Pajiba

oh dear.

is it wrong that i think that chris pine is still boyishly good looking, though? i mean, he was good enough for princess mia...

Ugh. I don't even like Star Trek and I am offended by that preview on it's behalf.

Maybe I should become a fan, so I can properly hate it....A Klingon Christmas Carol- Here I come!

I've never been able to bring myself to care about Star Trek. I know nothing about it. I saw one episode once when I was a kid and all I remember was a tight purple jumpsuit, Whoopi Goldberg's hat, and a creepy little girl who tried to blow up the ship or fight the Gorgamons or kick some reaver ass or something.

I was able to appreciate the silver (well, bald) foxiness of Patrick Stewart. And I was thrilled to see the dude from Reading Rainbow.

Working title - Star Trek: Submissive Bottom

This looks lame. What a shame. I was hoping that Scotty and Bones would be interesting, but the brief clip here makes them look stupid, too.

I don't know why they are setting Kirk up to look like a reckless loose cannon. He wasn't that way in the show or the movies based on the original show. He might used an unconventional solution, but it was always well thought out beforehand.

Oh you have got to be fucking kidding me.

Oh man I laughed so hard during the whole thing I almost choked.

OOooh I can not WAIT to see this. It's gonna be fucking AWESOME!

So. Angry. How fucking dare Abrams shit all over Star Trek like this? I didn't expect this movie to be any good but I wasn't expecting this level of suck either. I hope Gene Roddenberry's ashes condense into a mini-meteor and come crashing down to earth right into JJ's balls.

I think it looks awesome and i'm not even sorry for thinking that.
Chris Pine is hot and the boy CAN act, he can.

My actual main issue is Quinto. He doesn't have the vocal timber for Spock and his hair and eyebrows look like something cobbled together by a hardcore fan at a convention-they idea is right, the design perfect, the exectution....not so much

I think this could be okay, guys, i'll be honest.

I mean lets be completely honest here- Anything after the abortion that was Star Trek: Enterprise' is going to be just a little bit awesome

that...ugh that fucking pile of fucking shit was so god awful

Now ive got that shit in my head.

Damn it

I think it looks awesome and i'm not even sorry for thinking that.
Chris Pine is hot and the boy CAN act, he can.

My actual main issue is Quinto. He doesn't have the vocal timber for Spock and his hair and eyebrows look like something cobbled together by a hardcore fan at a convention-they idea is right, the design perfect, the exectution....not so much

I think this could be okay, guys, i'll be honest.

I mean lets be completely honest here- Anything after the abortion that was Star Trek: Enterprise' is going to be just a little bit awesome

that...ugh that fucking pile of fucking shit was so god awful

Now ive got that shit in my head.

Damn it

yeah, that looks pretty horrible. and i'm still gonna see it. for two reasons: Simon Pegg and Karl Urban.

My big problem is the car he destroys i mean if i grabbed the mona lisa and smeared my shit all over it i dont think i would be asked to go to the naval academy . Young Kirk destroys a 1957 corvette in what ever fucking year they are supposed be in and its no big deal ? I mean that car has to be worth millions upon milions by then right ? I mean shit you cant buy one now for less than 40 - 50 grand . What do you think it will be in like 500 years if one is still around. Yet he still goes to star fleet . Hell i almost lost my security clearence when they found out i had an uncle in prison .

I don't know. When I saw it before QoS, it got me interested in seeing this movie for the first time ever. It looks fun, especially if that kid in the first 15 seconds of the trailer isn't actually in much of the movie. I can see the Retarded-brand Gay, yes, but I still think it looks kind of awesome. And not even "Retarded-Gay-Awesome," rather, retarded and gay, yes, but separately awesome. Hard to explain.

Unless Mr. Roarke and Tattoo are in this, count my cracked ass out. The best Star Trek, in my opinion, was that one where Capt. Stubing and Gopher were tracking down Director McCoy, and they get all tangled up in that trap and friggin' Villechaize comes out and is all ""My dear guests, I am Mr. Klingon, your host. Welcome to the Death Star." MAN ALIVE! They just can't write shit like this anymore... Stupid Hollywood anyhow...

Thar be comment issues today.

So how much do you suppose that vette was worth , because im thinking a 400 year old vette is around 10-20 million.

No, you're gay. So there.

For non-Trekkies like myself, this could well be 2009's so-bad-it's-good gem.

/cue amped up tribal music...

"Worlds will collide"

/cue drama, sex, explosions, high-intensity cut-aways...

/fucking yawn

Best Trek theme music, GO!

Deep Space Nine, no contest. That shit makes me cry it's so beautiful. I am a sucker for good orchestrated themes. I am a music nerd.

Sorry for the redundancy/almost double post. Wanted to make sure everyone knew how much I like that theme, and do the mini diversion.

It doesn't look very Star Trek-ish to me, but I don't think it looks bad.

Nadine, I don't think Quinto has the voice for it either, but I don't think Abrams cast him w/out checking with Nimoy. He's a good actor, so I'll give it a shot. I only hope that Tyler Perry's part is more of a cameo than anything else.

Star Trek lost all relevancy for me when they installed that cunt Janeway as Captain. As far as Pookie is concerned, the only thing a woman should be the the Captain of is my dick.

How dare they defile the Star Trek series by turning it into a bunch of special effects sequences and nerdy space nonsense?

Seriously I don't see what the problem with the trailer is. It doesn't give away enough story line to conclude that it's vapid. The effects looked big-budget. The lines were a little cheesy, but not stab-yourself-in-the-eye-so-you-can't-feel-the-pain cheesy. I don't go to Star Trek movies expecting Spike Jonze directing Vincent Gallo in a one-man-show adaptation of Proust shot handheld with no cuts. I expect the classier type of sci-fi porn. This could be that.

Also, I'm now convinced Shatner is a genius for not being involved with this in any way - whether or not he was invited.

Very funny Pookie's Dick, I don't need a fluffer, the job is already taken.
------------------------------------
Posted by: Pookie at November 17, 2008 3:31 PM

Pookie you are one talented sumbitch. The ability to self felate is an admirable one.

They are so gonna do it.

If I have to revoke my Pajiba membership card for this, so be it. But I am also excited (and a member of the soon-to-not-be-so-shy minority) to see what Abrams has done with the franchise.
I typically look at it this way - if the trailer looks awesome, the movie will suck (Will Smith in anything).
If the trailer gives you a "that could be cool" vibe, it probably will be (Star Trek trailer).
And if the trailer sucks, run for the hills because if there aren't enough decent pieces of movie to catch my interest for 2 minutes (The Other Boleyn Girl - "we're sisters, and therefore, born to be rivals") then you mock it mercilessly with the receptionist in your office tells you that she got it on Netflix and thought it was pretty good.

-- Very funny Pookie's Dick, I don't need a fluffer, the job is already taken.

Posted by: Pookie at November 17, 2008 3:31 PM

Pookie, will you please be decent enough to have these conversations with your penis in private. I do not think it is appropriate to discuss such things on this family site. There are children reading.

So how much do you suppose that vette was worth , because im thinking a 400 year old vette is around 10-20 million.

I, too, love J.J. Abrams, and I think the hate for this is just growing because people want it to suck. The trailer looks fine if not a little redundant and derivative, but whatevs to that... Great movies can come from mediocre trailers.

Then again, what do I know? I loved Star Trek: Voyager.

GLIP, I thought money was irrelevant on Earth at that time? At any rate, you have to factor in inflation and the use of "latinum". Also, isnt it possible that was all a hologram or something?

Maybe the corvette was replicated, or maybe you can get custom made body work (program the extruder with the design and it does all the work), after all the designs would be out of copyright.

Also I didn't think the trailer looked that bad either.

Mins. 1:28-1:31

Sooo... The bridge is an Apple Store?

Curse you, Steve Jobs!

JP you're kidding right? I mean we having people making comments like "sucking the balls off a goat" and " You're a bunch of cunts" or "shove it up your ass, Lt. Uhuru" but somehow you find my post inappropriate? Oh ok.

All this talk about sucking goat balls and shoving things up asses is making me hard.

Pookie's dick you're such a annoying heckler.

ahem...

AAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

whew...

...wait...

AAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

man, for the past (ulp!) nine, going on ten, years i've been embarrassed about being a Star Wars fan, but being a Trekkie now must really suck.

and by suck, i of course mean "suck giant, sweaty, 'gay'-as-in-lame, James T. Kirk balls."

hey, look on the bright side- it looks like this pain should be reasonably short lived, not at all like the ten-year, three-prequel torture that we have endured (fuck you, Lucas. fuck you).

welcome to the club, bitches. enjoy.

So wait...with the exception of the random unknown person that got killed every episode, the entire crew all met as 20 something year old's and have served together for like 60 some years, with the entire time having the same jobs and rank for the most part?!?!

Hey so did anyone else think the space battle thing in the last third of the trailer looked a lot like the final space battle in Serenity? Because my mind went there right away.

Also, I'm thinking why the hell not see this? You can make fun of the trailer (for this or anything) all you want, but don't insult the actual movie (for this or anything) until you have seen it. I think it looks okay. I was hoping that they would return to the roots by having less action and more situation solving (which is what made it different than Star Wars), but it doesn't look like it. Ah, well.

Lastly, yes it does look very cheesy. However, Star Trek's always been kinda cheesy, and it's not like every iteration has been so good that something cheesier or stupider or just more unintentionally hilarious is that big a deal anymore. The memory's already been tainted.

ghost toast, you are correct. Star Trek has always been cheezy but there is a difference between a fine slice of old cheddar and this fucking Velveeta.

It would also appear that they are actually trying to take themselves seriously with this rendition. I find that quite a lot of the appeal of the original series and movies was the camp and humour. What are they going to do with this shit? Drop a few White Castle jokes?

Kids, kids, kids. Have none of you SEEN the original? Kirk was a show-off, running around banging every space chick in sight. He CHEATED to become an Admiral (the Kobayashi Maru scenario, anyone?) And there's was always a tension between Spock and Kirk. And I'm a geek.

Kobayashi Maru was to graduate Starfleet, not become admiral. I'm okay with Kirk being a bit of a dick, but the Kirk in this trailer does not work for me. Kirk may be a bit of an ass, but he never gave off that trying-too-hard-for-coolness vibe that this whole trailer gives off. Trying. so. hard.

Stop using the word douchetool. It isn't clever.

Really, no one' said it yet?

Then allow me:

KHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!!!!!

Never open with a kid. Anikin shows us that.

otherwise, I'll give it a shot. I love the whole dorky 'the world is better in the future' thing. hell, until obama, I was ready to just give up and get cats, a poking stick and a small lawn to protect.

Yeah, I agree. Bras, naked chicks and shite. That's really gay for ya.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

KHAAAAAAAAA.err...GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYY!

The original series was a bit before my time, so I don't consider myself a classic Trekkie, but I loved TNG and DS9. Voyager is when the suck started to happen. Enterprise wasn't even bad enough to be worth hating, it was just lame.

WHY why why do they keep going BACK in time instead of forward? I've seen enough of Kirk and his crew in the movies. There's nothing else worth exploring there. I don't need to see them as kids. I don't WANT to see them as kids. Especially when they try so damn hard to portray them as "badasses". Look, he stole a car! And he's speeding! While evading the law! And for some reason he drove right towards a CLIFF before ditching the car and nearly dying in some retarded little stunt! J.J., you are confusing with "badass" with "jackass."

That being said, I like the look of the trailer, in that it doesn't look like the same old Trek, which is far too timid at times. Now if they would only go a step further and come up with some new characters and new ideas, I could get excited. Not everything in Trekdom has to revolve around Kirk.

Also, someone commented on why women would need bras in zero-gravity. First of all, I'm pretty sure they have artificial gravity. Second of all, I think bras would be even MORE necessary in zero-grav. Mine would float around and whack me in the face and pose a danger to crewmembers unless they were strapped down.

grumpyoldman: well said.

*shakes head*

This, this is EXACTLY what I thought it was gonna be like:

DoucheTrek.

Sigh

I love this site. I never post but I read here daily, often more than once a day and I hate to be a wet blanket and I am sure I am going to get flamed but I am so disappointed in Dustin and everyone else who failed to call him on this lame lame lame use of the word gay. Aren't we past this? Think what you say when you say what you say. It's not ironic and cute and pomo even when sarah silverman says it. it's just lame.

Douchebag McDouchikins lost me when he abandoned Alias...and yes, I know Jennifer Garner is terribly wooden, but the rest of the cast was decent, at least for the first three seasons.

Except for Michael Vartan.

Is it just me, or does it look like he's constantly on the verge of tears?

BWeaves--sure, you can have one. I'm all about the sharing. But be warned--they've brought me nothing but trouble.

Also, there is such a thing as too big, and when you add in the effects of gravity and my age....I've said too much.

DeadBessie: Thank you! I will treat it with respect, and give it its own bedroom. When men want to see my chest, I will bring it out on a velvet pillow and let them pet it (for a price). No pinching allowed.

More like Star Trek: Cardassia Prime Drift.