Translating Mark Hamill's Diplomatic Statements About "Star Wars VII" Into Something Resembling the Truth
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Translating Mark Hamill's Diplomatic Statements About Star Wars VII Into Something Resembling the Truth

By Dustin Rowles | Trade News | May 7, 2013 | Comments ()


In an interview this week discussing his involvement with Star Wars VII, Mark Hamill -- who played Luke Skywalker in the original Star Wars trilogy -- said that he has not yet had any meeting with Kathleen Kennedy and Stephen Spielberg, the producers behind J.J. Abrams next Star Wars installment, due out in 2015. He did, however, share some thoughts about another Star Wars film, his involvement, and the talent behind the next series.

I have taken the liberty of translating his quotes into something that better approximates the truth.

"Part of me is cautious, saying 'let well enough alone, let everyone keep their nice memories if they have nice memories and don't try to go back and do it again.' But the other side of me, the adventurous side, thinks, 'if everyone's in, how could I miss this?'"

Translation: I don't have high hopes, and not even J.J. Abrams is likely to duplicate the magic of the original trilogy, but then again, if Harrison Ford and Carrie Fisher have already signed on to the ruination of their characters, I may as well cash a check, too."

"I want it to be age appropriate, so heavy on the Jedi mind tricks and lighten up on the lightsaber duels," he continues. "Let the kids do the heavy lifting."

Translation: Don't Christopher Nolan this beast, otherwise you'll alienate the under-13 crowd, and that means a smaller paycheck, which means fewer hoagies."

"There's nothing wrong with CGI, but I think you have to have a balance because the camera perceives the width and the depth and the weight of a miniature or a model."

CGI blows, and represents everything that is wrong with the prequels.

"It always starts with the script," says Hamill, "and that's why I'm so encouraged by Michael Arndt's involvement because I respect his writing so much. He's a big fan of these movies, so hopefully we can make something that doesn't make everyone want to find us, cut off our heads and throw it right in our faces."

Oh, thank God George Lucas is being kept as far away as possible for screenwriting duties. I barely know who Michael Arndt is but the fact that he's not George Lucas is the best thing to ever happen to Star Wars VII.

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Comments Are Welcome, Bigots and Trolls Are Not

  • Uriah_Creep

    CGI blows, and represents everything that is wrong with the prequels

    Really, Dustin, everyone I know agrees the prequels were done in by the atrocious writing.

  • Lauren_Lauren

    Wow, is he turning into Darth Hamill? Those are some serious eye bags.

  • ed newman

    OK, I know you didn't go this far L_L, but... We at Pajiba can't bag on his aging and at the same time bemoan all the actors and actresses that plasticize themselves with surgery in order not to age like Hamill.

  • How do you cut off someone's head and then throw it in their face? I'm not big on Star Wars, but I would pay to see that.

  • e jerry powell

    I love how adorably diplomatic he's being about the whole thing, especially that George Lucas has basically owned his ass since the mid-seventies.

  • Green_Eggs_and_Hamster

    The question is, are we ready for a Star Wars where Luke has so obviously been corrupted by the Dark Side? I really like Mark Hamill for many reasons, but he has a serious Emperor Palpatine look going in his photo's these days.

    Man, aging sucks.

  • googergieger

    "not even J.J. Abrams"

    He's terrible, and even if you say he is anything else as a joke, you're terrible too.

  • AvaLehra

    Skips FTW! (Seriously, Regular Show is the best.)

  • mograph

    “I want it to be age appropriate, so heavy on the Jedi mind tricks and lighten up on the lightsaber duels,” he continues. “Let the kids do the heavy lifting.”

    My interpretation: "I'm too old for that sh#t."

  • Vi

    Yeah, that was my interpretation too, not that he wanted it to be under 13 friendly. I mean honestly, this guy voiced the Joker for YEARS. If you were the hand wring-y 'think of the children!' type, I don't think voicing one of the most sadistic villains in batman backs up your case too well.

  • Stephen Nein

    This is why I like Hamill - compared to his co-stars and the usual Hollywood insanity, he's a breath of normalcy. Ford went arrogant Humbert & Carrie's never been normal. Of course, 30 years of career humility post-Star Wars can keep a guy pretty well grounded.

  • Between getting a cut of the gross of the original trilogy and a steady stream of voice work post-ROTJ, Hamill has done fairly well for himself artistically and financially.

  • The Replicant Brooke

    Hamill has actually had a good career post Star Wars, I think. Not in front of the camera, per se, but in voice work, production and whatnot.

  • Yup. I could not believe when I realized he was Fire Lord Ozai on Avatar: The Last Airbender (the cartoon, not that M. Night abomination.)

  • space_oddity

    Mark Hamill is the BEST Joker ever.

  • SnowMan

    Hell, throw some Joker makeup on him in that photo above, and he could easily move beyond voice acting to physically being the Joker.
    Perhaps in an adaptation of "The Dark Knight Returns"...

  • Kristen Mc

    Why is Mark Hamill in a William Shatner costume?

  • Long_Pig_Tailor

    Because William Shatner is Mark Hamill's father.

  • BWeaves

    Because they are going to do a crossover with classic Star Trek called "Retirement On Regulus" or "Tribbles and Droids."

  • culturerabble

    It's awesome to know that everyone involved knows that MASSIVE mistakes were made and that Lucas is being kept far far away. Lets keep it that way.

  • wonat G

    Not a good idea actually. if Lucas is kept away than jj abrams will stray farther away from what made Star Wars likable in the first place. he'll probably introduce time travel, have a "new" luke meet the older luke, have kids driving stolen sports cars, and will resurrect the emperor for the sake of creating a famous bad guy. keeping lucas away is not the problem.

  • Ghost of obi wan kenobi

    Actually, George WILL still be very very close to production, Jackass.

    He just won't write the script. But it's his overall story and his world. If you aren't happy with that, than shut up, watch your Ironmans, and let me watch the movies I'm excited to see.

  • Hey, anger leads to hate buddy. And we all know where hate leads...

  • jay

    Funny you should quote from... a prequel.

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