HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER / GAME OF THRONES / THE WALKING DEAD / NETFLIX



Klaatu Verata Nicto! Red Band Trailers Are Proof That God Loves Us And Wants Us To Be Happy

By Jodi Clager | Trade News | January 4, 2013 | Comments ()


evil-dead-trailer.jpg

Ohhhh, kids. I have got a motherf*cking treat for you today. Evil Dead red band trailer is here. It is glorious. GLORIOUS. Listen. I don't know who is supposed to be who in this remake and I don't care (the adorable chick from "Suburbia" -- DR). The original Evil Dead is a low-budget, The Chin-filled, gore-spewing classic. It looks like the remake got a bigger budget and decided to spend it on gore, gore, and then some more gore.

I approve! I cannot wait until April 12th.




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Comments Are Welcome, Douches Are Not


  • Legally Insignificant

    This trailer has given me both a fear boner and an anticiperection.

  • John W

    I thought Levy was supposed to be playing the Ash character from the original? Isn't that what was originally announced? It looks to me that she's playing the sister who get attacks by the forest in the original.

  • Uriah_Creep

    Holy shit, that was pretty fucking intense. It might work after all.

    And George is gonna be REALLY pissed when he finds out what Tessa's gotten into.

  • Fabius_Maximus

    I guess I'll have to watch the originals now.

  • Quatermain

    I was skeptical for the longest time about this, but I'm not really skeptical anymore. It looks like a riot.

  • Nope. Nope. Nope. I'l be the cranky old bastard on this one. The original worked mainly because it sucked. Take all the cheese out and you've got any other generic horror movie. I love the original because it's terrible and they made the hell out of it anyways. I love the original because of the stories I've read about how they made it. It's the partially transparent bag of White Castle sliders with soggy fries oozing grease and indigestion.

    This movie? This movie might just be kobe burger served on an artisanal sourdough roll with heirloom tomatoes, freshly grown bibb lettuce, and garlic aoli with french fries cooked in duck fat and seasoned with truffle salt. The high end budget and serious production may make this a better movie and it may be damn good. It's just not what I want when I come home from the pub after a long work week with a couple of pints in me to take the edge off.

    And thanks to that, I've quite forgotten where I was going with all this and now have a craving for burgers. Who's up for a White Castle run?

  • Actually curled my toes as Jane Levy licked the knife and cut her tongue at the end. Jeebus...

    She's already awesome in Suburgatory, this adds about a gazillion geek points to her cred, even if it's a hot mess.

  • Green Lantern

    Ugh...the knife and tounge got to me too. UGH! UGH! UGH!

    I can't wait to see this. GAH!!!

  • opiejuankenopie

    This look WAY better than that Oz movie. Sorry, Sam.

  • Also? ALL PRACTICAL EFFECTS! I wanna have this movie's gore-strewn babies.

  • Someone better edit this together with suburgatory. Either that or the show does a horror spoof itself.

  • John W

    I just came in my pants. Twice.

  • Alex Smith

    There is no way I can watch this in theaters, I will need to watch this at home in the safety of my pillow fort.

  • stryker1121

    Pillow fort and holding onto a teddy bear for dear life.

  • NateMan

    What you said. I have no shame in admitting it. The original scared the ever-loving crap out of me.

  • lowercase_ryan

    LICK THE KNIFE!!!!!!!!

  • Dumily

    I hate to be that guy, but I think that's Jane Levy, the adorable chick from "Suburgatory".

  • Barry

    The show is Suburgatory by the way.

  • Sunny James Toppo

    she looks like a bloated up kirsten stewart..imho

  • Skyler Durden is not logged in

    I wish I could log in so that I could downvote you. Hater.

  • janetfaust

    I guess her face is a little fuller than Kristen Stewart's, if that's what you mean...

  • Alex Smith

    Bloated? Ass-hat.

  • God of Bal-Sagoth

    That's what you consider to be "bloated," huh. Ooookay.

    Also, she appears to be able to actually speak without mumbling and convey emotions. So I guess I'll take that and her "bloat" and be quite happy.

  • Miss Laaw-yuhr

    Even in the swamp, she's also a cleaner version of KStew.

  • Frank Booth

    Klaatu BARADA Nicto...

  • BlackRabbit

    *cough cough*

  • NateMan

    Dude, if you spell it right the dead will be unleashed!

  • ...could've sprung for a bit more Chin

  • L.O.V.E.

    "I'll take, 'Things not said by Rumer Willis' plastic surgeon', for $500, Alex."

  • Well, you've made my night. And you owe me a mouthful of Johnnie Walker now.

  • L.O.V.E.

    Dangit.

    Fine, but don't be claiming you put three fingers of Blue Label in your mouth, unless you got a chin like ... oh, I don't know ...

  • Well, yeah, infact! - ... Nah, can't lie to you - it's only Red Label. And aside from a chihuaha I have the weakest jawline in existence. My chin's basically a point particle.

  • Fabius_Maximus

    Red Label? My condolences.

  • NateMan

    My wife STILL has not seen the original. With it being on Netflix I might have to tie her down and force her to be entertained this weekend.

    And then we'll watch the movie.

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