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Korean Jesus Heard Your Prayers: 21 Jump Street Gets A Sequel, Plus More Movie News

By Jodi Clager | Trade News | April 19, 2013 | Comments ()


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Do you remember when everyone said, "Jonah Hill is doing a 21 Jump Street movie? With Charming Potato?!?? THAT WILL SUCK." Then the movie came out and made (some of) us cackle loudly and screech with delight. That was a good time. Collider reports that Tatum and Hill will return to the sequel, as will directors Phil Lord and Chris Miller and writer Michael Bacall, for a probable 2014 release.

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Perhaps I should have learned a lesson with 21 Jump Street, but I believe that a remake of Weird Science will be worse than having a raging party at your house crashed by a bunch of motorcycle-riding buttwads with questionable hygiene while your brother sits in the kitchen, being a pile of sh*t.

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I will admit that the news of Bacall writing the script has promise, but I remain unconvinced. Universal is counting on remaking the movie in the vein of The Hangover: R-rated and raunchy. Have you watched Weird Science as an adult? Sh*t's creepy as ALL HELL. They're going to up the raunch of an adult woman teaching underage kids about using their ding-dangs? Don't get me wrong, I watched it a lot as a kid and put my bra on my dog's head just to make a Weird Science joke, bu t... if they got Angelina Jolie to play Lisa ...

Now, here's some news about a movie based on a true story of tag. You know, like "Tag, you're it"? Yes. Will Ferrell and Jack Black are in talks to star in Tag Brothers, based on a Wall Street Journal article about men in their 40s that meet every February to play an epic, far-reaching game of tag. I'm going to sit here and imagine the different ways Ferrell and Black would devise to tag each other. Perhaps hiding in a car trunk or behind a bush? Infiltrating a workplace or hijacking a boat? If Mark Steilen's screenplay is up to their standards, we might find out.

Another original(ish) property is Brad Bird's Tomorrowland, written by Damon Lindelof and Jeff Jensen. George Clooney stars in the film as an inventor who is attempting to figure out what happened to Tomorrowland, as it now exists in an alternate dimension. Clooney will be joined by a teenage girl and a pre-pubescent robot. The robot will be played by Raffey Cassidy (Snow White and the Hunstman). But wait! It gets weirder! Cassidy's robot girl knows different combat techniques and has a relationship with Clooney's inventor. Yeah. That doesn't sound creepy or like a smoke monster/cave of light type scenario at all.







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Comments Are Welcome, Bigots and Trolls Are Not


  • Long_Pig_Tailor

    Yeah, I'm okay with the Weird Science thing. They already did a crappy USA network spin-off series in the 90s, so it's not like it's all that sacred already. I mean, it's not like we're remaking the Breakfast Club or Ferris Bueller. This is strictly third tier Hughes we're talking about. I'm cool with it. Plus, R-rated? I always wanted Lisa to be way more naked, so you know what? Dream. Come. True.

    Also, not Angelina Jolie. I mean, yes, she can drip the sex the right way, but... I dunno, it wouldn't be the right fit.

  • Rocabarra

    I heard the news of the Weird Science remake early this morning, and have been raging ever since.

    YOU CANNOT EVER REPLACE SMARMY D-BAG BILL PAXTON. NOT EVER.

  • BWeaves

    What the hell is a pre-pubescent robot, and how do you have a relationship with it/he/she?

    Unless . . . it's a vibrator that talks?

  • Sara_Tonin00

    Didn't the Duplass brothers do a move that captures the essence of the Tag concept with more depth than we can hope for from a Ferrell/Black flick? some sort of decathlon thing?

  • DataAngel

    Clooney will be joined by a teenage girl and a pre-pubescent robot.

    Is it a killer robot driving instructor and is the teenage girl actually a talking pie? Is Potsie signed on to direct?

  • Pinky McLadybits

    Maybe this is the robot?

  • Jebus

    Does the killer robot driving instructor have to make a heartbreaking decision of whether the pie lives or dies?

  • DataAngel

    Does he travel back in time for some reason?

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