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Court's Adjourned: Ranking The New Dredd Images In Terms Of Their "Adorkability"

By Rob Payne | Posted Under Trade News | Comments (24)



pajibadreddisadorkable.jpg

News of the latest live-action movie adaptation of the 2000AD “Judge Dredd” comix, Dredd, has been trickling out slowly for the better part of a year. Before now, the best look we’d had of star Karl Urban, as the new Judge Dredd himself, was barely lit, much less fit to be seen. The images of Olivia Thirlby as a rookie Judge and Lena Headey as big bad Ma-Ma were better if only to sate some curiosity about who the actresses were actually playing. But now we’ve actually got something to work with and, in spite of the obvious uptick on rated-R violence, Dredd might just be the most huggable depiction of a decaying urban dystopia we’ve yet seen.

Click on the images to see them in all their (possibly NSFW in one instance) glory.

Here’s Karl Urban in his full Judge Dredd regalia, while practicing the Execution part of his Judge, Jury, and Executioner job description.
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I’ll admit, this one doesn’t necessarily meet the definition of “adorable,” much less “adorkable.” Maybe if there were more dead bodies?


I don’t know who this guy is but he seems to be another Judge.
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That it looks like he thinks he can take on Mr. Dredd all by his lonesome is precious.


Here’s our first full look at Olivia Thirlby as Judge Anderson, either blowing out some sap’s brains or being saved by somebody off-screen who’s exceptionally good at taking head shots. (Perchance Dredd, from the first pic?)
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Doesn’t she look like just the cutest thing? I’m genuinely surprised the Mega City police force makes body armor in her size.


Judges Dredd and Anderson looking sharp as they take names — er, hopefully there’s still some manner of due process going on here.
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The size discrepancy going on here is the height of whatever Zooey Deschanel’s catchphrase means. It’s probably a good idea they didn’t issue Anderson a helmet, because then we’d be looking at a snapshot from Take Your Daughter to Work Day.


Finally, our best look at Karl Urban in that aforementioned helmet, as well as his showing off his shiny, new name tag.
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Gaawwww.

You can see the whole adorkable movie starting September 21.


Rob Payne also writes the indie comic The Unstoppable Force, tweets on the Twitter @RobOfWar, and his ware can be purchased here (if you’re into that sort of thing). As long as Rob Schneider doesn’t have a un-billed cameo in this thing, he’s really looking forward to Dredd.









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Comments

inB4gofuckyerself

Posted by: gp at February 7, 2012 11:07 AM

Jesus, if Urban's snarl gets any snarlier it'll snarl right off his face.

Also, in the headshot pic, what kind of a pose is that, Thirlby? Huh? Are you holding a gun or about to spread your arms and tell Jack that you can fly?

Posted by: zeke the pig at February 7, 2012 11:12 AM

Megamind looks like kindof a badass in those pictures.

Posted by: superasente at February 7, 2012 11:16 AM

Certainly they seem to have caught the classic Dredd uniforms exactly right. I'm a little surprised by the side by side pic. Either Urban is a dwarf or she's a six footer.Guess they'll need to use some of that LOTR camera magic to make him the Dredd that dominates the comic book pages.

Posted by: Zipper666 at February 7, 2012 11:19 AM

It would be nice if once, just once, a chick in a movie actually knew how to handle a gun. As soon as that thing kicks, she's going be eating the recoil.

Posted by: dahlia6 at February 7, 2012 11:21 AM

September 21st? What the hell are we even talking about this for?

Posted by: Todd at February 7, 2012 11:27 AM

It looks horrible and given Karl Urban's filmography, it is statistically likely to be a horrible movie.

Posted by: kerokan at February 7, 2012 11:29 AM

You know you're fucking hungover when you write 'snarl' instead of 'scowl'. When you do it three times in a row you start to suspect that you should probably quit drinking for a while.

Posted by: zeke the pig at February 7, 2012 11:31 AM

Since my sole purpose today seems to be posting about actors' heights...

Urban is 6'1", Thirlby is 5'4", so it has to be a weird camera angle.

And yeah, Urban looks pretty snarly scowly.

Posted by: Barry at February 7, 2012 11:40 AM

“adorkable.”

Is someone trying to make that happen? Because, I don't think so...

Posted by: Meander at February 7, 2012 11:41 AM

Karl Urban is 6'1" and Olivia Thirlby is 5'4"

That's just a really bad photo.

Posted by: DeistBrawler at February 7, 2012 11:43 AM

GODDAMN'T, BARRY!

Posted by: DeistBrawler at February 7, 2012 11:43 AM

Holy shit Diest, we crossed streams...

RUN!

Posted by: Barry at February 7, 2012 11:44 AM

Sorry, DEIST. I was running too hard to notice vowel placement.

Posted by: Barry at February 7, 2012 11:46 AM

I don’t know who this guy is but he seems to be another Judge.

Deobia Oparei aka Judge T.J. Alvarez. It's not tough to find.

IMDb the law!

Posted by: branded at February 7, 2012 11:48 AM

I'm going to rate them according to RIDICULOCITY instead:

1. 4/10 for latexaliciousness
2. 2/7 for furrowing
3. cantaloupe
4. +3 baby powder
5. B- for scowlerocityhood (factoring in a +5 for level of difficulty)

Posted by: Mrs. Julien at February 7, 2012 12:09 PM

Have I told you I love you today, Mrs. Julien?

Posted by: MM at February 7, 2012 1:20 PM

If he scowls any deeper you could plant root vegetables in the furrows.

Posted by: The Wanderer at February 7, 2012 2:14 PM

rob you are a fucking idiot
and craig if you are reading this
fuck you too

Posted by: greg at February 7, 2012 2:22 PM

greg

I don't know if you are doing that as a running joke that is funny to no one but you; I do know that it has run its course. You're here all the time and must have other things to say. Please say other things. Or at least get a little more creative in your disparagement. English has the largest vocabulary of all the languages. What good are words like "gobshite" or "blatherskite", if they never get to leave the cupboard?

Kisses,
Mrs. Julien

P.S. Mark Twain had cats named Gobshite and Blatherskite. How cool is that?

Posted by: Mrs. Julien at February 7, 2012 2:35 PM

Dahlia, if the biggest logical inconsistency is that a judge's gun handling skills are subpar, I will eat that shiny oversized helmet. Besides the Lawgiver fires 6 types of rounds using verbal command, blows up or stuns unauthorized users, works on supernatural entities and has a camera in it's barrel. So I'm thinking limited recoil ought to be a snap.

Posted by: Mrcreosote at February 7, 2012 4:24 PM

I love Pajiba with all my heart. And Rob, I'm a big fan. But for the love of all that is holy, this site has got to stop using that horrific word. Yes, I mean "adorkable." Every time I see it on the internet I want to stick my head in an oven. Please just help make it go away.

Posted by: beckster at February 7, 2012 5:03 PM

Mrs Julien, you are a wonderful woman :D

I didn't know that about Mark Twain, makes him even more awesome than I already thought.

I vote from the look of that image with Thirlby and Urban that he has bent his knees a little (check where his hips are in comparison to hers). She is also that distance behind him so appears to be the same height. It's not a shitty image, it's perfectly fine considering that information.

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Posted by: lily at February 8, 2012 1:54 AM