No, FX and Charlie Sheen, I Will Not Manage My Anger
I love FX. I really do. For two seasons, "Nip/Tuck" was deliciously fabulous. It recently finished airing two of the best half-hour shows currently out there, "Wilfred" and "Louie." It's given us "Justified," "Sons of Anarchy," "Archer," "It's Always Sunny," "The Shield," "Terriers," etc. etc. But lately, I've been kind of hating on FX because it's making my day job miserable. The network is directly and/or (arguably) tangentially responsible for three different cases I'm working on right now, and that work is starting to pile up. There are a lot of things that suck about being a lawyer, but for here I'll focus on the fact that I can't really say more about these cases than that. Stupid ethics code.
I can, however, tell you about a different reason I now have to hate on FX, for its soon-to-be-on-air actions. Namely, the widely-reported news that it's picked up and ordered 10 episodes of "Anger Management" to air next year.
Fuck everything about this.
Back in July, Courtney told you that Charlie Sheen was shopping around his TV version of the Adam Sandler/Jack Nicholson movie. I hoped nothing would come of this, despite reports of potential suitors. You hoped this too, even if you didn't know it. But FX dashed those hopes and bit on the carrot that Sheen dangled in front of them.
Again, fuck everything about this.
Nobody was begging for Anger Management to be made into a TV series. Nobody was begging for a new sitcom from Bruce Helford, who is responsible for spooging "George Lopez" on us (which washes away any residual good grace he had from creating "The Drew Carey Show" and writing for "Family Ties" and "Dear John"). And nobody was begging for Charlie Sheen to be brought back into our lives. Comedy Central's roasts officially jumped the shark, nuked the fridge and took a steaming shit in our mouths with September's awful Charlie Sheen roast, and I truly thought that would be the last we'd see of him on our TVs for a while.
But no. Fucking FX had to go give this irredeemable and insufferable prick money and a platform to continue his bullshit "comedic" ways. Says FX's president, John Landgraf, about this: "We think that Bruce Helford, Joe Roth [another co-producer] and Charlie Sheen have come up with a wonderful, hilarious vehicle for Charlie's acting talents--and a character we are very much looking forward to seeing him play."
To steal from Half Baked's Scarface, "fuck you [FX], fuck you [Landgraf], fuck you [Helford], you're cool [Nicholson], and fuck you [Sheen], I'm out!"