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If Your Kid Can't Play Sports, Forget About Being a Good Parent

By Dustin Rowles | Posted Under Trade News | Comments (14)

Russell-Bffrand.jpg

It’s not a new message, of course, but the continuing trend in parent-child relations in Hollywood is that the only real way a father can bond with his son is through sports. If your kid is overweight or an introverted video-game geek, it’s just not going to work out, father-son wise. I’m sorry to break that.

Peter Cattaneo will be the latest director to hammer home that message. The director of The Full Monty and, more recently, the little-seen The Rocker, is set to direct What the Puck, based on the true story of a father and son who bond over a messy divorce through their mutual love of ice hockey, a mutual love that leads them to the World Junior Championships in Canada.

If that junior ice-hockey team had only managed a 4-5 season, of course, that father and son wouldn’t be talking to each other now — the kid would be calling some other guy with a beard and a punny sense of humor his father.

It’s not funny cause it’s true.

Elsewhere, in dumb kid’s sports movies, Russell Brand — the Yahoo Serious of our Day — is reportedly signed on to play a David Beckham-like millionaire soccer star slash playboy who gets arrested in a Friday Night Lights-like West Texas town and sentenced to community service, which involves coaching a kid’s soccer team.

Man, that community service contrivance will never, ever go away.

You guys remember Will Ferrell’s Kicking and Screaming? No. Nobody does. Five years from now, no one is going to remember this movie, either. In fact, I doubt anyone will remember much of Russell Brand. either, especially if he goes through with that remake of Drop Dead Fred he was once attached to. Does anyone remember Rik Mayall? Of course you don’t — you thought Yahoo Serious starred in Drop Dead Fred, too.*


*(That’s just me, isn’t it?)









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Comments

Kicking and Screaming was actually one of Will Ferrell's better movies. I still thoroughly enjoy it when they drop it on one of the 30+ HBO's they have now apparently. Also, what's a Yahoo Serious?

Posted by: ThatGuy at February 12, 2010 3:00 AM

^ The question correct question is, 'Who is Yahoo Serious'.

Posted by: Mr Tambourine Man at February 12, 2010 4:46 AM

Rik Mayall, everyone in England remembers Rik Mayall. from 'The Young One's', to 'Bottom' with Adrian Edmondson, or 'Edward Elizabeth Hitler', and other things, including now, kiddies TV shows such as King Arthurs Disasters. He's a national treasure you yanks never understood.

Posted by: Keith at February 12, 2010 5:56 AM

As an overweight video-game geek, I can assure you that the only time I bonded with my father was when we were yacht racing (shutup, it is a sport!).

Posted by: Chugga at February 12, 2010 7:19 AM

About the Russell Brand movie, did anyone else immediately think of The Mighty Ducks or The Big Green (which is set in Texas I think) rather than Kicking and Screaming? Maybe I am getting old if I remember two "OK" sports movies from the 90's better than a Will Ferrel movie I've never watched in full. Maybe the well really has been hit up too many times for this kind of story?

Posted by: ihatemike at February 12, 2010 7:25 AM

I loved Rik Mayall in Drop Dead Fred, and I really need to watch that again, it was a childhood fave. But I am mostly fond of him for reading George's Marvellous Medicine on Jackanory.

Posted by: Carrie at February 12, 2010 8:02 AM

My father laments to this day that we've never played catch. He's always like, "I hope when you have a son he loves sports." I've got a leg up on the family by getting my nephew hooked on comic books early.

Posted by: superasente at February 12, 2010 8:42 AM

Russel Brand is gross. He seems to be the kind of person you'd lick you on the subway.

Posted by: ZombieNurse at February 12, 2010 10:15 AM

*who'd lick you.

Posted by: ZombieNurse at February 12, 2010 10:16 AM

I like the first one, ZN.

Posted by: Ian at February 12, 2010 10:25 AM

"who'd lick you on the subway."

First time I've heard it called that. Kind of works, doesn't it?

Posted by: BierceAmbrose at February 12, 2010 10:34 AM

I remember Kicking and Screaming because Mike Ditka got called "Juice Box Boy." It made me giggle. And if you've got Iron Mike and Robert Duvall in the same movie, then you've got gold.

We have one of those introverted video game geek boys and he and his football/wrestling father get along just fine, thank you.

Posted by: wsapnin at February 12, 2010 11:04 AM

You do realize that Russell Brand did not just spring into existence w/ Forgetting Sarah Marshall, right? And that just because Americans forget about you doesn't mean you cease to be?

So... I'm with Keith, I suppose.

Posted by: Sara at February 12, 2010 10:15 PM

Rik Mayall is King Herod in the TV movie of Jesus Christ Superstar. I'm an Orthodox Jew and I remember him for that. See this, and you won't forget him anymore:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-M0tWvdM_qA

Posted by: Lahav at February 14, 2010 7:03 AM