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Television News That Will Make You Yell WYLD STALLYNS RULE! Or Not.

By Jodi Clager | Trade News | December 5, 2012 | Comments ()


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Tim Taylor's youngest son has been convicted of DUI and hash possession. You know, the one that married the woman much, much older than him. Taran Noah Smith. Name still isn't ringing a bell, is it? Anyway, Smith was sentenced to 12 hours in a program for the DUI and 6 months in a drug-diversion program for the hash. If he were still famous, it would be a 12 minute DUI program and the drug program would be dropped because of overcrowding. Unrelated: those are some of the deadest eyes I've ever seen.

In other child star news, Frankie Muniz of "Malcolm In The Middle" suffered a mini-stroke on Friday. There's no joke here, kids. That's just straight up terrifying since Muniz is 26.

This next news about Jamie Foxx's show for TNT? I can't even with it, so I'll just post the description here:

"

Hit centers on two former high school football teammates and best friends -- one a QB, one a WR -- who years later are "drafted" by the Miami P.D. and assigned to HIT (High Impact Team). The same shorthand that made them unstoppable on the gridiron makes them great partners taking down the most dangerous criminals in the city."

If there isn't a recurring moment in the show where the QB throws an improvised weapon at a criminal and the WR catches something besides herpes, I will burn Utica to the ground.
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AMC has picked up a Midwestern militia pitch from Bill S. Preston, Esq., AKA Alex Winter. See, the militia pitch could be something that wide receiver in the last item catches. Anyway, the proposed drama, tentatively called "Rights Of Bill", would center around a sheriff in Wisconsin that forms his own militia. Hmm.
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Michael "I'M NOT A RACIST!" Richards is set to star alongside Kirstie "*insert crazy noises here*" Alley and Rhea Perlman in TV Land's "Giant Baby". Alley is a Broadway star that the son she gave up for adoption come back into her life. Richards will be Alley's limo driver. Perlman is her assistant and friend. This sounds terrible.

Sean Bean is going to star in "Legends" on TNT. I would guess that he won't be killed off in this series, but you never know. Bean will play "Martin Odum (Bean), a deep-cover operative who has an uncanny ability to transform himself into a different person for each job."

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Finally, FOX is adding to their animated line-up with "Murder Police". Surprisingly, it isn't from Seth MacFarlane, but from David A. Goodman ("Family Guy") and Jason Ruiz. So just MacFarlane -adjacent. Ruiz will voice, as will Will Sasso ("Family Guy"), Horatio Sanz ("SNL", Wreck-It Ralph), Penny Marshall (LAVERNE!), and Chi McBride ("Pushing Daisies", "Boston Public"). Look for it in 2013.







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Comments Are Welcome, Bigots and Trolls Are Not


  • Aaron Schulz

    The matter of fact, this sounds terrible, at the end of that michael richards show description was awesome.

  • dizzylucy

    "If there isn’t a recurring moment in the show where the QB throws an
    improvised weapon at a criminal and the WR catches something besides
    herpes, I will burn Utica to the ground."
    Best thing I've read all day.

    Top picture = creepy. I feel like I'm getting acne just looking at it.

  • TheAggroCraig

    Wait, is "Rights of Bill" going to be about a grown-up Bill S. Preston as the sheriff? Please say yes.

  • BendinIntheWind

    My biggest disappointment about "Murder Police" is that it's not actually a reference to John Mulaney's "Law and Order" bit; for a brief, glimmering second, I thought someone had hired him to do a procedural parody. He should talk to Adult Swim - they've already got "Childrens' Hospital" and "NTSF:SD:SUV", they could use a good fake detective show.

  • BWeaves

    Bean will play "Martin Odum (Bean, Dept. of Redundancy Dept.), a deep-cover operative who has an uncanny ability to transform himself into a different person for each job.”

    Isn't this the same show Brendan Frazer was supposed to star in?

    Then again, having the "uncanny ability to transform himself into a different person for each job” is akin to dying, since it's probably some other actor playing the part, and Bean will just peel off a rubber mask at the end of each show.

  • Exactly. Bean dies in every episode. Genius. Although I'd go for the Scooby Doo ending idea as well.

  • KatSings

    Bean will play “Martin Odum (Bean), a deep-cover operative who has an
    uncanny ability to transform himself into a different person for each
    job.”

    So...The Pretender, except with black ops?

  • Cody M.

    I was actually thinking Human Target (the source material), but I also like your idea.

  • Blake

    " a deep-cover operative who has an uncanny ability to transform himself into a different person for each job."

    So they are finally making a "The Master of Disguise / Harry Crumb" TV show?

    Side Note: Does his "uncanny ability to transform himself into a different person" include African Americans, Hispanics, Asians or Women?

  • Fabius_Maximus

    You mean like this?

  • Natallica

    Second side note: Does than mean they've actually managed to cross Ned Stark with Jaqen H'ghar?

  • BlackRabbit

    That top picture is just too disturbing.

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