Pajiba

i love the worst of the decade - i hope madonna takes it for both of her categories

I love how I know who killed me is "up" there with Battlefield Earth. Oooh I bet it burns, Lindsay. I bet it burns you and your entire whore family.

Worst EVERYTHING

Jar Jar Abrams' Star Shakeytrek

Special Mention:

18th tier website "Pajiba" for blatantly sucking on the Director's long, hard, veiny, cock.

SaBrina: You're thinking of Cast Away.

I think you're thinking of Cast Away, SaBrina. Swept Away was the horrible remake of a great old Italian movie of the same name, and it "starred" Madonna, for lack of a better term.

"Paris Hilton — The Hottie & The Nottie, House of Whacks, Repo: The Genetic Opera"

Hahahahaha.
I hope that was deliberate.
Genius.

I hope Transformers 2 wins for every category for which it was nominated. Fuck Michael Bay.

I don't think I've ever brought this to anyone's attention here, but you know what pains me most about Repo: The Genetic Opera? That two of my three beloved Love & Rockets boys were involved in the soundtrack. It hurts my heart.

Yeah, I'm going to have to second the choice of Rob Schneider as Worst Actor of the Decade, defeating even John Travolta and Eddie Murphy (although we must acknowledge the hideous dung-bomb that was Pluto Nash).

As for Worst Movie of the Decade, easily Battlefelch Earth. Easily.

Worst Actress of the Decade? Can we see J-Lo and Paris in a hot-oil death match to see who gets it?

Worsts of 2009 ... Hmm. Sweet Jesus in Jodhpurs, I haven't caught a whiff of anything this nasty since I had to deal with a guy who was explosively soiling himself. They're so bad I can't make a choice.

are the comments for Caprica permanently broken?

The fact that she only needed one movie to get nominated for worst of decade truly speak the level of suck Mariah is at acting. It should teach us all that if you got one gold going for you, you better not push for an another lest everybody forget what made you glitter in the first place and see you for a pair of boobs attached to a loony you've become.

Wow, worst picture of the decade is brutal.

I wish Rob Schneider and Paul Schneider didn't have the same last name.. Whenever I tell people that Paul Schneider is one of my favourite actors, people look at me like I'm a fucking idiot =(

Anybody else watch Bright Star? He was so damn good. Watch that and Assassination of Jesse James back to back. Amazing.

Oh, I got sidetracked.. Fuck Rob Schneider, is what I meant to say.

Battlefield Earth...by far is the worst film of the decade. None of those other films gets every single thing wrong. Battlefield Earth gets nothing right...at all. No bullshit, about a week ago, I had a get together at my apartment and I busted out the DVD. A couple of people had never even heard of the film. So we played a game were we all shouted "Wipe" and downed a beer every time they did a scene wipe (which is every in between every goddamn scene). What I forgot however, is that the camera angles in this god awful flick are so fucking disorienting and bad so you should never drink and watch this crap. Its like drinking on a roller coaster. We didn't even get through half the film before we all stopped because none of us were feeling well. Even with everyone no longer drinking, by the end of the film, I had two or three people go outside to puke. We were literally taking smoke breaks as people got too sick to continue.

Everyone owes it to themselves to watch that flick once every 5 years or so...just to remind you how dark...evil...and just terrifying humanity can be...

Steve Martin, Pink Panther 2
Eddie Murphy, Imagine That

It makes me sad how deserving these two men are of this list, because once upon a time, I saw them as comedic gold (blame my father). They have sunk so low.

Oh, and popejenn, I lurve it as well. I saw it in the theater, and I seriously messed myself. I still call my college roommate and scream, "SALT AN PEP SALT AN PEP SALT AN PEPPAS HERE!"

Rob Schneider hasn't done anything for movie-dom, but he's one helluva power bottom.

Umm. or so I've heard.

I have to ask, was GI Joe really that awful? I didn't see it, but the general reviews I heard was that it was just lame, but not the worst film of the year.

And I can't believe Murphy fucking Brown is nominated for a Razzie. That just hurts my heart.

Hey, hey, hey, don't knock Schneider. Remember that time he played a pedo on Veronica Mars? Yeah, he pulled that shit off. That was a fuckin' contribution.

Are you thinking of Steve Guttenberg? I think you are.

how dare you!!!!!!!! you r a monster new moon was amazing and taylor lautner is a very very very good actor!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! why did you nominate him???????????!!!!!!!!!????????!!!!!!!!!!!??????????????????!!!!!!!!!!!!

I don't know if making people watch Battlefield is a good idea. I remember my sister was dragged to it by an old boyfriend, and well...how many relationships have to die on the thetan altar? Does Xenu truly will it to be so?

I'm not convinced that there will be a lot of a Razzing of the Travolta-Preston household, what with the still-recent loss of their young son. Yeah, yeah, I know, he was still (deservedly) nominated, and because I hate joy, I despise both Saturday Night Fever and Grease--because I hate joy. Still, though...*shrug* Then again, he does have his Scientology goons out stumping in Haiti so fuck that noise to hell. He has to be John Travolta, that's pretty dispiriting.

I doubt that it will be given to Mariah, as her career and personal life have rebounded in the intervening years. It just seems like Mimi's got so much batshit-nuts in her future, that one film's turning into a footnote. You know that in a fortnight she'll release some sort of ode to a cross-dressing pants-free peninsula and Eminem will be involved somehow. Glitter seems destined to live on more in legend than actual memory, since the reality of her crazy far outswims anything she could do in fiction. That's mythology though, I mean, was there ever REALLY a King Arthur? If we're going to make fun of anyone in that film, mock Eric Benet: The Has-Been Who Never Was.

Lohan's like kicking a whore when she's down. Okay, okay I'm not that mean, I just couldn't pass it up. But it seems like they're kind of softball-ing it with the choices. If they were truly committed to Razzing her, they probably should've added Pregnancy Bumps, or whatever it was, and 'The One with Jane Fonda'. Heck, in the 'Fully Loaded' days, most of the jokes pointed towards her bra size and not a toxicology report--though she was well on her way at that point.

Truth Time: I've never seen a Bond film, but the addition of Madonna in that film seems like an odd choice. Wasn't it just a quick cameo, if memory serves? Heck, I would have forgotten that she had had any involvement in it all save for that unforgivable 'Die Another Day' song. *Queaze!* Is it to remind us that she was in something more recently than eight years ago? It just seems like the resume is a little thin to qualify for an Anything of the Decade. I had totally forgot about The Next Best Thing though, what with the American Beauty juggernaut (oy, I don't even have the energy) taking up all of the attention. I wonder if Madge the Vadge and Sad Ru-Ru ever talk between bouts of horrifying plastic surgery?

I haven't even heard of half of the Eddie Murphy selections. Perhaps that is the greatest Razz of all. Nice about your last daughter though, you milk-tooted little troll bitch.

Schneider: I don't care if you're half Filipino, that yellowface shit didn't work for Mickey Rooney, Peter Sellers, Krusty the Klown or you. And remember that it was Krusty who made Jay Leno look like a class act by comparison. Send this 'Office Guy' to the lime caves, I say. I'll send Zamfir to seal him up later. There, he will be forced to watch another forthcoming, and until now secret remake of Caligula in XXXTreme 3-D...XXX. This will continue until I deem him, 'even more deficient'.

Starring: Divine
Late-Period Raymond Burr
The Sentient Glass Eye of Columbo
The Uppercut of Orson Welles
Schneider of, 'One Day a Time'
(A Schneider you can scarcely abide)
A Recently-Found Girdle of Mae West's

...and the rest.

Although, Welles is probably glad that these new Transformers films have taken the heat off. That's their only useful function.

As for Hilton: first the LASIK, then the Paris Hilton Film Festival. Now that she'll see it, she'll have to believe it. Not for all of the melatonin and ketamine in the world could a person calm down from that shock. *wink*. Or actually, *wink...?*

Jennifer Lopez, I challenge you to a race around the world against Michael Phelps. El Terrible.

Bennifer Affleck, I challenge you to a race around the world against your hairline. Also, you married a pot of porridge.

Beyonce: I challenge you to a race around the world against your champion weave horse, Sasha Fast. It's hard to run when you're a mermaid, isn't it?

Miley and Billy: I sentence you to a ten-year spotlight dance wherein the only music played will be supplied by the Taylor Swift 'Pony Pretty Party Closed-Mouth Kiss Dance Mix (with Prom Hair!)' Box Set.

Whoever said that Bradley Cooper looks like an emu is correct and needs to give me the name of a support group. And is this one of Bullock's 'tight-lipped prig' or 'sell it with a snort' hayseed roles?

Oh Steve Martin, if you only had half of the panache of Gavin Volure these days! John Slattery's in the wings, I'll see you to coat check.

Mike Myers is now probably holed up in a light-deprived crevasse researching the detailed and scarring history of the gulags and toppling any minors or commissary workers who stand as obstacles to his opus in order to form his newest lovable character, 'Piotr the Productive Siberian Poop'. Aided by one of Stalin's saddest henchmen, 'Gyorgy Father Strongman: Melancholy and Remorseless', the duo bring light and laughter to the vitamin-deficient faces of the political prisoners and insufficiently taciturn fishwives around them. Get ready to 'Steppe Lively'! A-ha-ha-ha!

GYORGY: Hey Piotr the Productive Siberian Poop, what's that bourgeois-looking brown line in the snow heading into the direction of the decadent west?

PIOTR: Why Gyorgy, that's 'Trot-ski'!

A-ha-ha-ha. And then everybody died.

As for the rest, take your money and fame and youth, your adulation and your beauty and then go! Go you, you FAILURES!

***

Ah, that's better.

extreme book you take

Samp. Nay, as they dare. I will bite my thumb at them; which is

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