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Did You Know Anne Hathaway Has a New Movie Opening Friday? Neither Did We.
Trailers / Dustin Rowles

Trade News | September 3, 2008 | Comments (25)

passengers-0.jpgThough it is technically on the release schedule for Friday, Anne Hathaway’s new horror thriller, Passengers has no official theater count, I have seen no advertisements, and so far as I can tell, the trailer for the film was only released Monday. Why, with a cast that also includes Patrick Wilson, David Fucking Morse, and Andre Braugher, would a studio want to bury this movie?

All the clues you need lie within the trailer.









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Comments

"Stay away from me, Claire. Stay away."

With riveting dialogue like that, it's no wonder the studios held it so close to their collective chest. Repeated exposure to such a profound level of awesome might cause brain hemorrha-- aw, shit. My ear's bleeding.


Hold up. Was that...Clea Duvall? Aaaand there goes my other ear.

Posted by: Mella at September 3, 2008 10:07 AM

Hey, there's nothing wrong with Clea Du...I mean, she was in the Facul...she's just great in...uhhh...

So...Anne Hathaway has a new movie coming out? Gotta see that.

Posted by: Shadows of Dakaron at September 3, 2008 10:14 AM

"Your credibility is on shaky ground"?
That line made it into the trailer?
Wow. Bury the dead and feed the living, Hollywood.

Posted by: tommytimp at September 3, 2008 10:15 AM

As long as Patrick Wilson spontaneously bursts into song, I'll see it.

What?

This isn't a horror musical?

Well, fuck that.

Posted by: Jaci at September 3, 2008 10:39 AM

Dear Andre Braugher:

I think you are a talented and handsome man who elevates any show he's in. However, while your TV role choices have ranged from respectable (Hack) through genius (Homicide: Life on the Street) to high art (Thief), your movie choices have been atrocious. Examples include Frequency, Rise of the Silver Surfer(!), and this piece of crap. Please, please, PLEASE do yourself and your fans a favor and find another decent TV show.


Thank you,

Three-nineteen

Posted by: Three-nineteen at September 3, 2008 11:09 AM

ok, here's a question: if we know that we are going to be in a theatrical lull of sorts until the next round of good movies comes out, can we PLEASE get the Pajiba staff to review, I don't know, some GOOD movies from Netflix or something?
Like, a few documentaries would be awesome. or some indie stuff that totally missed their theater runs (great call on Tell No One, best Saturday matinee I've seen in a while, and the only reason I would darken the door of a non-Alamo Drafthouse theatre).

I mean, it's not like I need a Pajiba review of Disaster Movie to know I will NEVER SEE IT. EVER.

/end rant - sorry, not a very energetic morning for me.

Posted by: Stella at September 3, 2008 11:42 AM

Stella, don't they already do that, what with the Guides to What's Good For You, the Underappreciated Gems, the Classics Week guides, the Boozehound, and so on? I think they recently did a piece of great documentaries, too.

Now if they want to INCREASE the number of these articles for a short while, I can get behind that.

Posted by: Vermillion at September 3, 2008 12:09 PM

What's the Pajiban outlook on Hathaway? I find her infinitely bang-able. But really I don't know why. She doesn't seem like she'd be my type, all leggy and doe-eyed but she's got it goin' on. She is quite an enigma. In my pants.

Posted by: Optimus Rhyme at September 3, 2008 12:20 PM

Anne Hathaway is on my Free Five list.

Posted by: Shadows of Dakaron at September 3, 2008 12:22 PM

Anne Hathaway is gorgeous, she has such amazing eyes and lips. I'd kill to look like that. I'd kill for so little, really. I'd kill for a ginger ale right now, and all I'd have to do is walk downstairs. But strangling someone with my iPod headphones would be much more soothing.

Posted by: Julie at September 3, 2008 12:27 PM

I'd love to see Ranylt's take on The Texas Chainsaw Massacre. (the 1974 masterpiece, of course, not that stupid remake with Jessica frickin' Biel.)(Not that I dislike her, she was lovely in that one about magic with what's-his-name.)(And I liked her in Blade: Trinity.)

Remind me never to piss off Julie...

Posted by: Anna von Beaverplatz at September 3, 2008 12:35 PM

Julie always knows just how to turn me on. Whisper sweet murdery nothings in my ear.

It's alright baby...I love you just the way you are. But...umm...could you put on this wig? And get a little leggy? And you gotta spruce up the puppy-dog eyes...

Posted by: Shadows of Dakaron at September 3, 2008 12:44 PM

What's the Pajiban outlook on Hathaway? I find her infinitely bang-able. But really I don't know why. She doesn't seem like she'd be my type, all leggy and doe-eyed but she's got it goin' on. She is quite an enigma. In my pants.

Posted by: Optimus Rhyme

Her teeth are a little rabbitty, but I haven't a wang, so her toothiness isn't necessarily a deal breaker for me. I think she might be a little tame in the sack, though, and that IS a deal-breaker.

Posted by: Mella at September 3, 2008 12:47 PM

I don't get mad I get stabby.

I blame the lunar cycle for my mood today, Anna. :) That, and the guy who tried to run me over on my way to work.

I think she might be a little tame in the sack, though, and that IS a deal-breaker.

Yup.

Posted by: Julie at September 3, 2008 12:55 PM

C'mon guys, I think the movie looks really good! Anne Hathaway would NEVER star in a sub-par picture.

Right??

Posted by: Raisin'Cookies at September 3, 2008 1:00 PM

....god damned lunar-freaking cycle and its grrrr-inducing crying jags at work and fuck. I mean, just, fuck.

I'm right there with you, Julie.

Excuse me while I go back to the bathroom to cry for another half-hour or so.

Posted by: elizabeth at September 3, 2008 1:10 PM

Anne Hathaway looks like a Bratz doll. And she seems like she'd be tame in bed because she's BORING. The first offense is forgivable; the second is not. I don't get all the love.

Posted by: Jimbob at September 3, 2008 1:17 PM

Anne Hathaway is gorgeous, she has such amazing eyes and lips. I'd kill to look like that. I'd kill for so little, really. I'd kill for a ginger ale right now, and all I'd have to do is walk downstairs. But strangling someone with my iPod headphones would be much more soothing.

So say we all, Commander. Strangling, especially barehanded if you can do it, gets that real personal touch where you can feel each twitch and attempted gasp. And Hathaway? Yum. Any word on her changing her no-nudity clause? Cuz that there's a world of depression all in itself.

Posted by: lordhelmet at September 3, 2008 1:47 PM

Hey, there's nothing wrong with Clea Du...I mean, she was in the Facul...she's just great in...uhhh...

She rocked in But I'm A Cheerleader!, and her guest spots on Buffy and Heroes were pretty decent.

Of course, that doesn't make this film look any less crappy. And it doesn't make that trailer any less stupid - those were the most arresting pieces of dialogue they could find? And it didn't occur to them that putting the first two-and-a-half acts of the film into the trailer might make people a little reluctant to pay €8 just to see the last 10 minutes? Yeesh.

Posted by: Shay at September 3, 2008 1:48 PM

As long as Patrick and Anne have a lot of sexy times together, I could really care less.

And this can go in the discard pile for Anne's career - Rachel Getting Married looks infinitely more interesting.

Posted by: whatBENwatches at September 3, 2008 2:01 PM

Hey, there's nothing wrong with Clea Du...I mean, she was in the Facul...she's just great in...uhhh...

she was good in girl, interrupted!

Posted by: kate at September 3, 2008 3:31 PM

I think she might be a little tame in the sack, though, and that IS a deal-breaker.

Yup.

in the words of George Costanza: I KNEW it!


But...but...I know where it is!

Posted by: Jay at September 3, 2008 6:20 PM

"Jessica Biel was lovely in that one about magic with what's-his-name".
Edward Norton is a what's-his-name now?

Posted by: Irina at September 4, 2008 1:24 AM

no, no! I just couldn't think of his name at that moment, or the name of the movie. I like Norton.

Posted by: Anna von Beaverplatz at September 4, 2008 9:04 AM

Fearless II; this time it's personal... and doesn't have Jeff Bridges.

Posted by: Eep at September 4, 2008 6:29 PM