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Tom Cruise Set to Hogtie Reese Witherspoon

By Dustin Rowles | Posted Under Trade News | Comments (13)

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The LA Times is reporting that Tom Cruise is eying a Sony project where he’d team up with Reese Witherspoon in a country-and-western drama. Cruise would play a rodeo champ in the movie, called Paper Wings.

Woah! Tom Cruise as a rodeo champ? You all can just let that image run through your head. Now, try to do it without thinking of the word “gay.” Snap button open-collar Western shirt, bucking horse, stirrups and a rope?

You can’t do it, can you? Yeah. Me neither.

In the movie this rodeo champ would fall in love with an up-and-coming country singer, who’d be played by Reese Witherspoon, who is just going to wear that typecasting out (in addition to Walk the Line, she signed on to Pioneer Woman earlier this week).

Will Smith’s Overbook shingle is setting it up, and the LA Times speculates that Gabriele Muccino (Seven Pounds, Pursuit of Happyness) could direct. That, of course, means that Paper Wings is probably a weeper. And my guess is that Tom Cruise’s character dies in the end. Mauled by a bull, no doubt, belying his fantasy death: mauled by a bear.









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Comments

Well...I guess my wish for him to die hasn't come true yet.

Posted by: DeistBrawler at March 25, 2010 4:03 PM

That, of course, means that Paper Wings is probably a weeper.

Well, I'm crying, does that count?

Posted by: Xtreme at March 25, 2010 4:09 PM

Oh, Fresh Prince, deny it as strenuously as you want, but you are clearly a Scientologist.

And Tom Cruise at the rodeo? Gay as a purse full of rainbows carried daintily in the teeth of a pink unicorn.

Posted by: MM at March 25, 2010 5:03 PM

Is that Tom Cruise's Ray Charles impression?

Posted by: Al Borland's Beard at March 25, 2010 5:54 PM

Tom Cruise as a Rodeo "Star"? What's his specialty? Bucking Shetland Pony?

Posted by: UncleJR at March 25, 2010 6:04 PM

Did anyone else hear that? The sound of millions of souls crying out in agony that were suddenly silenced?

Just me then. Okay.

Posted by: greer at March 25, 2010 6:07 PM

As long as the name of his coach is Goose Trickle and the bull that he cannot handle is Icetoro as he rides Fast Slider, or something in that nature, it would bring his career full circle.

Posted by: richmac at March 25, 2010 7:00 PM

This would be a much better movie if Tom Cruise was a time traveling matador.

Posted by: MikeyLikesIt at March 25, 2010 9:19 PM

This would be a much better movie if Tom Cruise wasn't in it.

Posted by: D-Day at March 25, 2010 11:08 PM

Can't La Cruise just go enjoy his millions and run his churchie thing or whatever and stop making movies? And generally getting his picture taken?

He scares me. Seriously.

Posted by: Snuggiepants the Deathbringer at March 25, 2010 11:09 PM

This is exactly the sort of thing that makes it hard to be an American living abroad. Why must Hollywood give aid and comfort to terrorists by pulling stunts like this?

Posted by: cinekat at March 26, 2010 7:53 AM

Now I wish Felicity Huffman had won the oscar, been typcast, and was only offered tranny roles. Her film career would be faring better.

Posted by: Mit_Huffman at March 26, 2010 9:28 AM

Perhaps a bull will go berserk and actually gore him during the filming of the movie.

I would then donate money so that the bull could live out his days in a grassy pasture with the attractive cows of his choice.

Posted by: logan at March 27, 2010 11:12 AM