... at least not in anything she's been in other than House.

Posted by: reaperslogic at November 2, 2011 10:46 AM

Isn't one of the Kardashian sisters available?

Or Paris Hilton? She already has a porn film in her resume.

Posted by: John W at November 2, 2011 11:21 AM

Did Lovelace have A cups?

Then Wilde is your girl.

Posted by: , at November 2, 2011 11:28 AM

We've seen everyone on this list topless except Kate Hudson, and I'm not even positive about her. Plus, remember this is a period piece and will require a big ol' furry merkin.

Still, I vote for Olivia Wilde whenever she's in the running for anything...

Posted by: sean at November 2, 2011 11:37 AM

You're doing the asterisks too?

Posted by: Jay at November 2, 2011 11:38 AM

I'm sorry...I can't get past the dog thing. A dog? REALLY?

Posted by: Whorish Mouth at November 2, 2011 11:43 AM

you have no name, apparently you go by "," so I'll address you as such...

dear comma,

Wilde doesn't have A cups, she's most definitely a B cup. if anyone on here is an A cup, it's Kate Hudson, but she has recently received a small boob job because of her insecurities about her chest, so she may be up into B cup status now.

Posted by: sean at November 2, 2011 11:46 AM

@sean.... ,is his name. And don't you forget it. Think of the comma as the thing Prince turned himself into when he was tired of going by 'Prince'. Now, mind you,,, like Prince, won't aknowlege his former name. I think he's a few months from naming himself 'The Commenter', but eventually, after finding god again, and refusing ever again to perform songs like 'Darling Nikki' , will retrn to his original handle.

Posted by: PissBoy at November 2, 2011 12:09 PM

I love this sentence I just wrote....

Now, mind you,,, like Prince, won't aknowlege his former name.

World record for comma usage, and each one of the is grammatically correct.

Posted by: PissBoy at November 2, 2011 12:10 PM

before she gained fame in Deep Throat, one of the first porn films to feature anal.

Really? I highly doubt that it was one of the first to feature anal. I've watched some old black and white porn from, like, the 40s (maybe earlier, maybe later). Man, those guys did everything they do in porn today. Three-ways, dp, biracial (apparently still taboo, the horror!), cum shots...pretty much anything you can think of (though, I'm not sure if this one video is cosplay or if those dudes were really sailors). I don't specifically recall anal (and I can't lookup "Deepthroat" at work, again), but I'd be surprised if that shit hadn't been done to death by the time Deep Throat came around.

Posted by: pissant at November 2, 2011 12:13 PM

I read her biography many many many years ago and it stayed with me how horrible her life was. It also indicated the Sammy Davis Jr was scum personified as well. I hate even thinking about Linda Lovelace and I hate thinking someone is going to make a movie of this...life...this wretched life. Even if only 10 percent (random low number) of what she wrote was true , her life in porn was worse than a stray dog's.

Sorry. I really hate porn. I can't define it, but I know it when my skin crawls.

Posted by: klingonfree at November 2, 2011 12:49 PM

As a dude that does watch porn, trust me, Seyfried is the only one on here that looks like a pornstar. Believe it or don't.

Posted by: junierizzle at November 2, 2011 1:23 PM

(and I can't lookup "Deepthroat" at work, again) Posted by: pissant

"Again"? As opposed to "still"? My employer gives us 3 weeks of vacation from years 5 - 15, but in the 10th year, we get a bonus week which they take away again. Is is it a deal like that, but for porn surfing?

Posted by: Mrs. Julien at November 2, 2011 1:29 PM

//bowed head, raised fist in solidarity with klingonfree//

Posted by: Mrs. Julien at November 2, 2011 1:30 PM

@klingonfree I, too read Ordeal (I think that was the title) many years ago. And, yeah, yikes.

I know it's a matter of personal opinion, but to be honest, the dog stuff wasn't actually the worst part of the book to me (and that is pretty f***ing bad). She really did have a wretched life and if the movie leans even the teansiest bit too far into exploitative, then it will be just too vile for most to watch.

And I must agree that, actually, Lohan would be the best choice. If she get sober enough and takes the damn project seriously enough that is. What the hell did I just write?

Posted by: Jill at November 2, 2011 2:14 PM

Chloe Sevigny.

Posted by: The Mutt at November 2, 2011 2:44 PM

Posted by: Jay at November 2, 2011 3:44 PM

The problem with mainstream porn and why so many people (mostly women) find it problematic is because they are all tailor-made to serve the male gaze. Women are just objects and the 'exagerratedness' of it all is just a turn off.
However there is alternate porn, especially with the coming of Internet porn, mostly made by feminists, which has women(and men)as active participants in pleasure and they really are hot. You find people of all shapes and sizes and gender affiliations and most of it is done in an ethical way.
I have a huge problem with the anti-porn stance of a certain kind of feminism (the McKinnon-Dworkin one). It has done a lot to point out the exploitation and mistreatment of women in mainstream porn but on reading their treatises I cannot but disagree with their wish to ban pornography. There is scope and potential for non-exploitative, sex-positive and female-friendly pornography and it deserves to be publicized and patronized more.
I hope this is sort of on topic. As for the biopic, I think Sevigny will be a good choice as well.

Posted by: severine at November 2, 2011 3:52 PM

Lohan wouldn't even have to act, just show up.

I read that horrendous book as well, the dog thing was disgusting, it was a snarly beast that growled at her the whole time, and Sammy Davis JR, if you believe her, and I kinda do, blew Chuck Traynor while they were watching a movie
(probably porn). A mixture of loose sex and cocaine was a gamechanger for many in the 70's. I'm sure Davis' widow wants no part of a Lovelace biopic, since she joined in the festivities.

Posted by: Kirbyjay at November 2, 2011 5:50 PM

btw...who is the 4th pic up there? It looks like it could be Mila in Boot Camp but the wardrobe is off.

Posted by: Kirbyjay at November 2, 2011 5:53 PM

"As a dude that does watch porn, trust me, Seyfried is the only one on here that looks like a pornstar. Believe it or don't."

But Linda Lovelace really DIDN'T look like a pornstar. That's her picture at the bottom of the article. She looks like a soccer mom. With side-boob.

Posted by: Craig at November 2, 2011 5:55 PM

I'm incapable of reason when it comes to Olivia Wilde, so really, you might be asking who's more suited to play Santa and I'd also go with Wilde. It's a problem. I'm working on it...in my pants!

Posted by: Joker at November 2, 2011 6:05 PM

No one's ever gonna forgive Chloe Sevigny for that blow job, are they, The Mutt?

In acting, you can do anything you want and you're praised; lose a ton of weight, gain a ton of weight, go into incredibly dark and emotional spaces to really get in touch with a character, live on the streets, live like a soldier, anything. But don't ever perform a real sex act on film for a role, because then you're a dirty whore.

Posted by: John G. at November 2, 2011 11:02 PM

@Craig

Yeah, that's my point, neither does Seyfried, which is why she is the one that looks like a pornstar.

Of course people are going to say Lindsey Lohan but real pornstars look like the girl next door, not the slut next door.

Posted by: junierizzle at November 2, 2011 11:40 PM

Wilde doesn't have A cups, she's most definitely a B cup.
---
13: I was wearing training bras back then. A lot has changed.

House: Not THAT much.

Posted by: , at November 3, 2011 2:00 AM