Take Your Stinking Paws Off Me, You Damn Dirty Movie Studio!
20th Century Fox is pressing ahead with its Planet of the Apes prequel, Rise of the Apes (tentative release date: June 24, 2011). As if this weren't enough of a bad idea in the first place, they've decided to go with CG apes. WHAT? WHAT? WHAT?
I'm sorry, but everything in my body just revolted and the bile that rose up (pun intended) is getting mailed to whomever is in charge of this monstrosity. Sure, we all know the machine is going to keep on churning out the remakes and the prequels, and some of you out there may even have kept an open mind about this idea. OK by some of you, I mean, me. But part of the intrigue of any PoTA film is seeing that connection between man and ape; the expressions of the actors beneath the make-up just can't be conveyed realistically by CG representations. Sure, if you need to show a large group of apes running through the brush, go for it. But up close and individually? You may as well make this animated.
The official synopsis: "Rise of the Apes is an origin story in the truest sense of the term. Set in present day San Francisco, the film is a reality-based cautionary tale, a science fiction/science fact blend, where man's own experiments with genetic engineering lead to the development of intelligence in apes and the onset of a war for supremacy."
I don't care that they're using WETA Digital or that Rupert Wyatt ("The Escapist") is directing, just bring me my barf bag NOW.