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subhead / Dustin Rowles

Trade News | July 10, 2009 | Comments (30)

I’m so torn. Which banal piece of industry news do I cover now? There’s a new movie poster for Jennifer’s Body

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as well as an image from Fangoria of Megan Fox with some really bad canker sores


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and even a new green-band trailer for the film

But none of that seems particularly worth writing about.

How about this: Zooey Deschanel has joined Natalie Portman, James Franco, and Danny McBride in David Gordon Green’s Your Highness, about an arrogant, lazy prince (McBride) who must complete a quest to save his father’s kingdom. Joining him on the quest is his more heroic brother (James Franco). Deschanel plays Belladonna, Franco’s virginal bride, and Portman plays McBride’s love interest, a warrior princess.

We’ve already discussed that movie a few times, and the addition of Deschanel hardly seems worth the effort it would take to post it here. So, that’s out.

But then there’s the fact that Mel Gibson is negotiating to star in The Beaver replacing Jim Carrey who replaced Steve Carrel. Directed by Jodie Foster (who replaced Jay Roach), The Beaver is about a guy (Gibson) with a beaver hand puppet that he treats like a real person. Foster will play Gibson’s wife.

So, basically, it’s Lars and the Real Beaver. And even though it’s based on Kyle Killen’s much lauded script (last year’s top spot on the Black List), I’m still having trouble working up any enthusiasm.

So, failing to find anything of interest to write about, I think I’ll just skip this post all together.


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Comments

SEE SEE it is so clever and witty because there is a hand in the desk. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
HELL YES HAHAHAHAHAHHAHHA

When the fuck is Mandy Lane going to be available.

Posted by: badalamenti at July 10, 2009 10:57 AM

I am so glad that Danny McBride's career is gaining momentum. Sure, he may play sort of the same guy in everything, like Seth Rogan, but his delivery and style is so hilarious.

Posted by: Snath at July 10, 2009 10:58 AM

Hmm, that last piece sounds like the perfect opportunity for a MATH EQUATION!!! WOOOO! MATH EQUATION DAY!!!!

IF:

Steve Carrell > Jim Carey + Mel Gibson

Mel Gibson

Jodie Foster=Beaver

THEN: we can conclude that +his mo>ie wi11 5uck.

Posted by: boo at July 10, 2009 11:01 AM

am i the only one who thinks Megan Fox looks like Mila Kunis in that poster?

I realize this is highly insulting to Mila. But Megan shouldn't be stealing her look!

Posted by: lizzieborden at July 10, 2009 11:01 AM

badalamenti:

Get yourself a region-free DVD player and order it from the UK. Or Australia. Bafflingly, it's even out here, although to UK disc has more features. Which is to say a dull, five minute interview with Amber Heard. But it's something.

So, did she write "Hell Yes" on the board, or did someone else? Was it the hand coming out of the desk? So many questions!

Posted by: Simon A at July 10, 2009 11:05 AM

damn, i lost a part:

Mel Gibson

ok, NOW that should make sense

*runs away cackling insanely*

Posted by: boo at July 10, 2009 11:05 AM

You want some freaking news? I'm 50 TODAY. I made it. I didn't die. Yet. It's my birthday and I'll cry if I want to, cry if I want to, cry if I want to. You would cry to if it happened to you. Personally, I don't know how the hell 50 happened. I swear I was 30 yesterday.

Posted by: BWeaves at July 10, 2009 11:08 AM

Happy Fucking 50th BWeaves! Here's to your mid-life crisis!

*upends the tequila bottle*

*again*

Posted by: boo at July 10, 2009 11:13 AM

Happy 50th birthday BWeaves!!

Posted by: Julie at July 10, 2009 11:15 AM

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BWEAVES!!

I seriously think they give us a drug at about 32 or so and next thing we know, we wake up in our forties with husbands and mortgages that have all just been slotted into place while we slept. There is no other possible explanation for it.

Posted by: PaddyDog at July 10, 2009 11:17 AM

So you're 42 years older than George?

Posted by: Kballs at July 10, 2009 11:23 AM

Heppy Birfdey BWeaves!

Posted by: Snath at July 10, 2009 11:26 AM

I have said it before and I will say it again: No director in Hollywood knows more about having one's arm in beaver than Jodie Foster.

Posted by: Tracer Bullet at July 10, 2009 11:26 AM

Well, BWeaves, 50 *is* the new 40, so maybe that's got something to do with it...


Happy Birthday!! I shall drink heavily in your honor this evening. (Which I totally wouldn't have otherwise. No, really. I swear.)

Posted by: Anna von Beaverplatz at July 10, 2009 11:48 AM

Yeah! ROFLMAO!! Can I has a beaver? This movie is teh bomb yo! Yeah...

...

Yeah. That's pretty much the gist of things to come...

Fucking EEs.

Posted by: Skitz at July 10, 2009 11:50 AM

Did you use yourself up, Skitz?

Posted by: Snath at July 10, 2009 12:04 PM

Happy Birthday BWeaves!

Posted by: MelBivDevoe at July 10, 2009 12:12 PM

Happy BDay BWeaves!

I hope I look that good when I hit 50. Soon. Too soon. Omigod! What have I done with my life!

Posted by: Odnon at July 10, 2009 12:14 PM

Lizzie, I would actually want to see this if Mila Kunis was cast instead.

Happy Birthday BWeaves!

Posted by: jM at July 10, 2009 12:17 PM

Jodie Foster=Beaver hunter

There fixed that, boo.


I was disappointed that this wasn't a Leave It To Beaver remake. Jerry Mathers and Tony Dow could use the work. Right, BWeaves? (Happy B-day!)

Posted by: ed newman at July 10, 2009 12:48 PM

BWeaves, when I was in my twenties I dated women that were much older than I. Trust me, it ain’t nothing like eatin’some fifty year old broad out that has gray pubes.

Happy Birthday "B"

Posted by: Guess Who! at July 10, 2009 12:52 PM

Happy fucking 50th, BWeaves! You are the awesomenest 50 year-old I know.

Skitz, don't make me take it back. DON'T MAKE ME.

And oh, Megan Fox. You are a SERIOUS ACTRESS now.

Posted by: figgy at July 10, 2009 1:47 PM

Shanthnx, ed.

Posted by: boo at July 10, 2009 3:03 PM

Way to go, BWeaves, that's a lot of solar orbits to complete. Age is just a number, so go grab AvB and see who can outdrink who!

Posted by: lordhelmet at July 10, 2009 3:18 PM

I...um...gosh, I couldn't possibly top Guess Whookie's birthday greeting, I'm afraid. But BWeaves, happy birthday and I hope you have a lovely day!

Posted by: meaux at July 10, 2009 6:42 PM

BWeaves,

You'll never be as old as I am.

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

, 5.23.57

Posted by: , (the commenter formerly known as bucdaddy) at July 10, 2009 8:15 PM

1957!! The fuck!! That’s like!, man!, whoa!!

Posted by: Guess Who! at July 10, 2009 8:38 PM

No shit.

Posted by: , (the commenter formerly known as bucdaddy) at July 11, 2009 12:19 AM

I've said it before and I'll say it again: Haven't we explored the "man/beaver-puppet" relationship enough on Full House?

Posted by: UncivilizedMike at July 11, 2009 2:42 PM

OMG wouldn't that be awesome if it was the SAME beaver puppet from Full House? Make it happen!

Posted by: UncivilizedMike at July 11, 2009 2:44 PM