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Mark Your Calendars: Valentine's Day 2013 Will Be A Good Day To Die Hard

By Rob Payne | Posted Under Trade News | Comments (22)



pajibaagooddaytodiehard.jpg

Still holding on to his youth for dear life, Bruce Willis is yet again stepping into the impossibly blood soaked shoes of John McClane, New York City super cop. Fox Films President Tom Rothman revealed yesterday (on Jim Rome’s show, no less) that A Good Day to Die Hard will begin shooting in January 2012 for a February 14, 2013 release date. Yes, that really is the title, but no word on whether the movie itself will revolve around St. Valentine’s Day. Since the first time John McClane was in the wrong place at the wrong time (from his and the bad guys’ perspective, anyhow) during a Christmas party and actually makes for a decent holiday season movie, I’m not ruling V-Day out.

Bruce Willis seems willing to do anything to recapture the Christmas miracle of the first Die Hard, except, of course, making his signature character a recognizable human being again. John McClane vs. a fucking fighter jet belongs in a Wolverine movie… So, it’s probably not a good sign that the creative genius behind the X-Men Origins: Wolverine screenplay, Skip Woods (Skip. Woods.), wrote the A Good Day to Die Hard script. Thankfully, Willis’ handpicked director, John Moore, helmed such modern classics as Max Payne, The Omen, and Behind Enemy Lines… Oh. Oh. Well, at least this movie won’t have the Short Roundy presence of Justin Long, so maybe Mary Elizabeth Winstead will get a bigger role as daughter Lucy… Wait, no, instead A Good Day to Die Hard will have the Mutt Williamsy presence of the yet-to-be-cast John McClane Jr. playing die hard with daddy.

Indeed, it looks like the fifth Die Hard could have a hand-off-the-franchise storyline that finds the McClane Boys foiling a terrorist plot that threatens to damn the entire planet to some sort of hell. Because when you die hard in a Skyscraper and then die harder in an Airport and then die hard with a vengeance in New York and then live free in America or die hard, the only next logical progression is to find a good day in the World to die hard. You know, an adventure that not just any elderly police officer and his ne’er do well son would be capable of. I guess being a super cop is hereditary. Did I mention the action takes place in Russia, with Russian terrorists? In Russia? Did I mention that? I don’t think I did, but it does. A Good Day to Die Hard has Russia all over it, because we’ve come all the way back around to Russian villains in order not to piss off any other nationality. I guess they’ve developed a psychic callous about this sort of thing.

Wait, I’ve writing all this almost as if the whole thing was an inevitability, but why do we need a new Die Hard, again?

(sources: Hitfix, /Film)

Rob Payne also writes the indie comic The Unstoppable Force and tweets on the Twitter @RobOfWar. He thinks the first Die Hard is a perfect movie. Perfect.









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Comments

But... It has to be today! FOR OUR ANCESTORS!

Posted by: Blake Shrapnel at October 13, 2011 11:07 AM

This title conjures mental pictures of John McClane swinging a Bat'leth on the Red Square dispatching KGB flunkies. I'd go see that.

Posted by: Phedre at October 13, 2011 11:24 AM

Really? "A Good Day to Die (Hard)" ? What, did someone fall asleep while watching Star Trek: TNG? Is Michael Dorn the main villain?

The only way this movie would be worth watching is if Bruce is actually stomping Ashton Kutcher's guts out for 90 minutes- which may happen anyway if he even suspects Kutcher ever looked at his daughters cock-eyed.

Bonus points if he gives Charming Potato lessons while doing so.

Posted by: bleujayone at October 13, 2011 11:36 AM

The header picture reminds me of seeing Eddie Murphy on Letterman promoting a Beverly Hills Cop movie. They showed a clip of him dangling from an amusement park ride and when the cut back to the interview, Eddie said, "You know, my shoulder still ain't right".

Posted by: Mrs. Julien at October 13, 2011 11:37 AM

Should we expect another PG-13 rating?

If so, I'm betting everything I have on them mixing in a "Yippee-ki-yay, Mother Russia!"

Posted by: branded at October 13, 2011 11:46 AM

All of this sounds awful.

But I'll be the first to defend Live Free or Die Hard. That movie was fun from top to bottom, not to mention Timothy Olyphant as the villain. And I thought Justin Long was a surprisingly good addition to the film. True, it's not really a Die Hard film other than it's main character, because it is a bit cartoonish. But honestly, I still love the hell out of that flick.

Posted by: ChristianH at October 13, 2011 11:52 AM

Good call, branded, they don't know if it will be PG-13 or R, yet. I bet the script has "Yippee-ki-yay, Mother Russia!" as a placeholder, just in case. Also, "Don't make me Putin a cap in yo' ass" for good measure.

@Mrs. Julien: I totally remember that Murphy interview. It and that scene are about all I remember from Beverly Hills Cop 3. His career ain't been right since.

I definitely should've used a Worf header picture here. Oh, regrets, I've had a few...

Posted by: RobP at October 13, 2011 11:52 AM

Better an unnecessary sequel than a remake starring someone like Taylor Lautner.

Posted by: MelBivDevoe at October 13, 2011 12:08 PM

3 GroupThink demerits to MelBivDevoe for deviation from the hive mind and referring to Taylor Llamautner by his non-Pajiba name.

Posted by: Mrs. Julien at October 13, 2011 12:49 PM

Die hard and die harder were great films. After that they just lampooned the whole thing

Posted by: Roland at October 13, 2011 1:21 PM

Ugh... I legitimately enjoyed Live Free or Die hard, despite the fact that there were a great many absurd moments. It was just a fun movie. But this sounds awful.

Posted by: camytaru at October 13, 2011 1:25 PM

Has it gotten to the point we can officially call the Die Hard franchise ironically named?

Posted by: googergieger at October 13, 2011 3:03 PM

We get demerits now?!? Crap. I need to brush up on my Pajibese.

Posted by: MelBivDevoe at October 13, 2011 3:07 PM

We get demerits now?!?

Well I voted that we hit people in the kneecaps with hatchets, but who the fuck listens to me.

Posted by: TK at October 13, 2011 4:53 PM

I was actually stoked for this until you said Justin Long wasn't coming back (Gimme a break, I liked Short Round too. In fact, as some of you may have noticed, I have a soft spot for the cutesy/goofy sidekick in general).

Posted by: Angeleno Ewok at October 13, 2011 5:03 PM

I thought we agreed on random kneecap hatcheting. Let me check the manual. BRB.

Posted by: Mrs. Julien at October 13, 2011 5:18 PM

Well I voted that we hit people in the kneecaps with hatchets, but who the fuck listens to me.

Posted by: TK at October 13, 2011 4:53 PM

The people trapped in your basement?

Posted by: Uriah Creep at October 13, 2011 8:49 PM

Screw the haters, this will be awesome.

Posted by: Benza at October 13, 2011 9:39 PM

Horrible title. I see that title and I think of David Carradine who also died hard.

Posted by: DT at October 14, 2011 8:31 AM

I hope you continue to blogging because you are good.

Posted by: Lauren Hoffee at October 19, 2011 10:30 AM

I love your blog.. very nice colors & theme. Did you create this website yourself? Plz reply back as I’m looking to create my own blog and would like to know wheere u got this from. thanks

Posted by: Police at October 20, 2011 12:16 AM

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Posted by: worms electronic apk at November 10, 2011 3:50 AM