We Are America and We Will Remake Every Show You Brits Ever Had
We’re in Ur TVz stealin’ all Ur showz.
Seriously, we Americans are simply unable to come up with really good show ideas on our own, so we’re just going to keep remaking the British stuff. We’ve got to dumb it down a bit but you don’t mind, do you? Good.
Now even though A&E has already acquired and aired the original series Spooks (re-dubbed MI-5 because that sounds cooler and we don’t want people to think it’s a kid show), that’s not good enough. We have to twist up your show and squeeze out all the good bits so we can serve the milquetoast leftovers to the Walmart crowd. And they don’t like those fancy foreign accents (need subtitles) or stuff without ACTION! so don’t get your hopes up for any sign of The Grid or intelligence. We’re going to pump out that shit. Heck, let’s just call this what it will be: 24-lite. I don’t know why ABC even bothers, since these remakes usually last a season and then crash and burn anyway.
Michael Seitzman (North Country) is set to write and executive produce. Yeah, I’ve never heard of him either, but he’s sure to do a bang up job. Cheerios!
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