Pajiba

Why is it that monster movie monsters are invariably and inexplicably bulletproof? Other than, I guess, the movie would be much shorter otherwise.

I mean, when I smack a skeeter on my arm it makes a very satisfying crimson splat. There's no reason a man-sized version of the same wouldn't be just as vulnerable to rolled-up newspapers, much less automatic weaponry. Sheesh.

Manwhat? *watches 30 seconds of clip* W.T.F.

tamatha, I'm thinking bigass bugzapper. It's how they got rid of The Thing in the original. Or how about a really really big bat? Bats eat bugs, right? But then what would stop the giant bat? Maybe the Joker?

As a fan of this fine film, I will let you know that our hero goes "HEY MANSQUITO!" and when Mansquito turns and looks, the hero fires a rocket launcher at him.

tcfkab - at first I thought you meant a bat, like a baseball bat, which was a fine image. A giant, mammal bat is also cool, but not nearly as funny.

Optimus - really?

In the 80s, a heavy-metal LP was, like, a modern thing, a current menace in the minds of parents.

A remake might work if they still used an 80s heavy-metal vinyl LP and made it, like, an ancient artifact--kind of an update of the Antique Book of Forbidden Lore chestnut.

Like, the characters would have to dig around in the attic for a turntable to play it on, kind of shit. It might be fun that way.

(Sung to the tune of Hey Pachuco)

HEY MANSQUITO!

Just wanna fly free, Corin's gunnin' for me
Hot red blood for me toniiiiight.

I'm too lazy to come up with the rest.

Reading the Wikipedia article about Mansquito movie is the best thing I've done all day. For example, from the very first paragraph:

"The movie starts with a news reporter in Africa talking about the sudden outbreak of a new super virus called the West Nile Virus, the virus is spread by mosquitoes and this leads Dr. Jennifer Allen (Musetta Vander), a scientist, to come up with an experiment that could potentially kill the bacteria that creates the virus. Allen and her colleague find mosquitoes that have been infected with the virus and start to give them small doses of radiation, she explains to her friend that the levels have to be exact and if the mosquitoes receive too much radiation, the results could be more devastating than the virus itself."

Emphasis my own.

So..they could die? Because that's what happens when you get too much radiation. You don't suddenly mutate into a deadly creature. Your "mutation" is pretty much just limited to cancer, in the long term, if the dose is low enough and you've been exposed long enough. Otherwise your body shuts down, your organs fail, and you die a horribly slow, painful death.

I didn't realize that West Nile Virus (heee!) had the ability to enable super-mutation in people and insects. If that were truly the case, I think we'd all be fucked now. There are thousands of cases every year in the US alone.

This is one of my all time favorite guilty pleasure movies, the one that gave my friends and I the phrase "Stop Dorf-in around!!".
I mean, how will the kids even know they let the demons loose? They can't play the record backwards! There was an eye stabbing with a barbie doll leg! The minions made my ankles scared for years! Come ON!
Hollywood murders me a little more each day.

Ok, listen. Keannu. Pop quiz:

You're a guard. There's some kind of bloodsucking man-mosquito monster on the loose in the hospital, and all you've got is your trusty 9mm. You turn a corner and see the corridor strewn with the body parts of an entire SWAT team, who, despite being armed with combat shotguns and submachineguns, have been rapidly minced into spaghetti sauce.

What do you do?

Ya know, the plot of Mansquito sounds exactly like another movie called The Fly, I wonder where they got the idea, although in Mansquito the scientist, I guess, was just a fucking retard.

They can remake The Gate if they want but I REFUSE TO WATCH IT EVER!! EVVEEERRRRRRRR! How can you possibly top those claymation demons? You can't. Stop trying.

I couldn't agree more, because of the claymation, someone would have to be a fucking idiot to try and top the classic look of old films like that, like who the fuck would ever want to remake Evil Dead, or Clash of the Titans...ohhh wait.