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Inching Ever Closer to a Zombie Twilight

By Dustin Rowles | Trade News | September 24, 2009 | Comments ()

By Dustin Rowles | Trade News | September 24, 2009 |

Granted, the duo did bring back Star Trek, churned out an unexpectedly fun studio romantic comedy, The Proposal, and gave us "Fringe." But they're also responsible for producing the Transformers movies, for giving us Eagle Eye, and for writing The Legend of Zorro and The Island. In other words, they're the guys behind JJ Abrams and Michael Bay. That's good. But it's also bad. But in either respect, they should stay out of the zombie business.

They're next project: Xombie. Cute name, huh? It's about a zombie. Who is also a policeman (I hope for the zombie's sake that he's a fast zombie, otherwise those chase scenes won't have a lot of suspense). The hook, here, is that Xombie comes from a former policeman turned screenwriter, Will Beall, who is basing the movie on James Farr's graphic novel. Farr's creation centers on a zombie cop named Dirge who attempts to saves humanity's remnants, particularly a young girl named Zoe, from evil zombies.

Hmmm. A good zombie saving a human from evil zombies? Granted, it hasn't been done in the zombie genre yet, but it has several times over in the vampire genre. Note, however, that zombies don't have a sense of humanity. They are dead. They grunt. They moan. They eat brains. That's it.

And holy shit! Does this mean we're growing ever closer to a zombie version of Twilight? Edward, a teenage zombie, falls in love with Bella, and tries to resist eating her brains? Oh unfuck me and shoot me in the head.

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