When you’re just a middle-class white kid growing up in the suburbs of northern San Antonio, you’re constantly searching for answers and acceptance and guidance. It’s a tough world out there, and the pressures start to add up: You drown your sorrows in Old Navy, or you wonder whether it would be cooler to go to the Mama’s on 281 or Broadway. But there was one man who could always cut through the fog of confusion and give it to you straight, and that was Notorious B.I.G., no doubt. Biggie always laid it out plain for you to understand, and even today, his posthumous words ring true: The more money we come across the more problems we see. I only hope those words of caution will make their way to Fox Searchlight, who this week announced they’ve found the man who will breathe soon-to-be-extinguished life into the role of Biggie in their biopic. The chosen one is Jamal Woolard, a Brooklyn-based rapper who bears some similarities to Biggie: They were both (and I am actually not making this up) drug dealers before getting into music. Woolard signed with Warner Bros. in the late 1990s, proof that Ph.D. niggas will not in fact be able to hold him down, just like Biggie. The cast will also include Derek Luke as Sean “Back Then It Was Puffy” Combs, Angela Bassett as Biggie’s mom, Anthony Mackie as Tupac Shakur, and the entire United States of America as the lucky sonsofbitches who get to see this all come true.
And now for more stuff white people like: Seth Rogen will star in Observe and Report, a Warner Bros. comedy written and directed by Jody Hill. Rogen will play an arrogant mall cop who “squares off in a turf war against the local cops,” according to the logline the studio fed the trades. Hill’s only other is The Foot Fist Way, a comedy that made the festival circuit a couple years back and is set for a limited release this spring. I haven’t heard anything about it, but it co-stars Danny R. McBride, aka Bust-Ass from All the Real Girls, so it could have some moments. Plus, Rogen at this point can just be unleashed to do his thing with reckless abandon. No matter what, this one should be interesting.
Jim Carrey, whose spastic brand of comedy isn’t aging nearly as well as he probably wishes it was, is teaming up with director Jason Reitman for Pierre, Pierre at Fox Atomic. In the high-concept-ish comedy, Carrey will play a French nihilist who escorts a stolen Mona Lisa from Paris to London and winds up rediscovering his love for his homeland. The script is the first one in development for co-writers Edwin Cannistraci and Frederick Seton, so who the hell knows how this thing will go. But the smart money’s on Carrey acting “wacky” for 90 minutes while Reitman tries to rein things in with Belle & Sebastian tracks.
This morning’s trailer watch brings the latest clip for Iron Man, hitting theaters in May. I lost track of the metal riffs after a while. Anyway, here you go:
Also, here’s the trailer for Leatherheads, a decent-looking period comedy starring George Clooney, John Krasinski, and what’s left of Renee Zellweger. Enjoy:
Daniel Carlson is the managing editor of Pajiba and a low-level employee at a Hollywood industry magazine. You can visit his blog, Slowly Going Bald.
When I get home from work and can watch the Iron Man trailer with sound, I'll try to identify the metal tracks played in soundbite form for y'all.
Hang on... did I just beat B-Slim to the first comment?
*has heart attack*
Posted by: Dill The Devil at March 6, 2008 6:27 AM
Mmmm, Clooney and Krasinski? My my, that's a lovely image to wake up to....
Thank you, Dan!
Posted by: MO at March 6, 2008 6:39 AM
yet another cool-walk-away-while-explosion-goes-off-behind-you
*sigh*
Posted by: Thaf at March 6, 2008 7:12 AM
i asked about this a few weeks ago but i guess it got lost in the comment shuffle- has anyone heard anything more about Redbelt, the David Mamet film? It was mentioned in the trade round-up sometime last year. i just saw a trailer for it and it actually looks like it might be decent.
Posted by: causaubon at March 6, 2008 7:45 AM
Given it's Jon Favreau in the director's seat, Iron Man can still turn out royally ficked up, RDJ or not.
Cars driving : Fastfastfast-suddenly sloooooow! That textbook Bay crap.
Posted by: Adere at March 6, 2008 7:47 AM
Do people really still think Jim Carrey is funny?
Posted by: Cindy at March 6, 2008 7:48 AM
Given it's Jon Favreau in the director's seat, Iron Man can still turn out royally ficked up, RDJ or not.
Wow, that was a blindsiding. I mean, I know quite a few folks didn't like Elf or Zathura, but I thought they were quite good, direction-wise. Did I miss some terrible cinematic crime he committed?
First is "Back in Black" by AC/DC, second to last is "Cochise" by Audioslave, last is the guitar riff from "Iron Man" by Black Sabbath, naturally. There's one bit in the middle I couldn't catch, but that list is enough to make me say: "Metal", Dustin? Really? Cause, just, no. Maybe I can get behind that description for Black Sabbath but the other two bands barely even qualify as "hardcore" rock in my book.
And now back to not being a giant music nerd.
Posted by: Genny at March 6, 2008 8:22 AM
Verm: Ok, that was a bit harsh. Jon might be all right, his style never appealed to me, neither did it fill me with virulent hatred. I don't like the indifference I experience when I really want to like him. It's like a friend you'd want to perform better.
Posted by: Adere at March 6, 2008 8:24 AM
I mean Daniel, not Dustin.
I can read.
Posted by: Genny at March 6, 2008 8:39 AM
yet another cool-walk-away-while-explosion-goes-off-behind-you
Knowing Tony Stark, he timed the missile just so he would have just enough time to start walking away before it went off.
Posted by: twig at March 6, 2008 8:51 AM
ahh, the woes of middle-class san antonians. i'd say mama's on broadway.
Posted by: dg at March 6, 2008 8:51 AM
I'm super excited about Leatherheads. John Krasinski owes me after my mother and I sat through License to Wed *shudders*. Although maybe I should just be "cautiously optimistic" considering the aforementioned oeuvre.
But then again I think I could sit through two hours of Clooney and Krasinski just smiling at the screen. They're so hot and charming and swoon-worthy. *sigh* I miss The Office... April 10, April 10, April 10...
OK...
I must say I'm a little surprised y'all didn't post the new trailer for the Anna Nicole Smith "movie." I mean, it's not like you guys need any more evidence that the end is nigh, but ya know... for the masochists.
Also, as a suburban-grown white girl from the south who spends most of her free time web-designing and reading up on French politics... I could not be more stoked for the B.I.G. movie.
Posted by: Kayanne at March 6, 2008 9:04 AM
Adere: Well that is understandable. And if you want, I will be excited for you.
Leave it to George Clooney and Robert Downey Jr. to show us that yes folks, we are almost out of the apocalypse that is the shit season of films. One more month...
Posted by: Mike R. at March 6, 2008 9:15 AM
"First is "Back in Black" by AC/DC, second to last is "Cochise" by Audioslave, last is the guitar riff from "Iron Man" by Black Sabbath, naturally. There's one bit in the middle I couldn't catch..."
Okay, so there's one part left for me to identify, assuming some fellow hard-rockin' Pajiban doesn't beat to to the punch.
Genny: Yep, I'm also of the opinion that out of the three artists you identified, only the mighty Black Sabbath qualifies as metal. Not to take anything away from AC/DC, though - easily the best live band I've ever witnessed. Never been particularly fussed by Audioslave one way or the other.
Also, is B-Slim ill or something? I'm actually kinda worried.
Posted by: Dill The Devil at March 6, 2008 9:18 AM
Haven't heard anything from him since yesterday's battle....uh oh....
Posted by: Shadows of Dakaron at March 6, 2008 9:19 AM
I am hoping that the Leatherheads trailer leads to a commenter posting nekkid pictures of Krasinski, a la Bardem. Even just something shirtless that isn't the screen cap from Fun Run. Anyone? Anyone?
Kayanne - I watched the Anna Nicole trailer at Jezebel. It was everything I expected and so much more. Delusional, painful to watch, cheesy and mesmerizing at the same time. Fitting for the subject matter I suppose. Made me giggle.
Posted by: Dangle McGee at March 6, 2008 9:25 AM
I've been a lurker here at Pajiba for ages, but I had to post a shout out for San Antonio. dg has it right -- the one on Broadway is the way to go.
Posted by: Diana at March 6, 2008 9:28 AM
Dill: a-heee!
Genny: I think I just fell in love. Please tell me you are down with metal. Us ladies have to stick together, ya know.
Dill The Devil, I'm a wee bit too young to have caught AC/DC live, but I do respect them as a good rock band. I have seen Audioslave live, and while it was not my most treasured concert experience, they held their own. Also, Chris Cornell did some of Soundgarden's hits as an encore solo, so he gets nothing but goodwill for that. Anyway, good luck with the missing piece!
I was living right outside of DC when Biggie and Tupac were big (not the nice "right outside of DC", the shady part) so it made a big impression on me even though I was 10 at the time. I hope the movie does it justice. As for the Anna Nicole movie, as per the trailer at Jezebel, that movie will do that particular lady "justice", in a sense.
Posted by: Shadows of Dakaron at March 6, 2008 9:47 AM
Am I the only one who finds the concept of a Biggie movie ludicrous? For serious? Angela Bassett should be above this shit - she was m'fing TINA TURNER. Jeezy Creezy.
BSlim? No clue. I was busy camping out at the whiskey fountain with boo and SoD.
"...and the entire United States of America as the lucky sonsofbitches who get to see this all come true"
Okay, I hope you weren't kidding. Because as a suburban-bred white girl with lots of white girl pain, I am actually spasmatically and ridiculously excited about the prospect of this biopic.
However, just so we are clear: I'd side with the west coast every time, because I have some serious loyalty to my man Tupac.
Posted by: tt_marie at March 6, 2008 9:54 AM
boo I'm down with all good music regardless of genre. So, metal, rock, hardcore rock, pop, rap, whatever, if it's done well I'll listen to it. I can identify a healthy amount of early Metallica, some Pantera and Slayer, and almost always Black Sabbath within a verse.
And yes, us ladies do have to stick together, otherwise we'll get killed in a mosh pit which nearly happened to me at a Flogging Mollys show last summer.
Posted by: Genny at March 6, 2008 9:54 AM
Ah, true, I was....distracted...at the time...
Posted by: Shadows of Dakaron at March 6, 2008 9:55 AM
"And yes, us ladies do have to stick together, otherwise we'll get killed in a mosh pit which nearly happened to me at a Flogging Mollys show last summer."
Oh, awesome...rocker chicks rule! And rocker chicks who hold their own in mosh pits?!?! Or at least participate. Glad you got out of it alive, Genny...I personally stay out of them now out of fear of having to kill someone if they hit me one more damn time...
I always liked Tupac more than Biggie...no offense to east coast. And it wasn't a matter of I thought he was more real or anything, I just liked his music more, it seemed more melodic.
Posted by: Shadows of Dakaron at March 6, 2008 10:00 AM
Genny: HA! So true. Funny story to follow:
Of all the metal shows I've been to (a lot of very heavy shit; my husband was a heavy metal radio DJ, and my bro has not one, but two death metal bands) the one where I was the most damaged:
I've seen the Iron Man trailer about ten times now, and I am fully and completely erect about seeing the movie. Robert Downey, Jr., Terence Howard . . . The Suit? I'm ready. So ready.
Posted by: socalledonlycousins at March 6, 2008 10:04 AM
Re: Jim Carey - I still think he's funny every time I turn on Ace Ventura: When Nature Calls. I can't help it. I know it's idiotic and low-brow, but it never fails to make me laugh.
"There's someone on the wing! Some... THING! I'm sorry, what were you saying?" Tee hee!
Posted by: tt_marie at March 6, 2008 10:06 AM
Does anyone know how to get zombie brains out of fabric? These are my favorite jeans, and they're a mess.
I'm a Tupac girl all the way. *feels need to watch Poetic Justice* (shut it)
Posted by: Nicole at March 6, 2008 10:12 AM
IRONMAN!!!
Shit, I never even read the comics when I was a kid, I mean, I knew who he was and all, but DAMN, that shit looks tight.
Posted by: some Guy at March 6, 2008 10:12 AM
There was a battle?
Check the DVD releases thread...just watch your step.
Posted by: Shadows of Dakaron at March 6, 2008 10:17 AM
[runs in panting}
Did somebody say 'erect'?
Posted by: Kolby at March 6, 2008 10:27 AM
You haven't heard Iron Man at its best until you have seen it done live. It does rock. Black Sabbath is the only band of those 3 that are true metal. Audioslave for me is a take it or leave it band. I like Chris Cornell well enough, but eh. AC/DC I would have loved to seen live.
Boo 2 death metal band? That's awesome.
And yes, us ladies do have to stick together, otherwise we'll get killed in a mosh pit which nearly happened to me at a Flogging Mollys show last summer. By Genny
That must have been a great show. For me it was the pits at Saliva in a tiny theater that held maybe 400 people. The entire floor was a pit. It was awesome.
Posted by: Melody at March 6, 2008 10:31 AM
More and more I'm finding more like minds on this site than I'm used to finding anywhere. You give me hope that there are people out there who are cool and open-minded and yet still revel in their geekiness. People I can relate to and be friends with and can have intelligent conversations with and even possibly date someday.
I guess what I'm trying to say is...you're making me not hate people as much as I used to. Stop it.
Posted by: Shadows of Dakaron at March 6, 2008 10:36 AM
Unidentified song #2 is Hell Above Water by Curve.
Posted by: Stew at March 6, 2008 10:36 AM
:loves Kolby:
I can't vouch for B-Slim's safety either, I was too busy drinking with Smithy and tt_marie and riding the mechanical bull. Word to the wise, let someone else have a turn after an hour, my ass is going to be sore for a month.
On topic: IRON MAN, EEE!!!
Posted by: Julie at March 6, 2008 10:39 AM
socalled, I missed it too *sob*
Wanna start a bitch-fight so we can feel special too?
I predict seven online commenter's suicides within the next 15 minutes.
Posted by: Adere at March 6, 2008 10:41 AM
I cannot ever again support anything that might remotely have anything to do with Tupac. I saw him do a show in the Bronx. It was an unmitigated clusterfuck of a production. He was 4 hours late going on stage and then performed only about 5 songs. There were so many of his boys on stage that he had an area of about 3 square feet to perform. AND THEN...he went off on the girl he and his crew had recently been accused of raping - essentially saying that it was not only her own fault, but that by reporting it to the police she had turned on her own people. It was disgusting.
Posted by: Smello at March 6, 2008 10:42 AM
"...my ass is going to be sore for a month."
I'm so not going there.
"Michael Bay set to remake Rosemary's Baby"
[pulls out sword to commit seppuku]
Posted by: Shadows of Dakaron at March 6, 2008 10:44 AM
...One down...
(Can I have yr records?)
Posted by: Adere at March 6, 2008 10:47 AM
I really need to know what kind of whiskey is in the fountain.
Why do all of the good comments start on a Wednesday? I have classes all day!
Dammit...
Posted by: Melody at March 6, 2008 10:47 AM
Ha! Even when I'm not trying I'm dirty :(
Michael Bay set to remake Rosemary's Baby"
Jesus fucking Antichrist. Is Rosemary going to get knocked up with demon spawn by Nicholas Cage on an asteroid as it hurtles towards two cops slowly pulling out their guns?
Posted by: Julie at March 6, 2008 10:49 AM
[halts in mid-thrust]
Uhh...sure, I guess
Posted by: Shadows of Dakaron at March 6, 2008 10:49 AM
Melody and Genny: You guys do know AC/DC are still a going concern, right? There's a new album supposed to be out sometime this year, after which I imagine we can expect some touring. I saw them with Queens Of The Stone Age and The Offspring at the Milton Keynes bowl about four or five years ago (I've been drinking since then), and I can honestly say that even if it takes selling your body to get hold of a ticket, you won't regret it afterwards.
Also, Melody - a resounding hell yeah on needing to hear Iron Man live. I saw the original line-up playing it at Ozzfest 2001. A truly awe-inspiring moment.
Boo: Your brother has two death metal bands? I'm still struggling to find a bass player for mine, whilst cracking a whip over my drummer to get him playing blastbeats at 220bpm.
Posted by: Dill The Devil at March 6, 2008 10:51 AM
Shit. Now TK is REALLY going to blow up the internet.
Posted by: Nicole at March 6, 2008 10:54 AM
Smello - Tupac always struck me as a complete asshole.
Posted by: samantha t at March 6, 2008 10:59 AM
Yes, Julie. It is then that the shit will get real.
I'm just confused how Bay seems to have started a one-man remakes business. I'm not offended so much as puzzled (Never did see "Con Air" but I did enjoy "Ghost Rider" and I'd do it again. Sam Elliott makes everything go down smoother).
I like the rumored universe building of the new Marvel movies casting. I'm glad the JLA's gone turnaround as it'd just be a mess at this point.
Is post-"Cuckoo" Curve recommended? I haven't followed them since their return.
Oh, hey, since you guys were wondering - I have what's left of BSlim in my purse. I told him not to step to this.
Posted by: Kolby at March 6, 2008 11:01 AM
Oh God! Yet ANOTHER French Nihilist high concept comedy! When will Hollywood stop pandering to the lowest common denominator?
Today's question for my brain is: does immense Clooney love (lust?) cancel out extreme Zellweger loathing?
Posted by: PaddyDog at March 6, 2008 11:08 AM
I have what's left of BSlim in my purse
Maybe it's just this kinda morning...cuz that sounded dirty too. And slightly not rated for children.
Seriously, who does Bay think he is? Stick to cheesy action movies...you don't see John Woo remaking The Seven Samurai! He knows what he can do well, and what his audience expects from him, and he delivers it well. Next thing you know, McG is gonna remake/sequel Terminator without Ahnuld, and the Farrelly Brothers will write the screenplay to the Three Stooges movie...
Posted by: Shadows of Dakaron at March 6, 2008 11:09 AM
Am I the only one who finds the concept of a Biggie movie ludicrous? For serious? Angela Bassett should be above this shit - she was m'fing TINA TURNER. Jeezy Creezy.
Nicole, I thought that, too. It feels like this is something they're going to hype to death, but the movie won't live up to it.
As for Angela Bassett, I'm just happy that she's working steadily again. I'm more depressed about her being in a Tyler Perry film than the Tupac/Biggie film.
I think that when he's in the right element, Jim Carrey is still funny, but I can't tolerate a whole movie with him doing some bogus French accent. He's enough of a character, that's just overkill.
Shadows as a wee little 5'4", 110 pound girl, I can assure you that I was not attempting to actively take part in the mosh pit. However, as I discovered at the Anti-Flag set at HFStival 2006, mosh pits like to follow me. I've been saved more than once by the kindness of strangers. Also, color me jealous that you've see QotSA live.
And yes, Flogging Molly was awesome. And aww, all the rockers have come out of the woodwork. Makes me all warm and fuzzy inside.
Posted by: Genny at March 6, 2008 11:12 AM
Today's question for my brain is: does immense Clooney love (lust?) cancel out extreme Zellweger loathing?
Normally that wouldn't be enough for me, but when you add football and John "stalking can have positive outcomes sometimes, right?" Krasinksi I can relegate Colonoscopy Face to the background.
Posted by: Julie at March 6, 2008 11:13 AM
Angela Bassett should have been Storm, rather than that vacuous catball-retchwoman.
Posted by: Shadows of Dakaron at March 6, 2008 11:14 AM
Uh, speaking of Robert Downey Jr. He's staring in a Ben Stiller flick where he plays a white man playing a black man "in the most expensive Vietnam War film ever."
Huh... I feel like I should have known about that before this very moment. *starts to have flashbacks of Soul Man and shivers* I need a hug...
Posted by: Kayanne at March 6, 2008 11:15 AM
Thank you for those previews. It is pretty damn funny to watch Renee Zellwhatever trying to crack a smile, or even make a "normal" face. Her face wrangler must have been only part-time on that movie. That said, I never saw the John Krasinski thing but him and George Clooney?!?!?! I could not be more excited!
Except I am. For motherfucking Iron Man. Hot damn! I have very high hopes for Robert Downey Jr. Although I guess there's always Gwyneth "My face isn't as pinched as Renee Zellwhatever's" Paltrow to bring me back down to earth. I love me a good superhero movie, and this looks better than many.
Posted by: Anne (in Reno) at March 6, 2008 11:17 AM
as a wee little 5'4", 110 pound girl
Hehe...oops, didn't know that Genny. Now I'm really glad you survived. I'm not the one who mentioned QotSA above, but I have seen them. Great show.
Posted by: Shadows of Dakaron at March 6, 2008 11:17 AM
About Tupac:
I truly believe the fame got to him (and probably the narcotics didn't help either). If you look at his music, his interviews, and his poetry, you see him changing dramatically as he garnered more and more popularity, especially in the period leading up to his incarceration. After he finished serving time, he seemed humbled and a bit, and I gained back some respect for him.
I know you can't always allow a man's past to be an excuse for his behavior, but he went through and saw some very difficult stuff in his short lifetime.
Overall, I think he was a brilliant, talented man with a lot of depth and good intentions, at least at the start. He just took a wrong turn or two (how many of us don't?) and got too caught up in himself and in his image for a while.
I'm not saying we should all revere him or anything; I just think he's an interesting character and created some unique and compelling music. And I think he had the capability to do a lot more if he had more time on this earth.
I can't believe I actually care so much about this. Yes, I'm a loser.
And anyway, the movie's about Biggie, not Tupac.
Posted by: tt_marie at March 6, 2008 11:23 AM
Shit. Sorry, Darkness that was Dill. Apologies to both parties. I'm losing track while trying to block out the talk about the remake which is NOT HAPPENING. THERE IS NO REMAKE. I'm going to my denial corner now. That's where Heath Ledger serves me tea and asks me how my day as an independently wealthy world traveller is going.
Posted by: Genny at March 6, 2008 11:24 AM
"Colonoscopy Face"? Julie, I love it!!
TK, sweetie, if you keep killing people every time a gut-wrenchingly bad movie idea is announced, you'll have no playmates left. Now, go cuddle a puppy and try to forget the horror.
Posted by: MO at March 6, 2008 11:27 AM
Crap, I'm missing everything this week. Stoopid clients! [/kicks ground, Opie Taylor style]
I've got my wedding to plan, my bride to murder, and Guildur to frame for it. I'm swamped!
Posted by: socalledonlycousins at March 6, 2008 11:27 AM
Genny, can I join you in the denial corner? Is W still president there?
Posted by: Julie at March 6, 2008 11:28 AM
At this point this is way off topic, but I'm going to try to work "Also my right hindquarter" into every conversation I have today.
Posted by: Groundloop at March 6, 2008 11:31 AM
Socalled: Nice.
Posted by: Julie at March 6, 2008 11:32 AM
Biggie smalls inspired me at the tender age of 6 years old with this classic gem:
I grew up, a fucking screw-up
Got introduced to the game,
Got an ounce and fucking blew up
Choppin rocks overnight
The nigga Biggie Smalls
Tryin to turn into the black Frank White
I hope the movie does this hero/poet justice.
Posted by: JustKyle at March 6, 2008 11:32 AM
"Michael Bay set to remake Rosemary's Baby"
Really. Well.
That's interesting.
[begins setting charges]
Make peace with your Gods, people.
Ah, poop. And I was sooo patiently waiting for new episodes of quality shows to return. Sheesh.
I've got my wedding to plan, my bride to murder, and Guildur to frame for it. I'm swamped!
Just the movie quote I needed to get through this day, Mr. Cousins. Bravo.
Posted by: Kayanne at March 6, 2008 11:33 AM
as a wee little 5'4", 110 pound girl
What is it with smaller girls and mosh pits? I am the same size as you and I agree, mosh pits do find the smaller people. I think that it is for the crowd surfing ability of the smaller ones. Easier to move.
I was at Ozzfest 97 and 98 and one of those was when I heard "Iron Man" and "Paranoid" live. It was awesome. Tool is also a great live show. I almost got pulled into the Rob Zombie pit the second year I went.
This was pre-Obsornes people. Ozzy was still relevant then.
AC/DC is not the original lineup,though, right? That is cool about a new album.
Posted by: Melody at March 6, 2008 11:34 AM
Julie, you are welcome in the denial corner, where Hillary and Obama have teamed up to be Co-Presidents after a specially held early election on the basis of "lets get this shit over with already". He makes the inspiring speeches, she deals with the nitty gritty. Also we have Sangria.
Posted by: Genny at March 6, 2008 11:35 AM
I've got my wedding to plan, my bride to murder, and Guildur to frame for it. I'm swamped!
Hey, that's what I had planned...
Posted by: Shadows of Dakaron at March 6, 2008 11:35 AM
I've got my wedding to plan, my bride to murder, and Guildur to frame for it. I'm swamped!
Hey, that's what I had planned...
ONE day into our engagement and you're already planning to kill me?! Patience is a virtue Shadows.
Genny: Sangria and Obabma...SWEET.
Posted by: Julie at March 6, 2008 11:39 AM
mmm...sangria...can I come?
Posted by: Shadows of Dakaron at March 6, 2008 11:40 AM
Obabma is his real name.
Posted by: Julie at March 6, 2008 11:40 AM
I want to go to the denial corner, but I will have to bring my limoncello.
I love the Co-Pres idea. At this point, I say either a Rock, Paper, Scissors match or flip a frickin' coin. It is already gotten old.
Posted by: Melody at March 6, 2008 11:42 AM
Ah shit! I was all set to pack and join you in the denial corner, but much as I love Obama, Josiah Bartlett is still President in my denial corner.
Posted by: PaddyDog at March 6, 2008 11:43 AM
Awww....Julie, baby....I'm just kidding! Seriously!
(We are drinking out of each other's cups at the wedding, right?)
Posted by: Shadows of Dakaron at March 6, 2008 11:43 AM
Who's doing what to Rosemary's Baby? I... what? That's an excellent film, so... what the hell kinda... Why's my face getting wet? What the...?!
Congrats, Mr. Bay. You actually made me weep. Not weep of happy, but weep of sadness... I've not weeped the weep of sadness in many moons...
But soon the sadness weep will pass. And unbridled rage will take its place. Many have made the list - oh, yes - many have made the list. But you sir, YOU have made it to the top of that list. And you will now also weep.
However, your weep will be the weep of "Wow, somebody's playing Radar Love at an exceptionally loud volu...holy SHIT, is that a flaming tank crashing through my... oh my GOD, is that a half-formed conjoined twin with a flaming plasma... SWEATER-VEST ZOMBIES?! What the... I smell whiskey and napalm and... a.... why is that baby in a ninja... GAAHH - SWEETBLEEDINGMOSES - NOOOOO!!!!"
Yeah, that's your weep. You friggin' douchebag...
Posted by: Skittimus Maximus at March 6, 2008 11:43 AM
I'm suspecting that I will have to expand the Denial Corner to include all the Pajibans soon. Guess I'll have to have Heath call Taylor Kitsch and Javier Bardem to assist with the drink pouring.
Now I have to go be a real student. Damn.
Posted by: Genny at March 6, 2008 11:44 AM
Yeaaahhh!! I'm going to see QotSA in May and can't wait!!
Genny: as a 5'1(ish) 110lb girl I am glad to see you made it out alive. Pray for me, I'll be going in whether I want to or not. They're playing in a tiny venue.
(We are drinking out of each other's cups at the wedding, right?)
Only because I've built up an immunity to iocane powder >:(
Paddy: I forgot (blasphemy) all about Jeb Bartlett, he's president here instead!
Posted by: Julie at March 6, 2008 11:48 AM
Guess I'll have to have Heath call Taylor Kitsch and Javier Bardem to assist with the drink pouring.
Genny, can he call Ryan Reynolds as well? Because...do me, Ryan.
Posted by: Julie at March 6, 2008 11:51 AM
I actually don't find a Biggie biopic ludicrous, given that he's widely regarded as one of the most talented hip-hop musicials of all time and died an untimely, suspicious death that was the result of in-fighting in the hip-hop community.
Posted by: samantha t at March 6, 2008 11:51 AM
Today's question for my brain is: does immense Clooney love (lust?) cancel out extreme Zellweger loathing?
Yes, Paddy Dog. It even made her look like she had gained a healthy 15 pounds. Swooning over Clooney seems a little cliched now, but he still gets me every time.
"I love it when you call me Big Papa..." Best song ever.
Posted by: katy at March 6, 2008 12:09 PM
tt_marie - I don't disagree with your Tupac analyis. He was incrediably talented. I was a big fan until that concert. However, hearing him say those things and seeing how the crowd reacted to them was just too much. It was a crowd full of kids who hung on his every word and wanted to be just like him. And he ended his rant with, "Fuck that bitch." At which time the crowd went wild. For me, there is a line between the Thug Life persona used to sell records and the real man. He crossed it.
As to the mosh pit part of these comments, I feel ya' my shorter than average sisters. I learned many moons ago at a Rancid concert that 5'2" (on a good day) is just too short. More recently at Metallica concert, I learned that I am still too short and now too old.
Posted by: Smello at March 6, 2008 12:12 PM
Katy:
I know what you're getting at, but swooning over Cary Grant is still valid after 50 odd years and I place Clooney firmly in that class (despite the vapid clothes-hanger he's been toting around town lately).
Posted by: PaddyDog at March 6, 2008 12:14 PM
Re: Javier Bardem. Ah, honestly, I just lost a lot of respect for him, and for Natalie Portman last night in an "unfortunate incident", i.e., the viewing of a certian film called Goya's Ghosts.
I was willing to stay up really late (on a work day!) to watch it - because I was excited! I mean, Javier and Natalie, what could go wrong!?! Right? WRONG. Dead wrong.
Anyone seen this flaming sack of shit?
Posted by: tt_marie at March 6, 2008 12:20 PM
Angela Bassett should have been Storm, rather than that vacuous catball-retchwoman.
Yes, Shadows, she should have been. I have nothing against Halle Berry, but Storm was a role that was made for Angela Bassett. I don't think anyone else could've done it justice. But she turned it down; along with Monster's Ball. Brilliant actress, but let's face it; she hasn't made the best career choices.
Posted by: Brie at March 6, 2008 12:29 PM
When my namesake King of the Crossfader gets HIS movie, THEN you can do this!
But then I've never liked rap, too dirgey for me, so this isn't my movie. Oh, whither Bomb Squad?
Holy fuzzy baby bunnies, SkittiMax, "Sweater-vest Zombies" is right up there with "Whiskeybabyninjastar!" in the ranks of cool Pajiban expressions!
Posted by: MO at March 6, 2008 12:40 PM
I feel ya' my shorter than average sisters
Yessss. I'm usually referred to as "taller than your average midget"
Posted by: Wormer at March 6, 2008 12:54 PM
Ginny: I had to miss Flogging molly this go round grr! They do have an awesome mosh pit! I had to stop going in after the Black Flag/Rollins Band show. Even my Doc's couldn't help me in there! It was still awesome tho!
Posted by: trixie at March 6, 2008 12:59 PM
Only because I've built up an immunity to iocane powder
Man...can I propose again? Your geek cred just keeps going up.
Posted by: Shadows of Dakaron at March 6, 2008 1:00 PM
Wormer I'll pray for your toes. Trust me, they will take the brunt of the beating.
I'm actually exactly average height for a woman, but since mosh pits are mostly male that doesn't help me.
I'd be happy to add Ryan Reynolds to the Denial Corner, but I fear some Male Pajibans are going to start complaining about gender inequality among the eye candy so any suggestions from the Manjibans?
Posted by: Genny at March 6, 2008 1:06 PM
AC/DC can't be the original lineup- isn't Bon Scott dead? And Genny and Melody - rock on, ladies! Ever notice how when you're shorter and in the midst of larger people, the air gets thin down where we dwell?
SO stoked for Iron Man. I love me some Robert Downey Jr. But I don't understand how Michael Bay is going to remake Rosemary's Baby. Last I checked, nothing blew up in that movie. Perhaps the building will turn into a Decepticon controlled by the devil worshippers and her husband's long lost best friend will save her, the demon spawn will turn out to be the Second Coming, thereby tricking the Devil and she'll fall madly in love with the BF, the Decepticon gets taken out by a giant meteor that miraculously doesn't blow up anything else and they all live happily ever after.
Posted by: Captain Steve at March 6, 2008 1:10 PM
Yes, Cary Grant *sigh*
Especially in To Catch A Thief. The car, the house, the man. Is there more to a perfect life?
Posted by: katy at March 6, 2008 1:12 PM
I thought Bon Scott was dead, but I did not want to say it but then be wrong.
Michael Bay = Rosemary's Baby
I am glad to inform everyone, but that does not compute.
Posted by: Melody at March 6, 2008 1:17 PM
That should have said "I am sad to inform" not glad.
$20 says Nicholas Cage appears here.
Posted by: Melody at March 6, 2008 1:18 PM
I want Michael Bay in the Denial Corner.
Gas prices are a bitch and it'd be a helluva lot handier to have him right there within throat-punching distance...
Posted by: Skittimus Maximus at March 6, 2008 1:28 PM
"...so any suggestions from the Manjibans?"
Kate Winslet and Rosario Dawson would work for me.
Posted by: Shadows of Dakaron at March 6, 2008 1:31 PM
Captain Steve and Melody: Bon Scott is indeed pushing up the daisies - the rest of the band found his vocal doppelganger in one Brian Johnson. Besides which, they replaced bassist Mark Evans with Cliff Williams in 1977 after the release of their first album, High Voltage. The drummer, Phil Rudd, buggered off in 1980, only to return 11 years later. There was a different singer before they recorded their debut also, but history has consigned him to the 'Whoops, Missed Your Chance' file.
Posted by: Dill The Devil at March 6, 2008 1:45 PM
Kate and Rosario seem like they'd be cool to have around. They're in.
Posted by: Genny at March 6, 2008 2:18 PM
Wow. Robert Downey Jr. is freaking BUFF in Iron Man! How hard did he have to work to get those shoulders? Rawr. Tony Stark indeed.
I just hope the trailer isn't the best thing about the movie. I've been fooled before.
Re: BIG movie...Damn, I wanted to get famous spitting rhymes first, THEN turn to drug dealing. I got it all bassackwards.
Posted by: numchuck at March 6, 2008 2:23 PM
I want Posh Spice in the denial corner, because I think she goes there a lot anyway. You know, every time she says, "I've never had any plastic surgery."
Okay, I know what you're saying but if NotSoPosh Spice ends up in the same corner as me, I'll end up tearing her starved little frame, osteoporotic limb from osteoporotic limb. Bitch annoys me no end. Are you all comfortable with a rabid murderer in your corner? Coz, I can just form my own seething-with-anger corner over here. I'm sure PissBoy will come and visit.
Posted by: PaddyDog at March 6, 2008 2:56 PM
Damn, I am soooo pumped for Iron Man! I've watched that trailer before, but seeing it again make me want to go, like, punch a puppy or a small child...Arrggghh!!!!
Posted by: Nadha at March 6, 2008 3:13 PM
Man...can I propose again? Your geek cred just keeps going up.
Of course you can...I don't want no bullshit diamond though, I want an engagement trip to Greece, a pet tiger, and tickets to Avenue Q. Nothing says newly engaged like spanikopida, vulgar puppets, and jungle cats.
Posted by: Julie at March 6, 2008 3:42 PM
I am afraid to get excited about Iron Man as it seems to me to be a movie best summarized by thr trailer. Because Iron Man has never really been a very dramatically-consistent comic (unlike Spiderman or X-Men), I have this fear that there's no way to make 2 hours of movie worth sitting through.
However, I could watch the trailer all day. "This isn't the worst thing you've ever caught me doing" is very Downey, very Stark. And the armor is awsome.
Posted by: Hater from SIloam SPrings at March 6, 2008 3:47 PM
Julie, I just bought Mrs. TK Avenue Q tix for her b-day. I'm soooo psyched.
Holy fuzzy baby bunnies, SkittiMax, "Sweater-vest Zombies" is right up there with "Whiskeybabyninjastar!" in the ranks of cool Pajiban expressions!
Do I smell another option for our soon-to-be-debuted Pajiba t-shirt line? I'm really going to need to start saving some money so that I can buy one of everything.
Oh, speaking of such things, BSlim re: your "capitalist pigs" accusation on the WBNS! t-shirt thread, don't act like you haven't pre-ordered 16 shirts and bumper stickers! 'Cause you're not foolin' anyone. Also, I hope that you are alive and well, your absence is palpable and making me a little sad.
Posted by: tamatha at March 6, 2008 4:37 PM
I want an engagement trip to Greece, a pet tiger, and tickets to Avenue Q. Nothing says newly engaged like spanikopida, vulgar puppets, and jungle cats.
Hehe...the Lady or the Tiger? Hmmm....
Posted by: Shadows of Dakaron at March 6, 2008 4:41 PM
Iron Man looks tight. I hope and pray it doesn't suck. If it does, look out - 'cause I'm building my own Iron Skitz suit... Actually, it's not really iron... it's more like a bunch of unused aluminum siding wire-wrapped and stapled to an old aluminum trash can. It's got DD flashlights and a kitchen timer too - so you can see exactly how long it takes for my awesomeness to Blow. Your. Mind. (...cue music...)
Iron Skitz, Iron Skitz,
My loomnum suit's the coolest shit
A couple dents, a little rust
A ice-chilled booze-tube is a must
Look out!
Here comes the Iron Skitz
(...cue pyrotechnics and inflatable gorilla...)
My loomnum suit, it's bullet-proof
Can't get hurt jumpin' off the roof
If I pass out, it don't fall down
Punching hobo... what?
Whaddya mean it's the Spider-Man song? No it's not - it's MY song. I just made it... Spider-Man doesn't have his own goddam... Seriously? The Ramones even covered it, huh? You don't say...
You gotta admit though - it was cool while it lasted...
Posted by: Skittimus Maximus at March 6, 2008 5:20 PM
inflatable gorilla? Skitt, you crack me up.
Posted by: Shadows of Dakaron at March 6, 2008 5:30 PM
Hehe...the Lady or the Tiger? Hmmm....
Hee! ...BOTH.
TK, that's a great gift, I hope you both have fun!
Posted by: Julie at March 6, 2008 5:32 PM
Iron Skitz, Iron Skitz,
My loomnum suit's the coolest shit
A couple dents, a little rust
A ice-chilled booze-tube is a must
Look out!
Here comes the Iron Skitz
(...cue pyrotechnics and inflatable gorilla...)
My loomnum suit, it's bullet-proof
Can't get hurt jumpin' off the roof
If I pass out, it don't fall down
Punching hobo... what?
AH ha ha ha ha ha!!! :reads lyrics again: Ha ha ha!
Posted by: Julie at March 6, 2008 5:34 PM
Seems to me like the Denial Corner is going to get crowded. Maybe it was built using Time Lord science? Bigger on the inside?
I think that we should add Pajiba sweatervests to the collection.
I didn't know that Bassett turned down Monster's Ball. Where's your groove now, Stella?
Posted by: Nicole at March 6, 2008 6:17 PM
Friday Night Lights lives!?! Can't...breathe...
Also: Bartlet for America! Bartlet's been my president since January of 2001.
Posted by: BiblioGeek at March 6, 2008 10:21 PM
I was very anxious that Jon Favreau was doing this movie. Nothing against him really but I wondered if he could make it as great as it should be. I've been into Iron Man since childhood and it would kill me if it sucked. I've got to say that I've been blown away by the trailers. And RDJ is perfect as Tony Stark. I'm still a little nervous [see Hater from SIloam SPrings/numchuck's comments above] but now I think it's going to be awesome.
When I get home from work and can watch the Iron Man trailer with sound, I'll try to identify the metal tracks played in soundbite form for y'all.
Hang on... did I just beat B-Slim to the first comment?
*has heart attack*