Oh, yay. Consider me one of those who doesn’t get Harmony Korine. Yes, his screenplay for Kids was pretty impressive. But since then? No. Sorry. Not a Gummo fan. Never seen Julien Donkey-Boy or Mister Lonely, and don’t particularly want to.
Well, good news then: apparently, under cover of darkness, and without anyone even knowing, he’s finished his most recent film, the charmingly titled Trash Humpers. It’s described thusly:
Harmony Korine returns to Gummo territory in this handheld video of a loser-gang cult-freak collective who do antisocial things in a nonnarrative way, except for the song-and-dance numbers.
(h/t to Slashfilm). It’ll premiere at the Toronto Film Festival next week, so all you Canadiaks, get to seeing it and report back. Cause I sure as shit ain’t watching it. However, it does give me the opportunity to drive Skitz a little more crazy, which is always fun.
Are you trying to kill him, TK? Skitz is gonna shove Wendel up someone's ass or something now. Well, more so than usual.
Posted by: Julie at August 10, 2009 10:15 AM
gummo was one of the worst f'n things i've ever had the displeasure of watching. will not be seeing this either. however, i am looking forward to skitz's response.
I love the Harmony Korine films I've seen. To each their own, I suppose.
Posted by: TSF at August 10, 2009 10:23 AM
That banner pic is pretty digusting and the primary reason I have never seen this flick. I remember it was a promo photo when the movie first came out. Hearing everyone else bag on it is the other. Also it looks uniformly awful. Zero interest in seeing anything this guy does, including "Kids". Don't care how good it's supposed to be, it looks vile.
GUMMOOOOO!!!
Ugh, that movie thoroughly creeped me out in high school. My friends thought it was so funny. Well, they are mostly musical theater dorks, so this should please them.
As for me, ACK! ACK! ACK! ACK!
Posted by: Patty O'Green at August 10, 2009 10:32 AM
Will we finally discover the mystery of the bacon taped to the wall?
Posted by: branded at August 10, 2009 10:43 AM
Where has Skitz been lately? And for that matter, where have Conrad, Michael Bay and The Real Joe been?
Posted by: Optimus Rhyme at August 10, 2009 11:06 AM
Singing bacon, anyone?
Posted by: Cindy at August 10, 2009 12:04 PM
Taken from an actual review:
"Another one of the biggest treats of "Gummo," is that you could watch it over and over again, just so to catch all of the different elements. There are so many things going on, and so many layers, that by the film's end, it feels like I actually had taken a trip to Xenia and learned a great deal about its history. There is also a great deal of humor, some of which is very funny and obviously not all of it scripted. One particular scene involving an interview with a real albino woman is hilarious, especially when she says her favorite actor is Patrick Swayze. "I would actually pay money to touch him."
Huh. Go figure... Maybe the interview with the Albino woman is what prompted my hate for this film. Upon reading the rest of the review, I decided that maybe it really isn't so bad aft... ARE YOU FUCKING CRAZY, REVIEWER MAN?! ARE YOU OUTTA YOUR GODDAM GOURD LOONEY TUNES?! THE. MOVIE. SUCKED.
And somehow, somehow, studios are letting fucking Korrine continue to - YES I KNOW I SPELLED HIS NAME WRONG, I DON'T FUCKING CARE - continue to make films? Who's brilliant idea is this? Listen brother, if I wanna see a "loser-gang cult-freak collective who do antisocial things", I'll haul my ass toot-sweet down to the bus depot, dig? Furthermore, the fucking reas... Wait. Where's admin? Did your lady friend deliver a small, screaming, goo-covered human yet? 'Cause if not, here's the deal, honky: you take her ass to the Toronto Film Festival next week and - NO, I DON'T KNOW WHERE YOU LIVE IN RELATION TO TORONTO - THE ONLY THING I KNOW ABOUT CANADA IS THERE'S HOCKEY AND IT'S COLORED LIGHT BLUE IN MY RAND McNALLY - anyhow, you take her to go see this hunk of shit and I guarantee, I guaraneffingtee you, that baby will waltz outta her birthin' hole, saunter up to to Korrine (yes, I know how it's spelled), and choke him to death with the umbilimical cord. Shortly thereafter, She/He will be knighted as the President Of All Things Canadian and before you know it, there'll be a giant-ass balloon of your bundle of awesome in Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade, held in place with Harmony Korrine look-alikes dangling from umbilical tethers. I'd be more than happy to help, but I've got a date with a retard film critic, my trunk, and a length of aluminum tubing.
I'll be in the desert most of the afternoon, so there's a good chance my phone won't have a signal...
Posted by: Skitz at August 10, 2009 12:07 PM
P.S. - I'm not The Real Joe. I may be an asshole, but I draw the line at douche...
NO, I DON'T KNOW WHERE YOU LIVE IN RELATION TO TORONTO - THE ONLY THING I KNOW ABOUT CANADA IS THERE'S HOCKEY AND IT'S COLORED LIGHT BLUE IN MY RAND McNALLY
That alone made it worth having that god damned header picture on the home page.
Posted by: Julie at August 10, 2009 12:39 PM
wait wait WAIT!
Why is there no review of Gummo on here?! I've only heard of it from Skitz, and I'm too scared to look for a plot summary but...dammit why has no one reviewed it! Do your jaerbs!
I saw Kids. Pretty creepy. No desire to even touch a copy of Gummo on year store shelf. In fact, I think I would rather be choked by Skitz' umbilical cord wielding terror baby than even be in the vicinity of any of these movies, and just do my own one man show of 'a loser-gang cult-freak collective doing antisocial things.'. With songs.
Posted by: Odnon at August 10, 2009 12:42 PM
Oh. My. God.
I'd like a real-time review, from Skitz himself. That would be... it would re-define the word "epic".
I know I'll regret asking, but what's the aluminum tubing for?
Posted by: Cindy at August 10, 2009 12:52 PM
I'd like a real-time review, from Skitz himself. That would be... it would re-define the word "epic".
Would we be able to look directly at such an event, or would we all need those solar eclipse glasses? I feel something that perfect would scorch my retinas.
Posted by: branded at August 10, 2009 12:53 PM
Oh, I'll look directly at it, branded. I'll print it out, frame it, and hang it next to my bed so I can masturbate to it.
I'm breathing a little heavier just thinking about it. Dustin, get on that, will you?
Posted by: Optimus Rhyme at August 10, 2009 1:19 PM
I came here to complain about what that frakkin' header picture is doing to the Danny Tanner in me, but then I read Skitz' comment and all is forgiven.
Posted by: Anna von Beaverplatz at August 10, 2009 12:42 PM
---
You stole the word I was gonna use. I want it back, or no you-know-what tomorrow.
Posted by: , (the commenter formerly known as bucdaddy) at August 10, 2009 1:59 PM
I don't know if you guys actually do want a review of this thing - there's the idea of 'funny/odd' and 'ick factor/shivers of disgust' you've got in mind from all you've heard so far about it - but you really cannot prepare for 'trough of despair/valley of that which is seen but cannot be unseen'.
Except for the 'gift of tap' part. That plus the forks was the only scene I could recommend even mildly. But getting there...you'd hate me forever.
Posted by: replica at August 10, 2009 5:41 PM
so this whole comment thread made me a little curious about gummo so I wandered over to wikipedia to read the synopsis. What. the. fuck?! Wow. I think I would rather watch the collected works of Micheal Bay, Paul Haggis and Steven Seagal before watching 15 minutes of Gummo. Ugh. I feel like my brain needs a shower just after reading the twenty or so paragraph synopsis.
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Posted by: william at August 10, 2009 10:47 PM
Why are you doing an article on this filmmaker when you've only seen Gummo? Seems kinda pointless.
Posted by: i hate wabbits at August 11, 2009 2:44 PM
ugh... I fucking HATED Gummo with the intensity of a thousand burning suns and yet... you are asking for a real time review... you would surely break Skitz if you do this... I was forced to watch Gummo for a class in college (almost but not quite clockwork orange style by the cracked out grad student posing as my teacher) everyone but me was cumming all over it with praise while I was ready to run screaming from the room... the movie makes you cringe and your skin crawl and uncomfortable and dirty... no... just thinking about it... I need alcohol and a shower... trust me... what has been seen cannot be unseen...
Posted by: Tammers at August 11, 2009 4:02 PM
Plllllllllllllllllllllllllllllleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaase real time review it Skitz? Pretty please? Cherry on top? Or maybe Korinne's head on a stick on top? I'll give you a dollar...
Posted by: jamiepants at August 11, 2009 4:33 PM
gummo was THE BEST MOVIE EVER MADE i hope you all enjoy watching al gore films and seth rogan i personally cannot wait for trash humpers!!!! what is wrong with you retards!!!!oh yeah thats right.this is your job?mmmm.. :) pathetic.most of you say its so creeeeeeeeeppppyyyy, youre fucking creepy, you havent even seen it.are you jealous? cause im jealous of all of you dissing a movie with all your life that you havent even seen.
Posted by: gummochangedmylife at August 25, 2009 3:00 PM
actually im gonna watch it again right now
Posted by: gummochangedmylife at August 25, 2009 3:03 PM
It was you, wasn't it? You're the one who taped the bacon to the wall...
It was you this whole time.
Jacob Reynolds.
Posted by: Skitz at August 25, 2009 6:33 PM
I think it's funny that you think it sucks so much and yet you take all this time and effort to write about it. This is the problem with all of these blog movie "reviewers"- it's all about who can slam a movie with the most "clever" responses. Look at your comments- "I can't wait to hear you rip this"- I think regardless of what this movie is like you will just want to have everyone wait to hear you hate it. That's a shame- You aren't a real movie critic and you never will be. You are a nothing but an internet fad. REAL critics explain why they don't like a movie- they don't do what you do. You have no right calling yourself a fan of cinema. Regardless of what you think of Harmony Korine- he is doing what he wants to do and people watch it. What you are doing is spreading the word. He is making a living doing what he loves. Keep on writing and talking about him. Does nothing but gain an audience for him. Your site is a joke.
Posted by: Jimmy at September 14, 2009 2:28 PM
Video ads popping up after each page view? Try clearing your browser's cookies.
Oh my god, man, I can feel the wrath of Skitz from here....