You Can't Kill What's Already Dead
So, in a move that surprises no one, but should anger everyone, there will be another entry into the Resident Evil franchise. The newest film, Resident Evil: Afterlife, did well at the box office last weekend, hauling in $27 million simoleons, despite being, well, fucking stupid.
In an interview with Vulture, star Milla Jovovich said, “This new Resident Evil is the first one to ever open at number one worldwide. It’s the biggest movie in the franchise… So we’re definitely going to make another one.”
Of course you are. Listen Leeloo, I love you as much as the next red-blooded human being, but you need to STOP. THIS. SHIT. The movies are on a steadily plummeting spiral, getting more and more nonsensical, and despite the gosh-golly effects and the cliffhanger endings, they are still not good.
But wait! There’s more!
Jovovich claims the next entry will be “a more interactive process,” and that husband/director/writer/producer/asshole Paul W.S. Anderson will likely seek out fan interaction and ideas. Great. On the one hand, the ideas can’t get much fucking stupider. On the other hand, the concept of soliciting ideas from th morons who actually liked the last few movies is equally terrifying.
This series needs to die. It needed to die three movies ago. It’s already dead inside. It just needs to learn to lie down. Unfortunately, that does not appear to be its destiny.
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