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Oh, Sinestro Is Not Going to Like This At All

By Dustin Rowles | Posted Under Trade News | Comments (207)

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Several more images from The Green Lantern debuted last night, and fortunately for us, the green highlights were in fact a reflection. The suit still looks kind of silly (sorry, dude), and, well, I get sort of a cheesy vibe from the overall aesthetic. But I’ll let The Green Lantern, Sinestro, Aquaman, Dr. Doom, and … Aqualad (who the hell is that) duke it out. (And if the comments for this post are half as good as yesterday’s Green Lantern post, y’all might want to stick around.)

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Comments

Aqualad is Aquaman's British cousin.
He enjoys having scones with his tea, he is a very graceful swimmer, and thinks his cousin is tacky.

Posted by: Sofía at July 16, 2010 9:39 AM

He looks serious.

Posted by: Fredo at July 16, 2010 9:41 AM

Aw damn, I forgot about that blonde.

Posted by: Jay at July 16, 2010 9:59 AM

This is completely insane, but it still bugs me: when I see a movie “couple” photo where the two people lean in on top towards each other, but leave a large space between their hip regions, I find it extremely awkward, embarrassing and therefore, unbelievable. In the photo above, Blake Lively’s outward ass angle suggests that RyRey’s dick might be radiating something…uncomfortable.

How difficult is it to press yourself against RyRey?! And even if you don’t find him attractive (what’s wrong with you?) you’re an actor! Act like you’re into it. Isn’t that your job?

Or are they not a couple in the movie? Because if someone tells me that they’re siblings, then I’ll be very embarrassed.

Posted by: Scully at July 16, 2010 9:59 AM

Aqualad is a LYING BITCH, that's who he is.

Posted by: Ultimate Colossus at July 16, 2010 10:00 AM

Yeah, Boobs Legsly is just posing with herself.

Posted by: Jay at July 16, 2010 10:01 AM

Fuck this noise. All fish-lipped, seaweed-stinking motherfuckers are gonna get it today. Where the hell is my cocktail sauce?

Posted by: Black Manta at July 16, 2010 10:02 AM

Posted by: the new transported man at July 16, 2010 10:03 AM

Scully, according to the article, she's his boss. And her character actually ends up as a super villain in the comics. I personally know nothing about Green Lantern other than what I read in the trades about this movie, so that's about all the help I can be. There were way more interesting movies and entertainment discussed in that section of EW anyway (it was all about Comic Con), so my focus on this was limited, despite the presence of RR.

Posted by: KatSings at July 16, 2010 10:07 AM

I think Red Lantern Rage Cat has bleeding gum disease.

Posted by: Pinky McLadybits at July 16, 2010 10:08 AM

Hey! Blake Lively dyed her hair brown so she can be a smarty pants! Look at that. She's, like, totally Charlize Theron-ing it. As a brunette myself, I know how hard it can be to fumble along with icky brown colored hair, always being asked questions and having people assume you must have a really good personality. Thank you, Blake Lively, for really ugging it up to play a smart lady, you are a true testament to your craft.

Posted by: Kayanne at July 16, 2010 10:11 AM

Posted by: Kayanne at July 16, 2010 10:11 AM

HA! Noice.

Fuckin' Aquaman. That guy is about as useful as tits on a nun.

Posted by: Anna von Beaverdouche at July 16, 2010 10:19 AM

Sorry guys, but I am ALL OVER this bitch. Totes. I've got some straight up thoughts about the movie overall, but they can wait for a bit.

Here's some nerdtastic news for y'all...my former comic shop in New Orleans, More Fun Comics (there's a plug for ya, Steve & D.C.) tells me they were approached by a location scout for the movie several months back. Y'see the store has these groovy frosted glass cube panels on either side of the front door that gives it a cool retro 50's vibe. The scout said they probably wouldn't use the shot of the store as a COMIC SHOP per se, but he liked the look of the little corner area. Per my pal D.C., there has been no followup so I don't know if my old stomping grounds will make celluloid history or not.

Further, it's my understanding that RyRey, or ReRe, or however cutsey way you say his name, has been with ScarJo, or ScarHo, or...damn it there I go again. Anyway they've been spotted walking their dog around the levee area in Uptown New Orleans, and have apparently been dining at Camellia Grill 2-3 times a week. No, my pal D.C. has NOT spotted them during any of this.

And finally, to my superfriends:

Aquaman - Arthur, yer still m'boy. Keep pumpin' that blowhole, buddy. You'll find your Chicken of the Sea yet...as long as Mera doesn't find out.

Sinestro - This is you. *power rings a giant penis with Thaal Sinestro's head* Get it, dickhead? You're a dickhead, you ugly, red, source of all fear.

Spider-Man - Shouldn't you be posing for your photo pimp Parker?

Dr. Doom - Geez...talk about "tin-plated dictator"! Back to Latveria with you or I'll give you a power ring spanking ya little bitch.

(and as at best an occasional commentator, I was VERY happy to spread the lulz around yesterday)

Posted by: Green Lantern at July 16, 2010 10:19 AM

It's just more of the "why cast THAT person?" which Spider-Man almost cracked the universe with. "You cast a blonde as Mary Jane now you've gotta put a blonde wig on a redhead to be Gwen? What the fuck, man?? I coulda not had to deal with the Dunst at all! if you'd gotten this right!"

Blake doesn't stand a chance against Darwyn Cooke and Brooke Shields.

Posted by: Jay at July 16, 2010 10:21 AM

Grrrrrrrrrr I'm the Green Lantern, maybe I can use my power ring to conjure up a smile.

What do you get when you mix the unfortunate costume from Daredevil, the tone of Ang Lee's Incredible Hulk, the "acting" talent of Fantastic Four (Tim Robbins CAN throw up an occasional stinker), and the scope (but none of the charm) of Buckaroo Bonzai?

A comic book movie I'm not going to bother seeing.

Just get me to Batman Shows Them How To Do It 3

Posted by: D-Day at July 16, 2010 10:23 AM

Further, it's my understanding that RyRey, or ReRe, or however cutsey way you say his name...

I don't even have to say anything. These jokes are just writing themselves.

Posted by: Sinestro at July 16, 2010 10:26 AM

Khonshu says you all have to die.

Posted by: Moon Knight at July 16, 2010 10:26 AM

Who's Aqualad?
This shit wouldn't happen if Robin the Boy Wonder didn't hog the entire sidekick spotlight! Who do you think drove Speedy to heroin, huh? All the other sidekicks have to live in the shadow of that pompous bastard! Ohhh, look at Batman, he's the Dark Knight. Ohhh, Chris o'Donnell played me in the movie, and he's dreamy. Meanwhile I'm busy trying not to choke on BP oil over here, and does anyone care? Hells no. Being a marine superhero at this point is like being on Dirty Jobs without all the Mike Rowe hotness. So, yeah from now on, I'll be Aqualad, the sidekick with the power to drink Jager until I puke. Also the power to not give a damn about Black Manta-Even Aquaman isn't scared by a guy in a helmet.

Posted by: Aqualad at July 16, 2010 10:30 AM

Is Ryan Reynolds pinching a loaf or what? He looks constipated in every picture. Or maybe he's just trying really hard to flex his abs constantly.

*yellow construct of Ryan Reynold dropping a deuce*
*with a little dick*

Suck on it, Hal. Long and hard, I want you to suck on the suck.

Posted by: Sinestro at July 16, 2010 10:31 AM

D-Day,

I gotta agree to disagree. I didn't HATE "Daredevil", though I was kinda 'meh' on "Incredible Hulk" and slightly 'meh' on both the FF movies.

Hey at least you recognize the CHARM of the movie...but it's Buckaroo BANZAI. B-A-N-Z-*A*-I. "Bonzai" is a tree. Well, actually it's "bonsai", but still.

And yeah, as someone with both a power ring AND a Team Banzai headband, I can nitpick.

Posted by: Green Lantern at July 16, 2010 10:38 AM

Can Green Lantern and Sinestro just do it already? The sexual tension in the room could be cut with a knife.

Posted by: Kayanne at July 16, 2010 10:40 AM

Laugh at the helmet all you like, guppie dick. I'm not the one trying to breathe through tar. Can you say "filtration system"? Helps me whoop your ass in even the most polluted conditions.

Posted by: Black Manta at July 16, 2010 10:40 AM

Sinestro - Y'know why the film has to have both you AND Hector Hammond as bad guys, Thaal? 'Cause your nefarious..ness...can't finger Hammond's cerebelum. THAT'S why.

*power rings a diapered, bottle hugging baby Sinestro in a playpen*

You gonna cry now, baby? Huh? You gonna cry you Fu Manchu moustache wannabe? C'mon cry! Cry! One, two, three CRY! Pansy.

Aqualad - Garth, c'mon, you know it was Speedy's, er Arsenal's...er, Red Arrow's...er ROY'S *band* that drove him to heroin, not Robin. I mean "Great Frog"? C'mahn...I'd probably wanna shoot up too if my band was called "Great Frog".

Posted by: Green Lantern at July 16, 2010 10:45 AM

Kayanne - I AM married, y'know. See the "Parenting" section for some stories about me and Mrs. Lantern.

Besides, Sinestro has a red ass. Red. I doubt even the gayest of gay men would wanna schtup an alien with a baboon-butt.

So no, no sex. Just fighting. Sex is for later after I'm victorious and Mrs. Lantern treats me like the champion I am. Yup...

Posted by: Green Lantern at July 16, 2010 10:48 AM

Hey, Aquaqueer, maybe if you didn't have a sissy-ass name like AQUALAD, people would give a fuck about you. As it stands, you're the bitch of the sea. I'd call you the queen of the sea, but you don't even have the balls for that.

I don't know why I don't just exterminate all of you fruitcakes.

Posted by: Lobo at July 16, 2010 10:50 AM

*yellow construct of me fucking GL in the ass*

Posted by: Sinestro at July 16, 2010 10:51 AM

Sinestro, why don't you get some real facial hair, you loser.

Posted by: Green Arrow at July 16, 2010 10:53 AM

Green Arrow, didn't your world invent bullets like, centuries ago? I thought so.

Posted by: Sinestro at July 16, 2010 10:59 AM

which Green are you more likely to pay to see?? Lantern or Hornet??

i'm going Hornet... Lantern looks retarded

Posted by: asthon koosher at July 16, 2010 11:04 AM

also... why so serious??? would it kill someone to smile??

Posted by: asthon koosher at July 16, 2010 11:05 AM

Woops! It's early and I haven't had my coffee. Don't get me wrong, I'm not a vacuous douche in need of a beating with lava-hot, staple-covered bamboo sticks like that hipster moron in the McD's commercial (oh you know what I'm talking about..."Don't talk to me until I get my coffee." How bout I bludgeon you with a sledge and set you on fire?), guess I'm just hazy and skipping on the details. Peter Weller is awesome.

I liked the idea behind DD: Murdock is cleaning up NYC, Electra/Bullseye show up, Kingpin, yadda yadda. But the movie was too clean and almost cookie-cutter, clearly trying to appeal to everyone. Ben Affleck + karate = NOOOOO!

I like parts of Bana Smash!, but the Josh Lucas (?) parts were not handled well, and the crazy doggies lost me. Hulk Breaking out and throwing tanks around = good.

Fantastic Four sucked. "Meh" is reserved for the lukewarm. Those movies were so bad Marvel has stopped acknowledging them entirely.

Posted by: D-Day at July 16, 2010 11:06 AM

YOU CAN ALL JUS' SHUT IT!! IMMA AQUALAD DAMMIT AND Y'ALL WILL RESPECT ME! IMMA A WORTHWHILE MEMBER OF THE SUPERHERO COMMUNITY, AND IMMA BUST SOME ATLANTEAN WHOOPASS OUT ON ALL OF YOU IF I DON'T GET SOME PROPS!! CRAP, THE DAMN BOTTLES EMPTY-hold on, I'll be right..damn it, how do you even open a damn bottle underwater? COME OVER HERE MANTA,I'VE FINALLY GOT A USE FOR YOU. OPEN UP THIS BOTTLE!! THE REST OF YOU WATER COVERS LIKE 3/4th OR 7/8ths OF THE WORLD'S SURFACE BASTARDS, SO I'M MORE IMPORTANT THAN THOSE DAMN LAND BASED JERKS! Damn it, I hate all you bastards.

Posted by: Aqualad at July 16, 2010 11:10 AM

I'll be there first day. I'll have all my power rings on finger. I'll recite the oath.

But damn if this doesn't look like it could turn out to be a little bit of a stylized train wreck. Kind of all over the place, like an expensive episode of Smallville.

Actually, it echoes the Corman Fantastic Four...

If it really is terrible, it could be the first nail in the big-screen comic book adaptions coffin. Folks are already tired of the over saturated market.

Then Joss Whedon's "Great Gatsby" of comic movies will come out, and the bar will be cemented, and we can all walk away from this a little bruised, and broken, but happy.

Posted by: Brian at July 16, 2010 11:10 AM

Green Arrow - Ollie, my man! 'Bout time you showed up!

*tsks at Sinestro's current ass-fucking construct*

Oh you'd like that wouldn't you, ya fear-mongering perv. Don't you have little children to scare or something? G'wan witcher not-so-bad-self.

Lobo - I know you wanna pretend differently, but it must be sad being the LAST Czarnian. Is THAT where all the anger's coming from? D'you wanna talk it out? Go have a beer or fifty? C'mon, my partner Green Arrow is here, and he can party pretty hearty...and I've been known to put away more than my share. We're here for ya, Main Man. Just say the word.

Posted by: Green Lantern at July 16, 2010 11:11 AM

Have you met me? I'm like, the biggest asshole in the universe. I come from a race of assholes. No I don't miss them. Besides, I'm getting too much human poon to miss them.

Also, Aquapunk, stop yelling. The big boys are talking and you're interrupting. Try to finish that wine cooler without spilling on yourself.

Grow a pair of balls, you fucking glorified wet-nap.

Posted by: Lobo at July 16, 2010 11:17 AM

You do NOT want to party with that guy. Trust me on this.

Posted by: Vril Dox at July 16, 2010 11:18 AM

Fuck off, Sinestro. Any asshole can fire a gun. Using a bow with brutal efficiency is an art. Shut your face before I go William Penn on your melon fivehead.

Posted by: Green Arrow at July 16, 2010 11:19 AM

Well, he could light me up any day.

Sorry, Sinestro, but you just don't have the same brooding puppy dog face.

Posted by: esme at July 16, 2010 11:21 AM

I'm batman.

Posted by: Micheal Keaton at July 16, 2010 11:26 AM

No, you fuck, I'm Batman.

Posted by: Christian Bale at July 16, 2010 11:27 AM

Posted by: Micheal Keaton at July 16, 2010 11:26 AM

That can't be topped.

Posted by: Kayanne at July 16, 2010 11:27 AM

Hey...I understand you're all flexing off right now, trying to prove a point...but anyone know anywhere who's hiring?

Lobo...I would totally polish your chain...

Posted by: Resurrection Man at July 16, 2010 11:27 AM

I should never have been Batman.

Posted by: Val Kilmer at July 16, 2010 11:28 AM

I'm the Lizard King.

(and I'm Batman).

Posted by: Val Kilmer at July 16, 2010 11:29 AM

My cat and I just did an eighth.

We agree, I'm the only one who can walk in both worlds. I'm the Ghost Rider.

And Superman.

Posted by: Nick Cage at July 16, 2010 11:30 AM

No, you fuck, I'm Batman.

Posted by: Christian Bale at July 16, 2010 11:27 AM

No... Fuck you. I'm Batman.

Posted by: Adam West at July 16, 2010 11:30 AM

Bah! Look upon my visage and tell me you're not getting horny.

http://www.comicbookmovie.com/images/users/uploads/12499/sinestro.jpg

Posted by: Sinestro at July 16, 2010 11:30 AM

I have a special set of skills. I'm Darkman.

Posted by: Liam Neeson at July 16, 2010 11:31 AM

Brian - "In brightest day," my man.

And yeah, I gotta admit I really REALLY do want this to succeed. I mean it's one thing for The Trinity (Superman, Batman, Wonder Woman) to get a good Hollywood film off the ground, but I truly believe it's been enough time that the B-Squad of characters like Flash and Green Lantern can get their time in the sun. The success or failure of "Green Lantern" will prove that one way or t'other.

Either way, I'm predicting a lot of power rings on a lot of kid's fingers before long.

Posted by: Green Lantern at July 16, 2010 11:31 AM

Yes, those people are Batman.

Posted by: Bruce Wayne at July 16, 2010 11:32 AM

I'm Dr. Ross.

Posted by: George Clooney at July 16, 2010 11:32 AM

Sinestro - Horny? Try "repulsed" you evil, yellow dickweed.

Posted by: Green Lantern at July 16, 2010 11:33 AM

I'm Jesus.

Suck on that, wannabes. The OG of Superheroes.

Posted by: Jim Caveziel at July 16, 2010 11:34 AM

I'm Jesus.
Posted by: Jim Caveziel at July 16, 2010 11:34 AM

We've got something in common JC! We should totally get together. I can tell you what a vagina feels like!

...pussy.

Posted by: Resurrection Man at July 16, 2010 11:36 AM

I'm heeeeeeeeeee-uhhhhhh.

Posted by: Roger Rabbit at July 16, 2010 11:37 AM

I am the walrus, dammit!

Posted by: Paul McCartney at July 16, 2010 11:40 AM

Hey Ressurection Man , I called... I want my the poorly rehashed 90's version of my schtick back.

I'll be waiting upstairs, in your moms bed, having sex with her... You mother.

Posted by: Dead Man at July 16, 2010 11:42 AM

Shut the fuck up Paul! You're out of your element!

Posted by: Walter Sobchak at July 16, 2010 11:43 AM

Posted by: Paul McCartney at July 16, 2010 11:40 AM

No, fuck you! You're dead! You've always been dead! I'm the fucking walrus!

Posted by: John Lennon's Ghost at July 16, 2010 11:43 AM

Hey man, there's a beverage here man!

Nice marmot.

Posted by: The Dude at July 16, 2010 11:44 AM

huuuuuuuuuuck-HUUUUUCKK-Are those scales? When the hell did I eat seafood? Ariel, NOOOOOOOO!!!!

Posted by: Aqualad at July 16, 2010 11:45 AM

Good Lord, I'm so tired of those twits.

Posted by: George Martin at July 16, 2010 11:45 AM

I am almost clapping my hands in glee at the return of the Superhero Comment War.

Also: RyRy's eyes are definitely too close together.

Posted by: figgy at July 16, 2010 11:45 AM

Bruce Wayne clearly wins, but Aqualad should take his show on the road. Good stuff, all around. Wish I knew more about non-Bat-related-DC Comics.

Posted by: RobP at July 16, 2010 11:46 AM

Actuall Paul and John you're all dead. I even investigated your murders.

What a madcap romp it was, boy howdy.

http://www.oddballcomics.com/article.php?story=archive2002-09-16

Posted by: Batman at July 16, 2010 11:47 AM

I'm Jesus.

Posted by: Jim Caveziel at July 16, 2010 11:34 AM

And I'm God. Suck on that, punk.

Posted by: Morgan Freeman at July 16, 2010 11:47 AM

I ruined the Batman movies.

Posted by: George Clooney at July 16, 2010 11:47 AM

And I'm God. Suck on that, punk.

Posted by: Morgan Freeman at July 16, 2010 11:47 AM

Excuse me?

Posted by: George Burns at July 16, 2010 11:48 AM

Hey, uh Morgan ... Let's talk for a second, okay?

Posted by: George Burns at July 16, 2010 11:48 AM

Hey Ressurection Man , I called... I want my the poorly rehashed 90's version of my schtick back.

Don't even try to pull that shit, motherfuckeer! At least I got my own series from the get go and didn't have to piggy-back off of other supers! You're nothing more than the whore of the afterworld! Tell me Boston (what a gay name)...why did you always possess guys??? And what's up with always entering from the back door?

Posted by: Resurrection Man at July 16, 2010 11:48 AM

You'll have to forgive my ignorance, I've never been much of a comics fan- even at a fairly young age I realized that drugs were a better value than comic books- so I'm not really up on the Green Lantern canon.
Therefore, I'll be making a few assumptions here.

The hero's name is Coleman and he camps out a lot...right?

Posted by: clocker at July 16, 2010 11:53 AM

Let the universe despair, for I have returned.

Posted by: Thanos at July 16, 2010 11:54 AM

Hey Ressurection Man , I called... I want my the poorly rehashed 90's version of my schtick back.

No...it's my schtick.

Groundhog Day motherfucker!

Posted by: Phil Connors at July 16, 2010 11:54 AM

Actually, Ressurection Man , Posion called. They want their hair back.

And I'm also sexing up your father.

Posted by: Dead Man at July 16, 2010 11:56 AM

Spare me, Thanos. You ain't shit.

I will devour you all.

Posted by: Galactus at July 16, 2010 11:56 AM

I can breakdance.

Posted by: Vibe at July 16, 2010 12:02 PM

I can breakdance.

Great. Maybe you can take Aqualad to the prom. I'm sure he'll give you a handy afterwards.

Posted by: Lobo at July 16, 2010 12:07 PM

Greetings!

Might I say it is sensational to see such a glorious, glamorous, gammafied out pour of happy hilarity from you marching merry Marvelites, and fans of the Distinguished Competition.

It's fine funny folks like you that keep the mysterious machinations of comic creativity a churning.

I hope this startling adventure into space and beyond lives up to the enormous and enigmatic expectations held.

Keep reading!
Excelsior!

Posted by: Stan Lee at July 16, 2010 12:07 PM

Actually, THANOS , your nothing more than a fat balding dude, with a green scarf.

And Norman Osborne had super aging twins with Gwen Stacey.

Posted by: J. Michael Straczynski at July 16, 2010 12:09 PM

Actually, Galactus , your nothing more than a fat balding dude, with a green scarf.

And Norman Osborne had super aging twins with Gwen Stacey.

( Sorry. The post before this was a result of a Superboy continuity punch)

Posted by: J. Michael Straczynski at July 16, 2010 12:12 PM

I'm gonna dip my balls in it.

Posted by: Louie at July 16, 2010 12:15 PM

God, you B-listers are coming out of the woodwork aren't you? Thanos? Dead-man? Fucking Resurrection Man?! Who's next, Turok Dinosaur Hunter? Beta Ray Bill? Gnort? Always trying to get in with the cool kids, aren't ya' guys? It's cool. We get it. Who wouldn't want to hang out with Lobo?

Tell ya' what, when one of you gets a movie (or even just a series of your own) we'll tolerate your presence, but for now why don't you silence youselves and let the big boys banter.

Man, I never thought I'd be looking forward to Spider-man's next comment.

Posted by: Sinestro at July 16, 2010 12:22 PM

Bravo, Stan Lee. Bravo.

Posted by: superasente at July 16, 2010 12:23 PM

Posted by: Peter Quill at July 16, 2010 12:24 PM

Shut up. All of you. Bunch of babbling babies.

Posted by: Darkseid at July 16, 2010 12:25 PM

Sinestro that's a lot of talk from a dude who looks like the afterbirth of John Water's one night stand with a glass a pink lemonade.

Posted by: Dead Man at July 16, 2010 12:28 PM

Tell ya' what, when one of you gets a movie (or even just a series of your own)...

I was a featured extra in Breakin' and Breaking 2: Electric Boogaloo.!

Taught 'Shabba-Doo' Quinones everything he knows.

Does that count?

Posted by: Vibe at July 16, 2010 12:28 PM

VIBE! Where you been at?

Posted by: Ozone at July 16, 2010 12:31 PM

Babbling babies? Don't even get me started.

Posted by: Parallax at July 16, 2010 12:34 PM

Spoiler Alert: Im Keyser Soze

Posted by: Verbal Kint at July 16, 2010 12:34 PM

Parallax ... great... a big yellow, cockoh roasch.

Posted by: Tony Montana at July 16, 2010 12:37 PM

God, you B-listers are coming out of the woodwork aren't you?

You rang?

Prick.

Posted by: The Owl at July 16, 2010 12:40 PM

I'm batman.

Uh-hyuh-huh-huh-huh-huh-huh-huh-huh
huh-huh-huh-huh-huh-huh-huh-huh
Mmmmyah-huh-huh-huh-hah-hah-hah-hah-hah-hah-hah
hah-hah-hah-hah-hah-hah-hah
DAAAAAAAAH-HAH-HAH-HAH-HAH-HAH-HAH-HAH-HAH
HAH-HAH-HAH-HAH-HAH-HAH-HAH-HAH-HAH-HAH

Posted by: PREDATOR at July 16, 2010 12:42 PM

I'm Robin.

Posted by: Marlon Wayans at July 16, 2010 12:44 PM

Cockroach? Cockroach? Who you calling a cockroach? You have a scar...on your face...SCARY. Its little two piss villains like you that give the word VILLAIN a bad name.

Bitch...I'm the stuff of nightmares.

Posted by: Parallax at July 16, 2010 12:44 PM

I'm all that.

Posted by: Will Smith at July 16, 2010 12:47 PM

VIBE! Where you been at?

Killed by a fucking android! Can you believe it?!

Posted by: Vibe at July 16, 2010 12:48 PM

I'm Spartacus

Posted by: Kurt Russell at July 16, 2010 12:49 PM

Shit wrong one, I'm Spartacus.

Posted by: Keri Russell at July 16, 2010 12:50 PM

I thought I was the stuff of nightmares?

Posted by: Freddy Krueger at July 16, 2010 12:51 PM

Right, this time I better be right.

I'm Spartacus.

Posted by: Issur Danielovitch at July 16, 2010 12:52 PM

Keep dreaming Freddy.

Posted by: Candyman at July 16, 2010 12:53 PM

None of you even know the meaning of nightmares.

Posted by: Pinhead at July 16, 2010 12:55 PM

When did all of these posers start coming out of the woodwork?

Posted by: Parallax at July 16, 2010 12:56 PM

Spartacus? You all better just be fucking around.

Posted by: Kirk Douglas at July 16, 2010 12:58 PM

I'm Parallax. Wahhhh Wahhh Wahhh... I've been here longer... Stop diluting my comedic well... wahhh wahhh wahhhh.... Posers blah, blah... LOOOK AT MEEEEEEEEE LOOK AT ME! I was funny first.

I'm sexing your father now too, in a power battery. Suck on that.

Posted by: Dead Man at July 16, 2010 12:59 PM

That goes for you too, Issur. You're ancient history.

Posted by: Kirk Douglas at July 16, 2010 12:59 PM

I will control all of you with fear! I can scare anyone, even the powerful Spectre!

Go back to the circus where you belong Deadman. It is Deadman right? Not, Dead Man? You can't even spell your name right. Amateur. Ohhh, that's right, because you really are from the CIRCUS. Probably never even graduated high school.

Posted by: Parallax at July 16, 2010 1:07 PM

Listen Lobo, I've already told you I'm not interested. I know the leather pants, jacked up roid muscles, Bozo level face paint, big (overcompensating) bike, crappy tats and whiny backstory work on some, but when it comes right down to it, you're a poor excuse to insert street cred into the DC universe. Didn't Batman hand you your ass at least once? Yeah, that's what I thought.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Brightestday10-1-.jpg

A picture of me, in case you haters don't respect the 'Lad.

Posted by: Aqualad at July 16, 2010 1:11 PM

Wow, a pic of you beating Deadman, only the second lamest hero in the universe.

The first one is you, by the way.

Get back to me when the other nut drops, wet wipe.

Posted by: Lobo at July 16, 2010 1:13 PM

You're so cute when you're mad, Parallax.

Posted by: Ion at July 16, 2010 1:16 PM

I will devour you all.

Posted by: Galactus at July 16, 2010 11:56 AM

Yeah yeah. We've heard it before.
*holds up Ultimate Nullifier*
This is your cue to run off like a little girl.

What'chu gonna' do when MR. FANTASTIC rolls in?! HOLLAAAA...

Posted by: Reed Richards at July 16, 2010 1:28 PM

Parallax, pft. You're an old testament rip off and an emo-douche with no class. Ooh I manipulate fear. You're as second rate as Superboy-Prime. Just another bunch of bollocks god characters trying to play off the original meta-villain; me. Even Darkseid gets a Crisis to his name and he's fat. You get a zombie book and the ability to give Hal and Kyle better teeth.

Fuck all it took is a painting of Kyle's mum to free him. You're ineffectual and yellow like Perez Hilton.

Posted by: Anti-Monitor at July 16, 2010 1:28 PM

Name's Ash....Housewares.

Posted by: Bruce Campbell at July 16, 2010 1:35 PM

What'chu gonna' do when MR. FANTASTIC rolls in?!

... stop fucking his wife?

Actually, nah.

Posted by: Namor at July 16, 2010 1:38 PM

What?

You fight dirty you son of a bitch. Dirty!

Posted by: Parallax at July 16, 2010 1:38 PM

Admittedly I'm still a little pissed at how you failed me previously. I might just go the Galactus route next time and get me stoner surfers as my heralds. Megalomaniac David Niven, two different versions of Supermanboy and emo piss streak didn't really do me any good.

Posted by: Anti-Monitor at July 16, 2010 1:42 PM

Piss off, Anti-Monitor. You aren't needed here anymore.

Posted by: Nekron at July 16, 2010 1:50 PM

Come on to dry land and say that, old man.

Don't think I didn't hear about your long nights with Toro during WWII. The last time Iron Man had Cap and I over for a few drinks, Cap opened up about the night he found you two "snorkling" each other. I can't imagine what that would mean though (Imperious Douche), since you can breath under water. Care to clarify?

Posted by: Reed Richards at July 16, 2010 1:51 PM

I'm the supreme fucking being. I'll take out all of you.

As soon as I find my multipass.

Posted by: Leeloo Minai Lekarariba-Laminai-Tchai Ekbat De Sebat at July 16, 2010 1:55 PM

Y'know what Namor, I'm being unfair. You're not gay and it was immature to imply you were.

I suppose it's enough that you have permanent shrinkage from the cold of the deep sea.

MR. FANTASTIC HOLLAAAAA...

Posted by: Reed Richards at July 16, 2010 1:58 PM

Hey, I'm not ashamed. The king of the sea is... experimental, you know? You should try it sometime, maybe then the missus wouldn't keep "going for a swim," if you know what I mean. Man, you wanna talk about airtight. That girl likes to get down.

Posted by: Namor at July 16, 2010 1:58 PM

Oh, snap!

Posted by: Dr. Doom at July 16, 2010 2:02 PM

...

Posted by: Black Bolt at July 16, 2010 2:09 PM

I'm with Namor.

Wait, what?

Posted by: Human Torch at July 16, 2010 2:18 PM

Yeah, the "king" of the sea is experimental all right. There isn't a coral reef, atoll, shipwreck, lost city, Ancient One, leviathian or puffer fish that freak hasn't tried to get down with. Just so you know, underwater it's known as a "Dirty Namor". I do agree however that Sue Storm? Bangin'.

Posted by: Aqualad at July 16, 2010 2:25 PM

Any room for me here?

Posted by: Rex Mundi at July 16, 2010 2:31 PM

Me too?

Posted by: Spider Jerusalem at July 16, 2010 2:33 PM

If Boobs Legly is going to wear the Star Saphire costume she's going to have to upgrade her chest size again.

Posted by: MiniTs at July 16, 2010 2:44 PM

You know, you wouldn't have all these problems if you kept it in the family.

Posted by: Ultimate Quicksilver at July 16, 2010 2:57 PM

Fuck all you guys! It's all your fault! That isn't MY Green Lantern! It's all wrong and you ruined IT!

Posted by: Ultimate Quicksilver at July 16, 2010 2:59 PM

You folks never disappoint.

Posted by: Dustin Rowles at July 16, 2010 3:02 PM

I know zip zip zero about comics, but y'all are making my day anyway.

Posted by: MM at July 16, 2010 4:00 PM

You folks never disappoint.
Posted by: Dustin Rowles at July 16, 2010 3:02 PM

I do.

Posted by: Spider-Man 3 at July 16, 2010 4:03 PM

No....I do! It's all me!

Posted by: Topher Grace as 'Venom' at July 16, 2010 4:04 PM

Dude, if anyone disappoints, it's us.

Posted by: Carlton Cuse and Damon Lindelof at July 16, 2010 4:10 PM

I'm Harvey Pekar. I ain't no superhero.

Posted by: Harvey Pekar at July 16, 2010 4:11 PM

You want some disappointment?

Posted by: The Avengers at July 16, 2010 4:14 PM

BAM!! You got some...and a sequal.

Posted by: The Fantastic Four at July 16, 2010 4:18 PM

Ha! You guys all have, like, stories and stuff. What a drag.

Posted by: Stretch Armstrong at July 16, 2010 4:26 PM

Stories?

Posted by: BattleShip at July 16, 2010 4:32 PM

What has two sequals and defines disappointment? This movie!

Posted by: Star Wars Episode 1 at July 16, 2010 4:33 PM

Y'all seem to love Clue, so I'm money in the bank. Now blow me!

Posted by: Monopoly at July 16, 2010 4:43 PM

You want disappointment? I'll show you disappointment.

Christ, look at my fucking hair.

Posted by: Ghost Rider at July 16, 2010 4:52 PM

No shit, man. That hair's a fucking mess.

Posted by: Gary Busey at July 16, 2010 4:53 PM

*tsk* Daaaad, you're embarassing meeeee...

Posted by: Jake Busey at July 16, 2010 5:14 PM

You think your dad is embarrassing, Jake?

Posted by: Taylor Hasselhof at July 16, 2010 5:39 PM

*collective eye roll*

Posted by: The Gibson litter at July 16, 2010 5:44 PM

I'm printing this thread out and framing it. You're all crazy as loons and I love you for it.

Posted by: MelBivDevoe at July 16, 2010 6:01 PM

Fuck, man, when Busey says you're fucked up, you are FUCKED UP.

I gotta re-evaluate my life.

Posted by: Nic Cage at July 16, 2010 6:57 PM

How long I been trying to tell you that, Nic?

Posted by: Uncle Frank at July 16, 2010 7:37 PM

Fuck, man, when Busey says you're fucked up, you are FUCKED UP.

Oh, now I'm the asshole?

You're a gut maggot with no guts.

Posted by: Gary Busey at July 16, 2010 7:52 PM

Congratulations Nekron you're either a horribly veiled analysis of race relations or a pre-technicolour captain planet supervillian.

Posted by: Anti-Monitor at July 16, 2010 8:08 PM

WHAT IS GOING ON HERE. MY GOD IN HEAVEN.

Posted by: Mick J at July 16, 2010 11:38 PM

And you're a psycho killer without the killing -- I think. Hell, "Busey" is a noun, a verb AND an adjective on Urban Dictionary! That's impressive, dude.

Posted by: Nic Cage at July 16, 2010 11:43 PM

Will all you fuckers shut the fuck up?!! I'm trying to settle some serious shit here and you assholes keep distracting me. For Christ's sake, you're worse than the fucking jews. Some of you probably are jews. I know the writers are all jews. I'm Mad Max, bitches, I'm Riggs. If you live above ground, I'll burn your hideout down. If you live underwater, I'll fucking poison your ass even worse than BP did. Fucking whiny fuckers.

Posted by: Mel Gibson at July 16, 2010 11:53 PM

You ain't tryin' to draw no psycho pension... you really are crazy.

I'm too old for this shit, Mel.

Posted by: Roger Murtaugh at July 17, 2010 1:20 AM

::in British Accent::

Ah put a corker in it fore I blow you all back to where yah belong with me hair, ere that or I'll let my wolfie here screw yah all over i will, and what's ever left over will be experimented on by Torchwood.

DO I MAKE MYSELF CLEAR YOU MOTHER EFFERS! I AM THE LAST OF THE TIMELORD'S YAH GOT NOTHING ON ME FOOS!

Posted by: 9th and tenth doctor and Bad Wolf at July 17, 2010 3:42 AM

No. No violence, do you understand me? Not while I'm around. Not today, not ever. I'm the Doctor, the Oncoming Storm - and you basically meant beat them in a football match, didn't you?"

Posted by: The 11th Doctor at July 17, 2010 5:18 AM

woof!

Posted by: Rex the Wonder-Dog at July 17, 2010 11:01 AM

::British Accent::

Oh shut up you poser, I am a lot better then you will ever be.

Posted by: 9th and tenth and Bad wolf at July 17, 2010 11:10 AM

Now this is just silly!

Posted by: John Cleese at July 17, 2010 11:32 AM

Amateurs!

Posted by: Dick Cheney at July 17, 2010 11:43 AM

Dick Cheney, bow before me. I am far more powerful then any of these pansy tuckers here. I am THE MASTER, and I will RULE YOU ALL!!!!!

Posted by: The Master at July 17, 2010 12:18 PM

I am the only master around here, fool!

Posted by: Sho' Nuff at July 17, 2010 12:52 PM

Oh come on. We all know there can be only one.

The one is my penis, by the way.

Posted by: Connor MacLeod at July 17, 2010 1:33 PM

We will end you, just like we ended Los Angeles, and then rebuilt it.

Posted by: Angel, Spike, Wes, Cordy, Gunn, Lorne, Fred, Illyria, Conner, and Harmony at July 17, 2010 2:12 PM

Hey there Cordelia. How you doin'?

Posted by: Dick Cheney at July 17, 2010 2:18 PM

fucking arsehole superheroes

Posted by: John Constantine at July 17, 2010 2:33 PM

Shut up Constantine, you're no better. then again. you're only alive cause the Devil needs it hard.

Posted by: Hellboy at July 17, 2010 2:59 PM

So...next week at ten a.m. say? Guys? The ratings are through the roof. Spiral will pick you up.

Posted by: mojo at July 17, 2010 5:59 PM

We are THE MIGHTY MORPHIN POWER RANGERS (CUE THEME SONG) none ya'll don't stand a chance against me.

Posted by: MMPowerRangers at July 17, 2010 8:38 PM

Great Galaxy! What are those weird things?

Posted by: Space Ghost at July 17, 2010 9:17 PM

Don't listen to Mojo. Trust me.

Posted by: Baby Wolverine at July 18, 2010 9:10 AM

Why don't you all come to my resort, and I'll give you the time of your lives......that is if you can survive long enough.

Posted by: Arcade at July 18, 2010 8:07 PM

Last!

Posted by: Brian at July 19, 2010 12:50 PM

That's what you think.

Posted by: K-Pirate at July 19, 2010 2:47 PM

I am the Omega Man!

Posted by: Charlton Heston at July 19, 2010 3:21 PM

I Am a GOD!

Posted by: Kevin Sorbo at July 19, 2010 3:26 PM

Yeah, thanks for letting me die, Mr. "I am a GOD."

Go'damn asshole is what you are...

Posted by: Iolaus at July 19, 2010 4:14 PM

I Am Legend. Hows' that for last?

Posted by: Will Smith at July 19, 2010 7:17 PM

Fuck you, Fresh Prince.

Posted by: Samantha at July 19, 2010 7:19 PM

Samantha, you'd better not be using any magic in here. Now go get dinner ready, Larry and our newest clients will be here soon!

Posted by: Darrin Stephens at July 20, 2010 8:30 AM

That Samantha's not my daughter, you moron -- it's a dog.

Posted by: Endora at July 20, 2010 11:05 AM

CCCCAAAAAAANNNNNNN YYYYYYOOOOOOOUUUUUU DDDDDDIIIIIIGGGGGG IIIIIITTTTTTT???????

Posted by: Cyrus at July 20, 2010 12:19 PM

You're still here? It's over. Go home. Go.

Posted by: Ferris Bueller at July 20, 2010 12:26 PM

Oh, but Ferris, we are home. Home! And this is my room, and you're all here. And I'm not gonna leave here ever, ever again, because I love you all, and - oh, Auntie Em - there's no place like home!

Posted by: Dorothy Gale at July 20, 2010 1:38 PM

Nothing is over! Nothing! You just don't turn it off!

Posted by: John Rambo at July 20, 2010 2:14 PM

It was a bad time for everyone, Rambo. It's all in the past now.

Posted by: Sam Trautman at July 20, 2010 2:47 PM

FOR YOU! For me civilian life is nothing! In the field we had a code of honor, you watch my back, I watch yours. Back here there's nothing! Back there I could fly a gunship, I could drive a tank, I was in charge of million dollar equipment, back here I can't even hold a job PARKING CARS!

Posted by: John Rambo at July 20, 2010 3:21 PM

You're the last of an elite group, Rambo, don't end it like this.

Posted by: Sam Trautman at July 20, 2010 3:43 PM

I could have killed 'em all, I could kill you. In town you're the law, out here it's me. Don't push it. Don't push it or I'll give you a war you won't believe. Let it go. Let it go.

Posted by: John Rambo at July 20, 2010 3:49 PM

I am the law! Put down your weapons and prepare to be judged.

Posted by: Judge Dredd at July 20, 2010 4:05 PM

But there's just one thing I wanna know...How's that damn three seashell thing work?

Posted by: John Spartan at July 20, 2010 4:37 PM

Spartan? John Spartan? Aw shit, they let anybody into this century! What the hell you doing here?

Posted by: Simon Phoenix at July 20, 2010 4:43 PM

I vill break you all.

Posted by: Ivan Drago at July 20, 2010 5:18 PM

This thread is amazing.

Posted by: vryce98 at July 20, 2010 5:29 PM

I want you to promise me you're not gonna stop this, no matter what. No matter what!

Posted by: Apollo Creed at July 20, 2010 5:37 PM

Hey, Drago! Yeah, you -- the one who looks like somebody shoved an air hose up Vanilla Ice's bunghole! You're not a machine, you're just a man.

Posted by: Duke at July 20, 2010 6:44 PM

To all my love slaves out there: Thunderlips is here. In the flesh, baby.

Posted by: Thunderlips at July 21, 2010 8:53 AM

I'll be your love slave!

Posted by: Brooke Hogan at July 21, 2010 10:20 AM

Yeeeaaahhh...that's not creepy.

Posted by: K-Pirate at July 21, 2010 11:29 AM

What about the Hogans isn't creepy?

Posted by: John Graziano at July 21, 2010 11:35 AM

Giggitty

Posted by: Glen Quagmire at July 21, 2010 11:36 AM

I fucked your dad.

Posted by: Brian Griffin at July 21, 2010 1:04 PM

Ohh...that's nasty...

Posted by: Cleveland Brown at July 21, 2010 3:58 PM

Who's that thinkin' nasty thoughts?

Posted by: Janet Jackson at July 21, 2010 8:25 PM