Pajiba

You know what should be done to Superman to make him more human and relatable?

Kryptonite Hemorrhoids.

"What's the matter, Superman? Got a flare-up because you forgot to wipe this morning? Jesus! Why is it always just before Doomsday gets here? What the fuck, man? Don't they teach you proper wiping techniques on your planet? Here's some ointment. Let's hope it starts working before he gets here. Hehe, guess you're not so 'super' with the TP, eh buddy?"

Superman punches me in the face.

"You hit like a bitch without your superpowers! Ahahahaha!!! Oh shit, Doomsday's here. I don't know what you should do!! Hit him with a polyp! His confusion and revulsion will buy you more time."

Doomsday easily smashes Superman.

"Shit."

I'd watch Zachary Levi as Superman. But that has less to do with how well I think he'd be at playing Supes and more to do with how much I have a crush on him. He really would need to buff up, though. Which, would lead to less crushing, but oh well.

RobP, Baldwin would be fun as Superman and people are here were suggesting him for Captain America, but you run into the same problem: He's older than they want. For whatever reason they feel that all these superheros need to be in diapers for the young folks to get "hip to it," completely ignoring the fact that RDJ is in his 40s and Christian Bale is in his mid-30s and they've done amazing. Dear Hollywood, actors and actresses who are over the age of 30 are still capable of doing awesomely dynamic roles. I don't need all my future movie stars farmed right from Disney movies.

I think I actually trust superheros a bit more when they're not fresh out of puberty.

I say this every time a Superman discussion comes up, but cast Jon Hamm as 1930s-1950s era Man of Steel who works to prevent World War II (and, subsequently, the Cold War).

Don't forget that the character was originally created during the 1930s by two Jews who wanted a hero to right the wrongs being perpetrated on their people and others. Everyone roots for Indiana Jones when he's fighting the Nazis, so why couldn't it work for Superman? Have the Nazis use genetic engineering to create their own Aryan Superman (as long as he doesn't look like that asshole in Superman IV) and the two of them could fight all over Europe. Jon Hamm could do his Don Draper thing with the fedoras and suits as Clark Kent, too.

The character of Superman worked much better during that time period than he does in the modern world, anyway. People find it much easier to relate to a conflicted, morally ambiguous, mortal character like Batman than they do to a nearly-invincible alien Boy Scout who fights for "truth, justice, and the American Way." There is still a fantastic Superman movie out there somewhere, and going away from the standard origin story set in today's world would be a great place to find it.

@Brigs:

Dunst started off ok (mostly) as Mary Jane...I recall a lot of love for her nipple-centric rain scene...but she rapidly diverged from the comic book version into a morose mess. Elena certainly looks the part; if she can bring some of the character's trademark swagger then we'll have a winner.

@Abe Froman:

A Jon Hamm period-piece alternative history version of Superman would be ideal. It would be even better if Supes was "depowered" into something resembling his original less-than-omnipotent incarnation (i.e. pretty much invulnerable but can still get knocked on his butt by artillery shells, etc). The Max Fleischer model would be a good start. Of course, I'll hold my breath waiting for Hollywood to greenlight it.

Kayanne, I wasn't actually serious about Adam Baldwin. I mean, if the studio heads weren't so gung-ho about youthanizing the super heroes, I'd be all for it. He'd make a good Cap, too, but I'd have like to see Tom Jane or Mark Valley in the red, white, and blue. Also, as I've said before, NPH really ought to get a chance to play a live-action Spider-Man. It's kind of sad that he's in his 30s and considered too old, when I was a kid I always thought most of the super heroes were in their 30s. Sigh. He'd be perfect.

I swear they made Kirsten Dunst uglier as the series went on. I thought before the first movie they should've cast Laura Prepon, 'cause MJ has balls (um, in a good way?) and kicks PP's ass. Y'know, in a good way.

This girl is definitely a step up, physically.

Abe Froman, that's a great idea! If the Cap movie doesn't suck (unlikely) and does well (possibly) that might be a something the studios will want to copy.