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Let's Try This Yet Again, Shall We?

By TK | Posted Under Trade News | Comments (23)



man_in_the_iron_mask_17900s.jpg

Sooner or later, Hollywood is going to have to start coming up with original ideas again. You know, like the olden days. Now — make no mistake: I’m not opposed to adapting novels into films. That’s something that’s been done for as long as the medium has existed. But it’s the relentless re-doing of the already-been-done that’s getting a bit tiresome.

Then again, that also brought us Sherlock Holmes, and I’ve got no complaints about that.

In that vein, we reported a while back that there are two adaptations of The Three Musketeers in the works. One is being developed by Paul W.S. Anderson. Let us disregard that one and hope that Mr. Anderson abandons it and sticks to what he knows — namely, zombified action movies starring Milla Jovovich. Just please, stay away from the Aliens and Predator franchises.

The other is being developed by producer Lionel Wigram, who also produced last year’s RDJ success Sherlock Holmes, which kept the original setting but updated the style somewhat. He’s apparently seeking to do the same with the Musketeers, and he may have found his director — Doug Liman.

Interesting. Liman is, overall, a fine director with a resume that has a few personal favorites on it (Swingers, the Bourne trilogy) and a couple of fun afternoon-killers (Mr. & Mrs. Smith, Go). He’s got zero experience with period pieces, but that doesn’t mean much — Guy Ritchie didn’t have much either, and he and Downey knocked Holmes out of the park. Plus, a big-ticket adaptation of Dumas’ classic will likely draw some major names, and between Bourne and the Smiths, Liman clearly can wrangle the stars effectively.

Honestly, we’ve had a spotty history in the last 20 years when it comes to the ole Musketeers. There was the 1993 version that had some bright spots — namely, Oliver Platt, Tim Curry and Michael Wincott (I fucking love Wincott). But it also starred Chris O’Donnell (aka the blandest actor alive) and the lesser of the Sheen and Sutherland clans. Then we had 1998’s The Man in the Iron Mask, which somehow manages to be a better film, yet less entertaining. It starred John Malkovich, Jeremy Irons, Gerard Depardieu and Gabriel Byrne, not to mention a young Leonardo Dicaprio. Another weird hodgepodge of actors, albeit excellent ones (hey, who gives a shit about accents. Everyone! Talk as you wish!).

Personally, I’d rather just see an adaptation of Arturo Pérez-Reverte’s The Club Dumas (let us not speak of The Ninth Gate… ever), but I doubt that’s in the cards. Cannonballers — review that thing, would you?

In any event, I’m not sure when this would actually happen — Liman also has Jumper 2: Jump With A Vengeance on his horizon. Regardless, he’s still in negotiations, so nothing is written in stone yet. But I’ve no major objections to it, as long as he leaves the shaky cam behind. Besides, what looks better to you:

The Three Musketeers — from the director of The Bourne Identity!

or

The Three Musketeers — from the director of Mortal Kombat!

Yeah, I thought so.

(Source: Cinematical)









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Comments

Jumper 2: Jump My Pants? Really? Why?

I think a Holmesque Three Musketeers could work but they'll have to have some pretty serious talent on board and I'm not convinced that Liman is the director that can make this project great.

Posted by: admin at April 6, 2010 10:02 AM

Jump with a Vengeance???? I just almost died laughing in the office.

I think one of my favorite thing about the comment thread this weekend was the commenter who said (Sorry, not sure whom), "Malkovich was doing his mumbly malkovich thing." I've never seen that movie but I just started giggling incontrollably and had to read it to my roommates. Who didn't get as much amusement out of it.

Posted by: dene at April 6, 2010 10:29 AM

You DID NOT just lump Kiefer in with Charlie Sheen. FUCK that noise.

Posted by: TylerDFC at April 6, 2010 10:35 AM

The right answer is Mortal Kombat, no?
You don't think that sounds more fun? I'm done with gritty realistic versions of shit. (See the new Robin Hood) Give Me Fun!

Posted by: Optimus Rhyme at April 6, 2010 10:41 AM

Tyler: I just read your post as, "You DID NOT just jump Kiefer in with Charlie Sheen. FUCK that noise."

It kinda brings a whole different, dirty meaning to your post. I think I have jumping on the mind. Don't know why.

Posted by: BWeaves at April 6, 2010 10:42 AM

I Hope the Hayden Christensen experience doesn't jump onboard again?

Gawd, hate that guy.

I'd go for a restrained Al Pacino as the Cardinal in the musketeers..

Posted by: Magiel at April 6, 2010 10:47 AM

Why does everyone always hate on The Ninth Gate? I really like that movie...

Posted by: Snath at April 6, 2010 10:57 AM

whispering:

Me too, Snatch.

But then again I Like Mr. Depp so much I rewatched the whole first season of 21 Jump Streat this winter.

Posted by: Magiel at April 6, 2010 11:03 AM

seriously... I like the Ninth Gate too... and the 1993 version of the Three Musketeers was awesome... but then again... I WAS 13 so...

Posted by: Tammers at April 6, 2010 11:09 AM

I loved the 1973 version..

Feel old right now.

Posted by: Magiel at April 6, 2010 11:15 AM

(let us not speak of The Ninth Gate… ever)

Heyheyhey, now. I happen to love The Ninth Gate. I watch it whenever I come across it on cable. Johnny Depp being shifty, Frank Langella being coolly menacing, metric tonnes of creepy visuals--what's not to love?

Posted by: Jerce at April 6, 2010 11:33 AM

YES! So glad to see a defense of The Ninth Gate! No it wasn't stellar, and definitely not one of Depp's most nuanced performances, but I love the atmosphere, and that creepy blonde devil. That and the fact that Leno Olin can do anything she wants in my book from here until the end of film and I will love it.

Posted by: Smokin at April 6, 2010 11:48 AM

If I had to guess, I'd hazard that the love/hate schism regarding The Ninth Gate splits evenly among those who have read The Club Dumas and those who haven't, because while it may be a passable movie, it fucking butchered the absolutely amazing novel. Hence, my disdain.

We now return to your comment thread, already in progress.

Posted by: TK at April 6, 2010 11:52 AM

Obviously I'm going to have to read this.

Posted by: Smokin at April 6, 2010 11:53 AM

I read "Jumper 2: Jump With A Vengeance" and totally envisioned a futuristic "21 Jump Street: with a Vengeance" movie ... and I'm not sure I'm ok with that.

Posted by: Stella at April 6, 2010 1:20 PM

Oye Magiel!Do NOT feel old! After all, you simply could have watched the film on TCM like I did a while back!

Posted by: Four Eyes at April 6, 2010 1:30 PM

Alllllllll forrrrr onnneeee, and onnneee forrr alllllll.

And all ... forrrrr .... lurvvvvvvvvveeeeeee.

Posted by: Mick J at April 6, 2010 3:53 PM

Oh TK, thank you for putting a name to the actor I have always called "the uber gravely-voiced guy with the swords and the menacing. sometimes with a scar." Michael Wincott is far more conciser.

Posted by: coveredinbees at April 6, 2010 4:49 PM

Oh, how I love Michael Wincott.......

I'll be in my bunk.

Posted by: piedlourde at April 6, 2010 5:00 PM

At first glance of the header pic I thought this was going to be about Pirates of the Caribbean (#...11?). All three look like they're from that franchise. Does Hollywood have only one acceptable camera filter (grungy sepia/the great unwashed) to portray actiony period pieces?

I guess I should've put that gripe in the "I hate when that happens" thread.

Posted by: Ducky at April 6, 2010 5:14 PM

Hmmm.....I'm not in on the Cannonball read, but for El Club Dumas, I'd make an exception. My family got that book knowing nothing about it, and absolutely LOVED it. I loved it so much, I went and read it in Spanish. Never will I forget that moment of sitting in the theater, having gone to see Ninth Gate for Johnny Depp, without any foreknowledge of thee movie, and realizing that this was what Hollywood had made of one of my great favorites. They took a nuanced, literate, gem of a book and turned it into a movie that was like playing soccer with a lump of motherfucking coal! It is a movie fit for Tequila Nights, watched with less than half a brain while your neurons slowly pickle in liquor. Watching the movie knowing the book is like being told you get the opportunity to fuck...I dunno Nathan Fillion or Salma Hayek (or if you're Dustin- Ryan Reynolds) and you pull back the curtain ready for some luscious skin on skin action only to be presented with a GODSBEDAMNED skeleton. "Oh," says the oily proprietor, "We assure you that this is indeed the skeleton of your chosen partner, just behold the structure of the cheekbones." Looking closer, you realize that yes, you recognize the structure, and maybe you still want to go on with it, but that just makes you the sick twisted SOB who fucks skeletons.

Posted by: megaera at April 6, 2010 5:20 PM

Hahahaha, my least favorite thing about The Man in the Iron Mask was how everyone was supposed to be French, but they all had different accents. Thank you.

Posted by: Jelinas at April 6, 2010 7:13 PM

I can't look at Gerard Depardieu's face without smiling. If he and Pete Postlethwaite ever had a baby I think it could cure depression worldwide.

Posted by: James at April 7, 2010 3:25 AM