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The Spider-Man Reborquel Is Apparently Set in the Afterlife

By Dustin Rowles | Posted Under Trade News | Comments (26)

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From the looks of the halo-like glow on the new images from Andrew Garfield’s The Amazing Spider-Man, I guess the reborquel will be set in the afterlife. What’s with the heavenly glow. Is Spider-Man a metaphor for Jesus? I certainly hope this is not another one of those films that once promised to be darker and grittier in the vein of The Dark Knight because it looks like Spider-Man meets “Saved by the Bell.”

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(Via The Film Stage)









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Comments

In the spirit of the season, I'm not going to say anything negative about these images. Nor am I going to say that I think it's regoddamdiculous that they're telling the origin story again. Also not going to say I'm not going to see this.

Nope. Not gonna do it.

Happy Chrismuhankwaanzaka everybody!

Posted by: Groundloop at December 15, 2011 4:38 PM

these photos look like they're for a tv show.

Posted by: thesmedt at December 15, 2011 4:42 PM

Jesus titty-f***king Christ, Spiderman wears skinny jeans, lifestyle shoes and carries a skateboard strapped to his backpack. Who is the main villain going to be, a barista who made his cappuccino with insufficient foam?

Posted by: Tom at December 15, 2011 4:52 PM

Peter Parker never lifts his head up. It's like they're making the whole movie about Emo-Spidey from Spidey 3.

Hell, you can't even call this dude "Spidey".

Call this movie "Spider-Man: Twilight" and sell it to the tweens who have never read a Spidey comic.

Posted by: Meander at December 15, 2011 5:25 PM

In light of Meander's comment, I sincerely hope the sequel involves Spidey having to capture another radioactive spider to infect Gwen Stacy so that their abomination, eight-legged fetus can be born without harming the mother.

Posted by: professor_love at December 15, 2011 5:31 PM

This looks like absolute shit. But then again it looked like absolute shit six months ago. Nice to see the consistency.

Posted by: Barry at December 15, 2011 5:40 PM

Maybe Spider Man wasn’t built for the big screen, maybe it’s a tv series at best. I don’t care if the director is Spielberg or Lucas, all comic book superheroes can’t make the jump to the big screen. Maybe the Dark Knight made the transition because at the end of the day he was human, and we can relate to being human. Super Man was from another planet, people can’t relate to that. Spider Man got webs shooting out of his ass, and I know people can’t relate to that shit. I think we want to be able to relate to a person and be able to do what that person does on some level. That’s why it is so hard for Spider Man or Super Man to grab us like the Dark Knight has.

Posted by: Pookie at December 15, 2011 5:43 PM

I'm nominating professor_love for EE. And I'd pay to see that movie.

Posted by: MM at December 15, 2011 5:43 PM

Aside from the general off-ness of these photos, I can never get over how goddamn ordinary Emma Stone looks with blonde hair. It's like she's a different person (on the red carpet, in these photo stills, everywhere). Bizarre.

Posted by: noodlestein at December 15, 2011 5:44 PM

I guess the reborquel will be set in the afterlife

Well, yeah - there's Gwen and George Stacy right there.

Posted by: Duvall at December 15, 2011 5:50 PM

At least they got the GF right this time. Other than that it looks like spider-boy for the tweener crowd.

Posted by: logan at December 15, 2011 6:45 PM

I obsessively fill my DVR with Spider-Man cartoon reruns, and yet I can't muster the enthusiasm to comment usefully or even repetitively here. I agree with the above, though: nice comments quip about the dangers of the 8-legged baby.

Posted by: DarthCorleone at December 15, 2011 7:10 PM

@Pookie

Are you serious? Spider-Man not relatable!? He's the most relatable superhero of them all! He's the blueprint of every "superhero that could be you" ever made! He doesn't have billions of dollars like Bruce Wayne, and he isn't from another planet like Superman. He's a regular kid in school, with every day problems like the rest of us(school grades to keep up, work to pay the bills, relationship problems), just compounded by the fact that he also has super powers.

Posted by: Jeremy at December 15, 2011 8:15 PM

So, Peter's cool and hip now, not nerdy and introverted?

Posted by: Protoguy at December 15, 2011 9:55 PM

@Jeremy

Dude you’re Spider-Man, why are you worrying about grades or paying bills or some bitch that’s probably not even going to put out for you?

Posted by: Pookie at December 15, 2011 10:07 PM

There are times I think the excellence of "Batman Begins" was one the worst things to happen to Hollywood.

Posted by: Palaeologos at December 15, 2011 10:12 PM

i guess i understood where pooks was coming from. batman, even when stripped of his belt and goodies, is still a man who can beat your ass.
no powers, no matter how awesome, ring true in real life.
that's all he was getting at.


are we still jumping on pookie for every comment? i mean, i've rarely seen even his most benign comments not torn apart.

lighten up, we're talking about a spider-man reboot here. jeez.

Posted by: gp at December 16, 2011 12:38 AM

Those really are amateurish promo shots. Not just the photography, but yeah, that horrible halo effect and the really awful cut and paste job and the overblown saturation. Terrible. It does make me think this thing is going to be about as good as a Trek: Next Gen movie.

Posted by: Protoguy at December 16, 2011 4:19 AM

Jesus titty-f***king Christ, Spiderman wears skinny jeans, lifestyle shoes and carries a skateboard strapped to his backpack. Who is the main villain going to be, a barista who made his cappuccino with insufficient foam?

Posted by: Tom at December 15, 2011 4:52 PM

---------

This. EE please.

Posted by: zeke the pig at December 16, 2011 6:48 AM

The real villain in Spiderborque will be his emotions. He'll have to defeat sitting alone in his room in the dark cutting himself and writing terrible poetry.

Posted by: admin at December 16, 2011 8:46 AM

"Jesus titty-f***king Christ, Spiderman wears skinny jeans, lifestyle shoes and carries a skateboard strapped to his backpack. Who is the main villain going to be, a barista who made his cappuccino with insufficient foam?
Posted by: Tom at December 15, 2011 4:52 PM"

put that one in your 'Best Comments of The Week' wrapup Mr Pajiba

Posted by: Nick at December 16, 2011 2:31 PM

Wow, how much have they photoshopped Emma Stone in that second last photo?

Posted by: csb at December 16, 2011 6:17 PM

@protoguy--my thoughts exactly. The Peter Parker I know can barely dress himself. This kid looks like he stepped off the set of One Tree Hill. It's not like this is being rebooted for old time fans though. There's a whole new crop of Twi-twits to steal money from after all.

Heh, i don't visit the comments section as much as I used to, but I can see that Pookie is still reeling em in..

Posted by: stryker1121 at December 16, 2011 7:25 PM

I love Spiderman, but I don't think I can see a movie where Peter Parker is played by a Jean-Ralphio look-alike.

Posted by: mangrilla at December 16, 2011 10:03 PM

My brain tells me that second still "should" be Denis Leary but my eyes tell me that's the unholy love child of Crispin Glover & modern-day Tom Berenger with a dash of Ray Liotta thrown in for good measure.

Excess, thy name is Photoshop!

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