I Swear They're Like Ducks in a Row / Ranylt Richildis
Trade News | September 24, 2008 | Comments ()
It’s fitting that the word “consortium” is being used to describe the barrel of monkeys prepping to remake Akira Kurosawa’s cinema-altering Rashomon. I guess it takes an international effort (US, Japan and Singapore, in this case) to amass enough balls to do this dirty. “Consortium” calls to mind a rogue lab in a fjord where scientists have spent the last five years distilling elixirs from the egos of brazen remakers like Gus Van Sant, Stephen Soderbergh and Neil LaBute, and selling these juices off by the vial to the creatively bankrupt.
Not that it wasn’t a matter of time, and not that many many many existing films haven’t already re-imagined Rashomon by borrowing its shifting-viewpoint narrative. This time around, the action will be set in current-day America and the movie shot in English (aka Language for Dummies!). No word yet on cast or director. All I know is, a Rashomon without the input of Toshiro Mifune and Kazuo Miyagawa is one Rashomon too many.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to go duct-tape Mr. Ranylt to a radiator and break the news to him as gently as possible, before he hears it from some stranger.