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Making the Most of What Equipment He Has? Gosling in Talks to Wear a Mask and Ride with Depp

By Cindy Davis | Posted Under Trade News | Comments (11)



ryan-gosling-lone-ranger.jpeg

Dear Ryan Gosling,

I read a little news snippet today that left me deeply disturbed. First, let me say that I’ve been so impressed with your subtle and nuanced acting; I really think you deserved an Oscar nomination for Blue Valentine. If you want to know the truth, I’d rather you were nominated over Michelle Williams—though she did a fine job—yours was the better piece of work. Though I’m late to the Gosling party, I was so affected by your performances in both Blue Valentine and Lars and the Real Girl, I feel I have to step in when I see you’re about to make a huge mistake.

You know Johnny Depp, right? He, too, has been a fine actor over the course of his career and he also started out with some quirky roles that played up the strength of his subtleties and facial expressions. But somewhere along the line he got sucked into a Disney film and there has been no turning back. He’s practically a caricature these days, between his goofy Captain Jack Sparrow and that Ménage à trois he has going with Burton and Bonham Carter. So you can imagine my concern when I read that you are considering taking on The Lone Ranger, with Johnny as your Tonto.

Don’t think I don’t realize the allure of those big Disney bucks and the young girls fawning all over you; I am not so naive. I can practically envision the whole thing in my head. I know this could make for a great, goofy comedy and I can see you taking the Ranger somewhere he’s never been before, turning his seriousness into farce. I have no doubt audiences would be left hysterical and you, Johnny and Disney would end up megakazillionaires (well, two of the three already are). We’re talking practically the same team here: Verbinski, Bruckheimer, Depp, but please…think about your career. Depp got into the Pirates series because of his kids, you have no reason to step off the plank this early. There will be plenty of time to turn yourself from respected actor to mindless buffoon. Heck, maybe your team can set this up for the later years and you boys can make Lone Ranger: The Golden Years. Just promise me you’ll take some time to think this through. Picture yourself in a few with long hair and moronic glasses, wondering where it all went wrong. If you make this movie, I’ll tell you where: right here, this very moment, when you ignored my sage advice and impassioned plea. Don’t do it. Johnny coulda had an Oscar…

Sincerely,

Cindy









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Comments

Since Disney started his career, it's only fair that they should be the ones to end it.

Posted by: Uda at April 18, 2011 5:10 PM

*siiiiigh* Lone Ranger is basically a Zorro variation (or it might be the other way around), anyway, that road has been traveled already by Banderas. Apart from that, Depp is just not "right" for the part, too quirky. Or are they going dark for this? Hope not. I don't know, the character is kind of buffoonish, like something The Chin or Fillion are better suited for.

Posted by: BarbadoSlim at April 18, 2011 5:19 PM

Aaah! It's nice that after the ugliness of Ayn Rand, we get a palate-cleansing Baby Goose picture. On to the next course...

Posted by: PaddyDog at April 18, 2011 5:23 PM

Could not agree with you more about Blue Valentine. I love Colin Firth, but Gosling's was the performance of the year. And yes, he was better than Michelle Williams (who was excellent).

Posted by: Mel C. at April 18, 2011 5:37 PM

Uda's got a sad, but valid point. You DO know that those Mouseketeers were forced to sign (in blood, no doubt) life-long contracts where they promised to do Disney's absolute bidding at least once in their life, as payment for starting their careers?

It's true. I read about it once.

Posted by: Figgy at April 18, 2011 7:05 PM

he's a fine actor, but isn't he a bit small and dweeby to play the lone ranger. maybe its hipster lone ranger who just hangs at the saloon being too cool for the prossies.

Posted by: idleprimate at April 18, 2011 7:16 PM

Baby Goose, stay away from Bruckheimer. He is the Michael Bay of producers. Run! Run now!

Posted by: Uriah Creep at April 18, 2011 10:29 PM

Also he looks bizarrely like MrFig in that header photo.

Posted by: Figgy at April 18, 2011 11:06 PM

Baby Goose must have read your impassioned letter, Cindy, because it's off! Thanks, on behalf of everyone, for swaying him.

Posted by: Caspar at April 19, 2011 4:53 AM

Depp would be playing Tonto, Slim. Wise up!

Posted by: Gitley at April 19, 2011 8:36 AM

My days with Baby Goose began with him starring on Young Hercules. So I've seen him in worse. And my love endures...

Posted by: KatSings at April 19, 2011 9:31 AM