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Neil Patrick Harris' Halloween Family Portrait Makes the Rest of Us Look Bad

By Dustin Rowles | Trade News | November 1, 2012 | Comments ()


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Damn you, NPH! Do you know how hard parents work every Halloween to make their adorable kids look even more adorable before their teeth fall out from all the candy? There are dozens of cute children hogging up all the attention on our Facebook feeds, and now we have to compete with this? Come on, brother, give the rest of us a chance. We don't all have 10 grand to spend on the perfect Halloween costume, or a make-up professional and costume designer to dress us. And even you and your husband are darling. Most parents barely have enough time to get their children into a costume so they can walk the streets and beg for candy for half an hour, much less get ourselves in one. Thunder stealers.

The 1% win at everything, even being adorable. I give up. Next year, it's a bandana and a stick -- my kids can dress as the hobos NPH clearly thinks the rest of us are.

I hate you, Doogie Howser.


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Comments Are Welcome, Jerks Will Be Banned


  • AM

    That's ridiculous. Ditto the picture going around of the Where the Wild Things Are family on the train. I taught high school for the past 6 years and THIS generation of teenagers already seems horrifically self-absorbed, indulged and generally over-celebrated by their parents. I shudder to think what the next generation of little Madisons and Hunters will be like. BARF.

  • Katylalala

    Gah, you need to go into a different field. Maybe you could look into being the replacement for Waldorf and Statler when they retire.

  • Makes me glad he's gay. Think of how bad we'd all look if he were to marry Heidi Klum. That'd ruin Halloween for all of us. October 31 would cease to be a day for costumes and candy and become a day where we all just felt completely inadequate. There would still be candy though.

  • L.O.V.E.

    I thought Patton Oswalt won parent/child Halloween.
    I can't keep track of all the cuteness.

    http://filmdrunk.uproxx.com/20...

  • Bert_McGurt

    Apparently Adam Savage helped him make it. It makes sense that those two would hang out.

  • BWeaves

    Come on, Dustin! You're telling me you didn't dress the twins up as Tootsie Rowles?

  • chanohack

    I take it from your rant that we're not getting a picture of what your twins wore last night?

  • Slash

    OMG, adorable ...

  • kilmo

    Those kids are the CUTEST. Look at their cheeks!!! They really look like David. Anywhoo, those costumes don't look.THAT expensive. I'm sure they paid a pretty a penny, but they seem easy to replicate

  • I usually just roll my eyes when baby pics start flooding my facebook...but I am a huuuuge sucker for babies in Halloween pictures. It kills me. Every time I think about how I don't want to have babies something inside me whispers "But think of how much fun you'll have dressing them up for Halloween! Eeeee!" and then I weaken a little bit.

  • Wednesday

    You can dress your pets up year round, and nobody laughs at you (out loud), and the pets don't care. Problem solved.

  • Katylalala

    How much do you sedate your pets to get them to not care about costumes? Because I tried to put my dog into a cow costume a few years ago and he was just not having it.

    If I put him in a horse costume should I use a horse tranquilizer, or should I put him in a cat costume and give him catnip? I suppose I could dress him as a cheeseburger and tell him to go eat himself when he starts getting crazy, but his handle on English is tenuous at best and he'll probably think I'm just telling him how amazing he is.

  • NateMan

    I laugh out loud. A lot.

  • DeltaJuliet

    And a rolling of the eyes, and you have me.

  • Kate at June

    I tell my husband constantly that October-December is a dangerous time for me. I'm usually perfectly happy with no children until I see the costumes.

  • John G.

    Is there a time/place on Facebook not flooded with baby photos? Please direct me to it, because that would be lovely.

  • NateMan

    Whenever a homophobic cock-knocker complains about gay marriage or adoption, the only thing we should have to do is hold up a picture of NPH's loving family. That man has (in my admittedly biased and limited knowledge of what their home life is actually like from interviews he has given and the pictures I've seen) exemplified what a father should be.

  • BWeaves

    I'll see your NPH and raise you an Alyson Hannigan and Alexis Denisof:

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvs...

    It's the male seahorse that gives birth, so the baby exploding out of Daddy's chest is perfectly anatomically correct.

  • NateMan

    I do not know if I could carry off an outfit that sparkly, even if my daughter begged me to. Alexis definitely wins.

  • chanohack

    Holy shit that's adorable. It's a close call...

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