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Because you’re a cunning prohibisionist, alright? / Seth Freilich

Trade News | December 3, 2008 | Comments (48)

Martin Scorsese has a drama pilot in the works for HBO, “Boardwalk Empire,” which is going to focus on the growth of Atlantic City in the 1920’s. Needles on the beech, trashy skanks with big hair, and senior citizens as far as the eye can see — this is where it all started!

And Steve Buscemi is currently in talks to take on the role of Nucky Johnson, who the HR describes as “a cunning businessman who runs a liquor distribution ring at the onset of Prohibition.” Buscemi’s no stranger to HBO, of course, having played the inevitably-fated Tony Blundetto in 16 episodes of “The Sopranos.” And I think he’ll be perfect for this show because (a) he’s a talented motherfucker, and (b) he’s an ugly motherfucker. And if 1920’s AC is anything like modern-day AC, it’s full of ugly motherfuckers.

Which is why I’m torn about the fact that Kelly Macdonald is also in talks to star on the show as an Irish immigrant. She’s also a talented motherfucker. But she ain’t ugly. She’s one of my oldest crushes, hewing back to her Trainspotting days, and she’s far too purty for AC. And more importantly, her hair’s not even close to big enough.


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Comments

She seems like a nice girl but um, how do I put it? Kelly Macdonald is definitely ugly enough to work in Atlantic City. I'm not a girl that throws ugly around either but let's call a spade a spade. She's quirky at best.

I'll give you that compared to Buscemi she's Adriana Lima.

Posted by: becks at December 3, 2008 8:56 AM

You know, everybody talks about how ugly Steve Buscemi is... It makes me just wanna give him a hug if I ever see him.

But I'd hope he wouldn't stare too hard with his googley eyes.

Posted by: Kayanne at December 3, 2008 8:58 AM

Wow! This could be an awesome show. The world needs to know how Atlantic City became one of the world centers of sadness

Posted by: Park at December 3, 2008 9:33 AM

My only concern would be how good are the Scottish at playing Irish?

>i>Kelly Macdonald is definitely ugly enough to work in Atlantic City.

Woman, you just don't know when to quit with the slanderous crazy talk.

Posted by: Jay at December 3, 2008 9:34 AM

Anyone else thinking that THIS should have been the Monopoly movie?

Posted by: Vermillion at December 3, 2008 9:36 AM

They're both awesome. I am super pumped about this.

Posted by: K at December 3, 2008 9:37 AM

Dammit, you've got me so offended I can't html right! You pale-ist!!!

Posted by: Jay at December 3, 2008 9:37 AM

Yea, becks I have to disagree... Kelly MacDonald is super cute. No one that adorable could be described as "Atlantic City Fug."

Posted by: Kayanne at December 3, 2008 9:41 AM

Really Becks? I think MacDonald is super pretty. I wanted to be her in The Girl in the Cafe...but that may be because I have the hots for Bill Nighy.

And I've said it before and I'll say it again, Buscemi is appealing in his own special way.

Posted by: Julie at December 3, 2008 9:44 AM

I think she's pretty average by real people standards and ugly by Hollywood standards. If you have that many people working on you to make you look attractive and you come out looking like Kelly Macdonald then you aren't good looking.

Plus I'm no pale-ist. I'm Canadian for God sakes!

Posted by: becks at December 3, 2008 9:46 AM

and ugly by Hollywood standards

Fuck that shit.

Posted by: Kayanne at December 3, 2008 9:47 AM

I'm really not trying to be mean. I like her. I loved her in No Country. I just think she's not attractive. Maybe I haven't seen her in the movies that y'all have seen.

Posted by: becks at December 3, 2008 9:49 AM

Count me in for thinking Kelly MacDonald is really pretty.

Posted by: Roni at December 3, 2008 9:56 AM

I'm with you becks, she's very talented but does nothing for me in the rowwwwr department.

Posted by: admin at December 3, 2008 10:00 AM

Pimping ain't easy, is it HBO? You thought you could lose "The Wire," "Deadwood," and "The Sopranos." In addition, turn around and try to feed the masses "John from Cincinnati," and "In Treatment" and how did that little experiment work out? You thought motherfuckers was going to go along with that shit. I told you a long time ago HBO, that once "The Wire" ended I was not going to be fucking with you, and the only way you could keep me as a viewer was if you broadcasted "Cathouse" twenty-four hours a day. Finally, you have come to your senses by bringing in Martin "The Don" Scorsese.

Posted by: Pookie at December 3, 2008 10:03 AM

Ahem, Mr. Rowles:

"Which is why I'm torn about the fact that Kelly Macdonald is also in talks to star on the show as an Irish immigrant. She's also a talented motherfucker. But she ain't ugly."

Since you are not prone to non sequiturs, your no doubt well-thought through use of consecutive sentences here strongly suggests that an Irish immigrant must de facto be ugly. So before I call the IRA cousins (you know they don't have much to do these days so they've been looking for a challenge) and unleash my wrath, you might want to clear up this little misunderstanding. Thanks.

Posted by: PaddyDog at December 3, 2008 10:15 AM

Hey, I've got a long memory, and the painful memories of The Ten Most Unusually Hot Celebrity Women will never fade.

NEVER! THAT GOES FOR ALL YOU OTHER CRAZIES TOO!!!

Though I'm still with you on Eva Mendes.

Posted by: Jay at December 3, 2008 10:16 AM

becks & admin granted, she doesn't have to tickle your fancy, but I hate the implication that just because she's not up to Hollywood standards of beauty she's unattractive.

Also, does anyone know how involved Scorsese is with this project? Is he exec producing the whole series, or will he direct the pilot and then leave it be.

Eh, not that my opinion matters, I don't have HBO anyway.

Posted by: Kayanne at December 3, 2008 10:17 AM

Jay, I feel like insulting Jennifer Tilly and Tina Fey right now. Just to mess with you for funsies.

Posted by: Julie at December 3, 2008 10:29 AM

Kayanne, I heartily agree. I think Kelly MacDonald is adorable. I have no need for her to be "Hollywood hot" because she also seems to actually be a good actress. It took me about a week after seeing No Country to realize that she was the little maid who got kissed by Clive Owen in Gosford Park.

Posted by: Anne (in Reno) at December 3, 2008 10:34 AM

she was the little maid who got kissed by Clive Owen in Gosford Park.

Gosford Park--now that's a movie I should see again. I really liked it, and now I know even more of the actors.

I'm sorry becks and admin, I am officially accusing you of smoking crack, because Kelley MacDonald is lovely.

Not that you aren't entitled to your own opinions or anything.

Posted by: tamatha at December 3, 2008 10:40 AM

Julie, pweeeze don't make fun of Tina Fey looks-wise, even if it was to mess with Jay... it'd make my heart hurt.

I think Kelly MacDonald is adorable. I have no need for her to be "Hollywood hot" because she also seems to actually be a good actress.

Anne (in Reno) that's what I like to hear! She's super cute, but I don't care if she doesn't "do it" for you. She looks decent on camera and she does a good job while she's up there. Unfortunately, too many people expect "Hollywood Hot" out of all their actresses, regardless of the outcome. Those are the people I blame for giving us Jessica Alba. Talent doesn't always come in scorching hot packages.

Posted by: Kayanne at December 3, 2008 10:43 AM

Yeah, I never said that she should be hot. I said that she isn't hot and that I like her anyway.

Posted by: becks at December 3, 2008 10:44 AM

Kayanne how can you not have HBO, isn't that like against the law or something? Are you a socialist or something, where do you get your entertainment? Please don't tell me you are one of those people that enjoy reading books and shit?

Posted by: Pookie at December 3, 2008 10:47 AM

Hee, I'm just being antagonistic Kayanne, if I were a guy I'd happily risk breaking Fey's signature glasses by furiously banging her against the wall.

Posted by: Julie at December 3, 2008 10:51 AM

I agree that McDonald is quite attractive but has anyone ever see her play a character who wasn't outwardly rather helpless and innocent but with an inner canniness? And now she'll be an innocent immigrant thrust into the wiles of Atlantic City. Just sounds like more of the same to me. It wears thin after a while.

Posted by: PaddyDog at December 3, 2008 10:53 AM

Hey, when a man loves a woman he'd turn his back on his best friend if he put her down, Julie.

And was that Jezebel story on Tina Fey kinda straw-grasping? They act like she hasn't looked pretty much the same throughout her 30s, and well before her current level of fame, and also forgot the Bust photoshoot that has never been forgotten by anyone else from five, six years ago. Apparently she was suddenly transformed a few weeks ago and "sexed up" and it's kinda shameful and oh my god she looked different fifteen, twenty years ago, and we have the pictures to prove it!

Whaa?

Posted by: Jay at December 3, 2008 10:59 AM

Totally Jay, I remember when her and Jimmy Fallon (heh) were featured in People's 50 Most Beautiful list about 5/6 years ago and she looked just as pretty in that photoshoot.

Posted by: Julie at December 3, 2008 11:04 AM

Kelly McDonald is lovely. I'd certainly dehydrate her.

Posted by: KC at December 3, 2008 11:11 AM

Aw, man. I was born in Atlantic City and I never thought I was doomed to fugliness... my hair is extra thick and looks kind of big even if I flat iron it, though.

Crap. Now I have to start wearing a bag over my head.

Posted by: PaleoLithchick at December 3, 2008 11:16 AM

PaddyDog,

I believe our esteemed Mr. Freilich was referring NOT to the ugliness of the Irish but the inherent ugliness of the denizens of Atlantic City, whatever their national origin may be.

Posted by: Jen Vegas at December 3, 2008 11:18 AM

Pooks I am not a socialist! Psshaw to that. Actually, I'm a broke college student living off-campus (on-campus has cable but I got conned into moving off-campus by my nagging roommate) and with money being tight all around... Well, one of my roommates (the roommate that also conned me into moving off-campus and I happen to be a bride's maid for) can barely afford the bills, so I suggested we get rid of cable.

I have the networks, WGN, TBS and VH1 classic. It's kind of depressing, but I was catching up on watching a bunch of movies I'd never seen on tha DVD, but now the DVD player in my room is broken so I actually have to do work.

Does this affect your crush on me, Pooks?

Posted by: Kayanne at December 3, 2008 11:20 AM

Listen boo, nothing can affect my cruch on you. We are joined at the hip.

Posted by: Pookie at December 3, 2008 11:27 AM

Actually tamantha I am on wicked awesome cold medication but it doesn't seem to be affecting my groinal area. *checks Tina Fey post* Nope I'm good.

I don't think she's ugly she's just meh.

And I have to agree with Pookie "Cathouse" is fantastically fucked up.
But why are you putting your cruch on Kayanne? Is this some new kink I'm not aware of?

Posted by: admin at December 3, 2008 11:33 AM

admin I think what Pooks was trying to say was "crunch." As in: "Oh my god, Guy (Pooks) is totally crunching on you!" "Do I wanna be crunched?" "By Guy(Pooks)? Oh yea."

See, Pookie-kins is really into Drew Barrymore references.

Posted by: Kayanne at December 3, 2008 11:48 AM

Sounds painful.

Posted by: admin at December 3, 2008 11:52 AM

Sounds painful.

The Drew Barrymore references? Oh, trust me, they can be. But these sacrifices must be made!

Posted by: Kayanne at December 3, 2008 11:58 AM

Hee, I'm just being antagonistic Kayanne, if I were a guy I'd happily risk breaking Fey's signature glasses by furiously banging her against the wall.

You know there are ways for you to do that without the whole "if I were a guy" stipulation.

In fact, if you don't mind, I am enjoying a few mental scenarios of such an event right now....

Posted by: Vermillion at December 3, 2008 12:05 PM

Ha, Vermillion thank you for reminding me of that! I read that initially and thought, "Oh who are you kidding, you'd do that sans penis and we all know it!"

Tina Fey is awesome. And her interview in VF only made me love her more. I need to hug her.

Posted by: Kayanne at December 3, 2008 12:26 PM

Tina Fey is awesome. And her interview in VF only made me love her more. I need to hug her.

Obviously you don't love her enough then.

Julie has it right. You need to watch some more 30 Rock until you are ready to enter into bodice-ripping, glasses-breaking, wall-cracking passionate throes of lust on sight of the woman.

Sorry, once I get lesbians on the brain, it is very hard (hehe) to get it out.

Posted by: Vermillion at December 3, 2008 1:11 PM

I meant crush, not crunch. Crunch implies eating, though I'm not opposed to eating K, nevertheless I meant crush.

Posted by: Pookie at December 3, 2008 1:13 PM

I'm not a lesbian! I'm...cooter friendly.

I don't know what that means.

Posted by: Julie at December 3, 2008 1:18 PM

You need to watch some more 30 Rock until you are ready to enter into bodice-ripping, glasses-breaking, wall-cracking passionate throes of lust on sight of the woman.

Can't we just cuddle!?!

Also, I prefer to be the one getting her glasses broken, not the other way around. And she's like... 5'4" and I'm 5'10" so she could never do that to me... Er no, wait. Why am I trying to work out the schematics in my head?

Also, I thought it was awesome that she's so fiercely involved with her hubby and would never fiddle. Giving her a hug would be just alright with me.

it is very hard
That's what she said! Hee!

Posted by: Kayanne at December 3, 2008 1:18 PM

Crunch implies eating, though I'm not opposed to eating K, nevertheless I meant crush.

Oh God, I hope I wouldn't crunch... But thanks for keeping me on the straight and narrow, Pooks! I knew there was a reason I didn't file that restraining order! XOXOXO

I'm...cooter friendly.

Hahahahahahahaha. Julie that almost seems like there should be an alliance, like, "Friend of the Cooters." Randy Newman can change the words of his hit song to be the title of the alliance to: "You've Got a Cooter Friend In Me!"

Also, in the south, Cooter is often a nickname given to slack-jawed gentlemen. Even more hilarious.

Posted by: Kayanne at December 3, 2008 1:25 PM

Hey, didn't Paul Anka do a love song about Cooter called "I Love Cooter Baby"?

Posted by: Pookie at December 3, 2008 2:40 PM

Sadly, no. The song you're thinking of is "I Love YOU Baby."

But I understand how you may have misheard.

Posted by: Kayanne at December 3, 2008 2:54 PM

It's been far too long that Mr. Buscemi has been absent from our lives. He is far too talented to take breaks from TV or movies. I can think of 20 actors who need to take a break right now (Tom Cruise, Nicole Kidman, Ben Stiller - oh please GOD!, Kate Hudson, Katie Helms...to name a few)...

Posted by: ph at December 3, 2008 4:32 PM

Just being picky again, but at least it's not about grammar:
What makes you think that women in the '20s had big hair? They wore it in waves very close to the head. I'm sure Ms. Macdonald can manage that.

Posted by: Ann at December 3, 2008 8:56 PM