Pajiba

I found that way too amusing than I'd care to admit, so for the smoke and mirrors...

In middle school I had a teacher who was obsessed with Jean-Luc Piccard. And like, proud of it. She had a doll of him, which she proudly displayed for the entire class.

So obviously it was kidnapped, a lot. I'm pleading the fifth to my part in any of it, mind you, but it did get so intense that she had to create rules and boundaries for kidnapping the doll. Basically, no permanent damage could be done to it. That did not stop us... er, the class from dressing him up in lady clothes.

Also, there was one plot where someone who had stolen the doll sent a letter from him saying that his new fiance was coming to the class to stay while he got things ready for the wedding. Our teacher said she respected the dollar store Barbie knock-off that played the role of his fiance, but within three days of the dolls being there was wrapped in toilet paper and hung from the ceiling. She said students did it, but I have my suspicions.

Why don't people send their kids to public school more often?

No way a Faggoty Class could go up against a Super Star Destroyer like Vader's flagship.

NO. WAY.

*aHEM*

Here is a helpful picture I found on teh Googels to back up Slim's argument. I have to agree. Nerds already know it was the Executor in Star Wars. So tell me how the fuck that puny little shit-stain of an Enterprise is supposed to fight that.

I didn't think so.

I can't believe I'm saying this but, I've got to agree with BSlim. We all know that the Empire has superior ballistic ordinance at their disposal. And when you factor in all the different Tie craft the SSD could launch (Interceptors, Bombers and Fighters) Vader would have handed the Enterprise its ass before Picard ever got the chance to produce that smarmy shit eating grin. Bitch!

Pookie, please, just write an autobiography already. Every little nugget about your life is so fascinating it's like manna from heaven.

Totes not joking,
Your #1 Fan,
XOXOXOXO
K

I hate to say this but I agree with everything that fucking androgynous admin said. Along with the fact that Vader looks like a homo's wet dream walking around in that to die for black outfit which makes him look thin.

Seriously, Pookie, you crack me up, no joking.

Snath, I'm always intrigued by the people who actually work out the true to life sizings of these things. Do they have scale models in their basements? Is there a nifty little handbook?

How do you measure fake?

The encounter would play it out like this:

*as the the USS Enterprise and the Executor are prow to prow relative to each other*

On screen Mr. Worf, "This is Jean Luc Pic...BLAMMO!

Starship butt sex.

I don't know Kayanne, it could be completely made up for all I know. I just searched "super star destroyer" on Google and that's what came up. I imagine they have measurements in books or something they base it on.

And bravo Pookie, you've finally nailed me. It's exactly what I was going for.

I realize I am showing my nerd colors here, but did he say the shield had an output of 4.3 kilojoules? Because seriously, I run computer simulations on single molecules, and I get bigger energy values for pulling apart a freaking protein. 4 kJ wouldn't light a damn lightbulb. Damnit, now science has stolen Trek from me too.

Give me a Death Star with a side of Imperial Fleet. Hold the exhaust port.

S.Pisaster:

I just received a big (i.e. size of book) Cadbury Old Gold chocolate bar from my friend down in Australia. One serving (i.e. 1/8 of the candy bar) gives me 1070 Kj.

The shield has an output of 4.3 Kj. Hum? An 1/8 of my candy bar has way more power.

That was an awesome analysis Lordhelmet, but when do you find the time to feed the women that are changed up in your basement?

BWeaves, if you converted that from the calories on the label then I think I love you. Also, I seriously haven't been this disappointed in half-assed scifi science since Doc Brown mispronounced "gigawatts."

S.Pisaster:

Sorry, I did not convert that from the calories on the label. The candy bar is from Australia and it's actually labeled in Kj not calories.

Laugh it up, fuzzball.

Sure, inject yourself with a bunch of test tube midichlorians and expect to wield supreme executive power. That shit needs training, not to mention other innate personal qualities. What the hell do you think Yoda and Hogwarts are for? The ability to articially replicate microorganisms, even midichlorians, is insignificant. I'm sorry, but you do not understand the Force.

Thank-you Jay. It's unfortunate that some people cannot grasp the intricacies of rockin' the force.

And don't give me that shit helmet. Soong got Data practically perfect on his second try but he can't build a relatively simple microchip?

Next you'll try convincing me that building the Enterprise to separate was a great fucking idea.

And I live straddling the line between fact and fiction. I find it gives me an appropriate excuse for my more questionable behaviours.

It's not even a fair match up. It should be a match up between a borg cube and a SSD. Because what you're comparing is the most badass starship in starwars (save deathstar) compared to the most badass starship in the Federation, not in star trek.

No, The Doctor could defeat the Force, since he'd demonstrate that it was just science. Star Trek doesn't constantly make the metaphysical scientific like he does, so there's no reason for me to believe that the Federation would say "oh, it's nothing, just do this" and defeat Vader. And it's like the old question in the Chicago bar:

Is Ditka driving the bus?

Vader's driving the Star Destroyer, and Jean Luc ain't Han Solo. Plus, how many TIEs can be scrambled? A lot.

Hurry Lordhelmet! the cops are closing in on your secret lair. I think one of the girls escaped.

Ok you guys, I'm conflicted. I don't know anything about Trek, but everything you're saying makes me want to Wiki it because I'm getting such amusement from your comments that I want to know what my opinion might be.

This, however, breaks my heart because (and I don't want to ruin anything for you guys, but...) none of this is real. And I really should be doing more research for my final Senior Sem paper about the advent and evolution of Political Satire, but this is so ridiculously distracting...

Maybe I should give y'all wedgies and push you into a locker; Jay I'd threaten break your glasses, but you said one of my favorite Han quotes. Also, I was too much of a geek in high/middle/elementary school to ever be the bully, even with guise of the internet (I do not aspire to disprove or prove the Greater Internet Fuckwad Theory), even with the fact that the distraction quotient of this thread has gotten so high, it's mind boggling.

*sigh* Pajiba, you be awesome. But if I fail my last semester of college, I'm sending my parents to you.

The minute Jean-Luc is willing to off his own daughter because she wasn't willing to give up information about some bullshitting hideout, then we'll talk about who's more badass.

O.K. lordhelmet I will concede your point about the good doctor and his emotional detachment from the rest of humankind. However, I will not accept that there is no tactical advantage or disadvantage to detaching the saucer section.

The propulsion section is intended to be the primary battle vehicle during detachment. This leaves the saucer without adequate weaponry and incapable of warp speed.

This is almost akin to a lizard detaching its tail when attacked to create a diversion. But in this case the diversion is filled with most of the crew and civillians on board therefore becoming more of a target than the propulsion section. In a fight with more than one ship, the engine portion of the Enterprise would spend more time trying to defend the saucer section then blowing up bad guys.

It's just bad tactics and a bad idea for any type of battle scenerio. Which I seem to recall was when it was used in most instances.

And to hell with reality Kayanne, this is way more fun.

Gaaaahh! I'm all geeked out for the day. I love Star Trek by the way however now I'm going to go look at internet boobs. That's not geeky right?

Shit.

What's all this talk of Star Destroyers only containing lasers? They also possess ion-cannons which drain energy from shields, and some are equipped with gravity wells and tractor beams, which not only disable ships movement, but lightspeed/warp speeds as well...

And who's to say they haven't got proton torpedos and concussion missiles? Plan ahead I always say.

Ehh, admin when we call Lucas, can't we require that we write it. I mean, if he does it...

Well, all the zombies will be kids.

Be nice admin!

I'm forming an alliance with Pookie so you'd better not tease... Or completely remind me that if I'm not dead by December 15, my spirit may be. Ha. Good times. School sucks souls.

1. Wait? Did I miss the part were the 'Executor' shows up? It was a standard SD.

2. The Ent-D has 10 phaser banks, which can probably be individually targeted. TIE fighters have no shields, and even if the SD deploys the entire wing (72 TIEs), the Ent-D can obliterate them in seconds.

3. A SD could probably handle photon torpedoes. If it had the upgrade to quantum torps, then not so much. Especially if fired in a spread.

4. The SD would win by sheer mass: it can absorb a lot more punishment than the Ent-D.

5. There was a video done about this a couple years ago that was much better. This video, quite frankly, stank.

Um...

Death Star v. Borg Cube.

Wake me when it's done.

well to be honest i've read all of the above comments and fair enough this is now march so if anything this is the low blow after the final bell has rung but hey i had to discuss it all with my friends at work(no we're not all geeks but take an interest in the possible outcomes of random fights) for example would wolverines claws cut superman if superman were to stand still to test the theory...not an indea for a new thread. however if it comes to st vs sw then if it was ship versus ship star trek wins, size isnt everything if i recall thats a star wars thing so why are star wars fans screaming at how big the sd is.... bit of hypocrysy, now darth vader got owned thrice if am correct in the movies once by tyrannous once by obi wan and once by his own son so to use him as a marker aint good however ship versus ship was my point st everytime and when it comes to man versus man i'd take a jedi or sith over a random red shirt, plus lightsabres could cut through borg defences before you shout adapt..yes very intellectual and geeky but what ya say?