October 10, 2008 | Comments ()

By Dustin Rowles | Industry | October 10, 2008 |

I love a good creepy kid horror flick; unfortunately, good creepy-kid horror flicks are hard to come by, at least since Macaulay Culkin got all growed up. The problem with good creepy-kid flicks is that those poor kids go back to school and are teased mercilessly until they lash out and kill someone with their lunch box and then who gets all the blame? Sarah Palin, that’s who. And she deserves it, too.

Anyway, here’s the trailer for another creepy-kid movie. It comes from David Goyer, who wrote Batman Begins and The Dark Knight and quite a few films you’d prefer to forget about, except for Blade Trinity, which he also directed, and which is still, after all these years, Ryan Reynolds’ best role, even thought the movie itself was a big, scratchy pube hairball cough. It’s hard to tell what’s going on in the trailer for The Unborn, except it appears that at some point, a 7-year-old child emerges from a teenage girl’s cooter fully formed, which is kind of cool, and then there’s the twisted-up dude which makes my belly button flutter cause he looks like that woman from Pet Semetary crossed with a Guillermo Del Toro character. So, yeah, what I’m saying is: The Unborn is gonna blow, which is why Hollywood should stop writing abortion comedies. Also, Gary Oldman is in it, which must means it’s awesome, but it’s not. Bye!

Creepy Kids Don't Grow in the Womb, Silly. They Just Materialize.

I'm Feeling Gibberishy! / Dustin Rowles

Industry | October 10, 2008 | Comments ()

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