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The 2010 Kid's Choice Award Winners

By Dustin Rowles | Trade News | March 29, 2010 | Comments ()

By Dustin Rowles | Trade News | March 29, 2010 |


breaking_badss.jpg

What the hell is wrong with kids? Looking over the list of winners for Nickelodeon's Kids' Choice Awards, held over the weekend, you have to wonder if their brains are fully formed yet. What genuinely awful taste kids have in film and television. Nevermind just the winners, where's Meryl Streep among the nominees? Or Precious? Or Inglorious Basterds? What? Are they too pedestrian for "Breaking Bad" or "Mad Men"? Clearly, I just don't understand the younger generation. What's an iCarly, anyway?

Here's some advice that came to me while I was reading the list of winners: Next time you're out on the playground, hanging with the little ones, walk up to one of the kids and ask, "Who is your favorite couple?" If they mention anyone from the Twilight movies, just kill it*. Snuff it out. Give that snot-nosed crumb-snatching booger eater some mercy -- just squelch all the life out of it and save it from itself for the next 75 years to eternity (depending on future scientific breakthroughs).

The list of nominees is below. The winners are in italics.

(*Not an actual endorsement to murder. Some mild form of shaking ought to suffice.)

Favorite Couple
Edward and Bella
Jacob and Bella
Neytirl and Jake
Barack and Michelle Obama

Favorite TV Show
iCarly
Sonny With a Chance
The Suite Life on Deck
Wizards of Waverly Place

Favorite TV Actor
Cole Sprouse
Dylan Sprouse
Joe Jonas
Nick Jonas

Favorite TV Actress
Miranda Cosgrove
Miley Cyrus
Selena Gomez
Keke Palmer

Favorite Music Group
Black Eyed Peas
Coldplay
Jonas Brothers
Linkin Park

Favorite Female Singer
Beyonce
Miley Cyrus
Lady Gaga
Taylor Swift

Favorite Male Singer
Jay-Z
Sean Kingston
Mario
Ne-Yo

Favorite Song
"I Gotta Feeling", Black Eyed Peas
"Paparazzi", Lady Gaga
"Party in the USA", Miley Cyrus
"You Belong with Me", Taylor Swift

Favorite Movie
Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Squeakuel
Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen
The Twilight Saga: New Moon
X-Men Origins: Wolverine

Favorite Movie Actor
Zac Efron
Taylor Lautner
Shia LeBeouf
Tyler Perry

Favorite Movie Actress
Sandra Bullock
Miley Cyrus
Megan Fox
Zoe Saldana

Favorite Cartoon
The Penguins of Madagascar
Phineas and Herb
The Simpsons
SpongeBob Squarepants

Favorite Reality Show
American Idol
Are You Smarter Than a Fifth Grader?
Wipeout
So You Think You Can Dance?

Favorite Female Athlete
Danica Patrick
Misty May Treanor
Serena Williams
Venus Williams

Favorite Male Athlete
Kobe Bryant
LeBron James
Ryan Sheckler
Shaun White

Favorite Video Game
The Legend of Zelda: Spirit Tracks
Mario Kart
Wii Fit
Wii Sports Resort

Favorite Book
"Diary of a Wimpy Kid" series
"Twilight" series
"Vampire Diaries" series
"Where the Sidewalk Ends"

Favorite Animated Movie
A Christmas Carol
Ice Age: Dawn of the Dinosaurs
Monsters vs. Aliens
Up

Favorite Voice from an Animated Movie
Jim Carey, A Christmas Carol
Seth Rogen, Monsters vs Aliens
Ray Romano, Ice Age: Dawn of the Dinsosaurs
Reese Witherspoon, Monsters vs Aliens


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