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I Don't Know My Way Home.

By TK | Posted Under Trade News | Comments (26)



straw-dogs4.jpg

There’s some pain found in this one little post, and now it’s hard to keep from punching the monitor.

Soooo. Being something of a giant Peckinpah dork, I was filled with a seething murderous rage dismayed to learn that Screen Gems is remaking 1971’s Straw Dogs. For those who haven’t seen it, go rent it. Right now. I’ll wait. It’s a particularly brutal movie, in Peckinpah’s violent, twisted, misogynistic way. It’s also an incredibly good movie. It’s also a movie that I don’t need repeated viewings of, despite my Peckinpah worship. And it’s now being remade.

Now, ignoring the absolute lack of a need to remake such a seminal work, all is not necessarily lost. Rod Lurie, a very capable director who has done some brilliant work (2000’s The Contender jumps to mind), has been tasked with writing and directing, so it will hopefully just be disturbing and frightening, but not necessarily exploitative. It’ll be interesting to see how he handles the lurid subject matter, particularly a series of distinctly disturbing and controversial rape scenes (that Ranylt and I once spent an entire afternoon discussing).

The casting, however… not so much. The film is about a hapless Hollywood screenwriter (to be played by James Marsden — it was Dustin Hoffman playing a mathematician in the original) who moves to his wife’s hometown in Mississippi. The wife will be played by Kate Bosworth. OK, now look. Bosworth’s pretty enough — a decent compliment to Susan George, who played the original role. And I thought Blue Crush was enjoyable summer candy. But she’s not exactly an acting juggernaut, and this is a role that, believe me, calls for one. Bosworth simply lacks the chops for this particular role.

Alexander Skarsgård (“True Blood”) will play her high school boyfriend (played by Del Venney in the original) who sees her arrival as a second chance, only he’s a little bent — but not quite as bent as some of the others in the town.

At the end of the day, this is just another remake that is simply unnecessary. It’s not like the original is a greatly flawed picture that will benefit from a remaking. And seriously — Marsden’s a likable actor, but how in the bughumping fuck is he going to compete with Dustin freaking Hoffman? Tell me that? TELL ME!

Goddamn you, Hollywood.









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Comments

Alexander Skarsgård

...I'll watch it.

Posted by: Julie at July 17, 2009 10:33 AM

I.
WILL.
MURDER.
EVERYONE.

Posted by: gp at July 17, 2009 10:36 AM

What sort of dirty information does Kate Bosworth have on the top honchos in Hollywood?

There is simply no explanation for her gaining paid work without some bribery and corruption on her part.

Posted by: missh at July 17, 2009 10:48 AM

i cuss (even in writing) about twice a year.

FUCKING remakes!!!

Posted by: dg at July 17, 2009 10:48 AM

ugh.

Posted by: celery at July 17, 2009 10:50 AM

gp,
Start with child molestors and rapists. By the time you get to awesome dinner guests, my category, I can have my yard work done. Because if I don't finish it, you'll be beaten to the punch by my death via my wife incessantly berating me for being a lazy, useless asshole.

Posted by: Kballs at July 17, 2009 10:51 AM

That's a great question, missh. I don't get it at all either.

So I guess I should see this one before the remake comes out. I don't think I've even heard of this one before. But then, I've never any of Peckinpah's work. I'm like your worst nightmare when it comes to movies, huh, TK?

Posted by: MelBivDevoe at July 17, 2009 10:53 AM

"I'm like your worst nightmare when it comes to movies, huh, TK?"

You and that fuckin' Julie.

Posted by: TK at July 17, 2009 10:54 AM

So they've finally gotten around to remaking the old "fascist work of art", eh? That the original cast virtually every townsperson as a yokel or outright reTARD makes Mississippi the natural Hollywood stand-in for Cornwall, I suppose.

Given that Susan George basically played a petulant flirt (with the exception of the harrowing task of embodying Peckinpah's sick perpetuation of the rape myth), I think Bosworth might be up to it. Not being a stick figure would help with some of the male characters' motivations, though.

Posted by: sansho1 at July 17, 2009 10:55 AM

Mississippi?

Doesn't that just make the setup really cliched?

Marsden? This is more Joseph Gordon Levitt-y. It was kind of the point that it's this Dustin Hoffman-type guy, right?

Oh well, no one has to watch it.


Posted by: Jay at July 17, 2009 10:59 AM

Speaking of the polysyllabic one, where is Ranylt? And when will she be reviewing the just-published Werner Herzog Diaries? PLEASE!

Posted by: PaddyDog at July 17, 2009 11:02 AM

In my defense, he's very pretty.

Posted by: Julie at July 17, 2009 11:06 AM

Skarsgård seems too nice, even though he is kind of intimidating. I don't see him as a rapist.

Posted by: Snath at July 17, 2009 11:20 AM

I guess I should add to that and say that yes, I watch True Blood. So maybe I see him as a powerful vampire that can fuck some people up, but not as a rapist. He's too clean.

Posted by: Snath at July 17, 2009 11:22 AM

Completely unnecessary.Fuckers.

There’s some pain found in this one little post, and now it’s hard to keep from punching the monitor.

I would suggest punching said monitor except for the fact that you will probably damage yourself more than the monitor.

Posted by: admin at July 17, 2009 11:54 AM

If there was ever a time when a zombie apocalypse was required, it's now, if only so Peckinpah could rise from the grave, shamble onto the set of this unnecessary (and ultimately PG-13 rated) piece of detritus, and devour everyone involved.

What's next, a toned-down remake of The Wild Bunch, featuring an MTV soundtrack and enough jump-cuts to render the film incomprehensible to anyone save the no-attention-span youth that these films seem to be geared toward?

Posted by: David at July 17, 2009 12:03 PM

"What's next, a toned-down remake of The Wild Bunch, featuring an MTV
soundtrack and enough jump-cuts to render the film incomprehensible to
anyone save the no-attention-span youth that these films seem to be
geared toward?"

Jesus, shut UP!! THEY HAVE EYES EVERYWHERE!

Posted by: TK at July 17, 2009 12:14 PM

Wait, I thought Hollywood already remade this.. wasn't Home Alone loosely based on Straw Dogs? A mild mannered young man is driven to a violent and shocking confrontation in which he defends his home against intruders? Sure they cut the rape scene and took a few creative liberties but the third act is essentially the same.

Posted by: Yossarian at July 17, 2009 2:33 PM

Fuck a bunch of Eloquent Eloquence. Yossarian's comment is my favorite of the week.

Posted by: TK at July 17, 2009 2:35 PM

I second that TK.

Rod Lurie, your remake...woof.

Posted by: becks at July 17, 2009 3:47 PM

I guess I should add to that and say that yes, I watch True Blood. So maybe I see him as a powerful vampire that can fuck some people up, but not as a rapist. He's too clean.

I'm just wondering how he is the most popular actor in Sweden. I mean his role in "True Blood" renders him kind of emotionless (I'm thinking the scene in the first season where we first get to see what happens when a vampire gets a stake through the heart). Maybe he's got more depth then I can see, kind of like Michael C. Hall in "Dexter." Although, I guess they would have the sadistic nature of a rapist down. I haven't seen this movie, but everytime I think of a rap scene I Spit On Your Grave pops into my head...come to think of it, so does A Clockwork Orange.

Posted by: DeistBrawler at July 17, 2009 5:11 PM

DeistBrawler: If you haven't seen Generation Kill yet it's more than worth your time. You may get a fuller understanding of Alexander Skarsgård's acting as well. He is also extremely understated in that performance (like in TB) but I think the nuances are quite beautiful.

That, and he is so hot it makes me want to get a divorce and stalk a Swede.

Posted by: Clarence Boddicker at July 17, 2009 5:51 PM

I don't think remakes are being done because the original was inadequate, but because the big kahunas, string-pullers and et cetera don't have the balls/imagination to pull off something unique and equally awesome.

"This story was cool before, but wait til you see it with a little CGI and some extended titty shots!"

Is that the harbinger of the end times I hear? I think so, though I'm disappointed that there are no zombies.

Posted by: Edwina the Magnificent at July 17, 2009 11:56 PM

Where were you all when they remade Pelham?

Do we really need to shed tears for one of the fathers of torture porn?

Posted by: Janis at July 18, 2009 8:02 PM

"Do we really need to shed tears for one of the fathers of torture porn?"

Oh. Oh, honey. That was just tragically misinformed.

Posted by: Skewicide Blonde at July 18, 2009 11:40 PM

All I just saw...was torture...and porn...I'll be in my bunk.

Posted by: DeistBrawler at July 19, 2009 3:40 AM