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If You Can Name the Other Woman in the New ARTHUR Poster, You Win +15 Hipster Points

By Dustin Rowles | Posted Under Trade News | Comments (23)

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Ask yourself this? Why would the main love interest in Arthur be missing from previous iterations of the movie poster and all but absent from the trailer? Why? Because you might get the idea that it’s a decent movie. Because the main love interest is a brilliant actress and screenwriter in her own right, largely associated with mumblecore, who A.O. Scott suggested might be “the definitive screen actress of her generation.” Why is “the definitive screen actress of her generation” missing from most of the promotional materials for Arthur?

You know how to kill interest in studio comedy for most Americans? Mention mumblecore.

Don’t worry, though. I very much doubt she’ll make Arthur any better.


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Comments

You know, when I saw the trailer, I thought they were going to take the movie in a direction without a love interest, which seemed interesting (though it still looked like SHIT). Seems like they don't have anything going for them.

Posted by: Zeff at February 23, 2011 12:25 AM

I heart Greta Gerwig. She is a sexay lady.

Posted by: Drew Morton at February 23, 2011 12:31 AM

Those rotten Americans! If anyone could be stupid enough to not respond positively to seeing the word "mumblecore" in press materials, it's those knuckleheads.

Posted by: Jerry at February 23, 2011 12:33 AM

I have no idea who that is, but the omission is pretty terrible. Also terrible? The photoshop job on Garner's dress. It looks like a plastic tube.

Posted by: figgy at February 23, 2011 1:30 AM

Loveable.

Russell Brand.

Loveable.

Russell Brand.

Loveable.

Russell Brand.

Casting clusterfuck.

Posted by: zeke the pig at February 23, 2011 5:38 AM

I didn't know Helen Mirren was a billionaire.

But it doesn't surprise me. She could one day come out and announce she's going to portray the letter "G" or the element "xenon" (Xe) and and I would accept such without question. And...

Hmmm? What? Really? The village idiot? Oh! It won't matter who else stars then. They could be brilliant. It would only show how insignificant an actor Mr. Perry is. Oh hell with that, we can't alienate everyone, pick one of the good actresses and cut her out of the movie. You can't? Well, just ignore her a best you can. Maybe she'll get the hint and when someone thinks back on this shitpile they won't think of her.

Wait! Why did you pick the young one? What's that? You say you were going to pick Mirren but she decided to take one for the team and let the rookie off easy as her own career and reputation are enough to sustain herself from career damage from this? Oh Helen, I didn't think it was possible for me to love you any more... any more....anymore...

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ....*beep beep beep!!!

Whoa! What a dream! And why are my yoga pants so sticky? I why do I feel so funny? Gotta stop using Ben-Gay before bed.

Posted by: bleujayone at February 23, 2011 6:11 AM

This has nothing to do with Arthur. But, the last time I went to get my hair cut I took a picture of Greta Gerwig from when she was in Hannah and the Stairs. I wanted that cute pixish/hippyish style that she had. My hair stylist just mangled it. She kept going shorter and shorter in a attempt to fix it. I finally just told her stop cutting. I almost made her cry. In the end I wound up with a faux hawk. I haven't gotten my hair cut since.
I really liked her hair shorter, she looked weird with long hair in the trailer for Friends with Benefits.
Also, I think Jennifer Garner is photoshopped beyind recognition. I could not figure out who that was and I knew she was in this movie. Yowza.

Posted by: Nimue at February 23, 2011 7:39 AM

If Morgan Freeman can be Easy Reader, Helen Mirren can be the letter "G."

But if the two other women aren't the fiance and the girlfriend, who are they?

Posted by: The Mutt at February 23, 2011 7:46 AM

Look at Helen Mirren's head in that ad. It looks way too big for her body. That's...really a terrible image.

Posted by: Wednesday at February 23, 2011 8:43 AM

You guys mention it all the time but I have no idea what "mumblecore" is. What I do know is that it doesn't sound fun. Take the joy of MUMBLING but make it super hardcore! That gives you MUMBLECORE! Yeah, not doing anything for me. Sounds like a poorly shot and edited navel gazing art house excercise in tedium and audience endurance. I'm not saying that's what it is, I'm just saying you couldn't find a less appealing descriptor for the genre if you tried. Maybe if you called it "stuttercore" or "stutterstammermumblecore".

(I didn't make up the label, Tyler. But you should give them a shot. They're the opposite of navel gazing tedium. They're improvised comedies, only instead of jokes, they mine situations and take them through their natural progression. Like, what would happen if you and your spouse decided to allow each other one free night to bone whoever you'd like (The Freebie), what if you and your straight best friend, on a dare, attempted to do male porn together (Humpday), what if you lied and told your boss that your infant died to get out of going to work (The Lie) or what if you decided to stage a horror film and not tell anyone about it (Baghead)? Also, most of them clock in at around 80 minutes. Watch one, and you'll want to explore the entire subgenre. Plus, Katie Aselton is in a lot of them. And Greta Gerwig. And they'll make your nethers feel funny. -- DR)

Posted by: TylerDFC at February 23, 2011 8:46 AM

"mumblecore"

Sounds like something you need Vaseline for.

Posted by: BarbadoSlim at February 23, 2011 8:57 AM

Tyler - I had to look it up on Wikipedia.

Posted by: Mrs. Julien at February 23, 2011 9:15 AM

+15

Sweet. I was low on hipster points. Now all I need is a PBR power up, and I'll be prepared to face off against ... wait, there is a final boss, isn't there? Aren't I anti-something?

Posted by: Will at February 23, 2011 9:53 AM

Yeah, but why is called mumblecore? I always came away from that label with the feeling that the sound quality sucked and they didn't have subtitles for the hearing impaired.

Posted by: BWeaves at February 23, 2011 9:59 AM

I've thought from the minute this movie was announced that it was going to suck big time. Nothing has changed.

Posted by: John W at February 23, 2011 10:22 AM

See the thing with the original Arthur is that Dudley Moore was cast on-the-money for that role. He had a certain charm, physically he had a certain vulnerability that is NEEDED for a character that is riiiiiight on the verge of being obnoxious as all fuck. So now they get this, overgrown smelly assclown, and you can just TELL he's going to be grating and hammy.

Posted by: BarbadoSlim at February 23, 2011 10:33 AM

Damn, this poster does not do anything for me. Everyone looks as unattractive as possible, their facial expressions look random and unrelated to each other...

At least the Val Kilmer - 50 Cent poster looked funny. This one is just... MEH!!

Posted by: Big Softie at February 23, 2011 12:18 PM

Hmm. +15 hipster points for guessing correctly?

How about -900 hipster points for actually watching this flaming sack of dog poo?

Posted by: The Wanderer at February 23, 2011 12:43 PM

Oh, it's that mumblecore chick. I would like to collect my points in cookie form.

Posted by: denesteak at February 23, 2011 1:12 PM

I would never have identified that woman as Jennifer Garner - is that really what she looks like these days?

Posted by: llp at February 23, 2011 2:18 PM

I love Greta Gerwig! I would've known it was her if they hadn't had her pose with her head down. Of course, already the best thing about this steaming pile has been de-emphasized.

Posted by: JapJay at February 23, 2011 2:41 PM

Doesn't Greta Gerwig lose about a million hipster points for appearing in both this steaming pile and "Friends with Benefits"?

Posted by: Wilbur Huckle at February 23, 2011 5:17 PM

Yeah, I'm with those who didn't even recognize the two women I DID know were in this movie. The top image is distorted.

On a different note: there are regular commentators on this site who did not know what mumblecore is? I'm not trying to be snide, I'm just amazed that this term hasn't come up enough that people haven't heard it before.

Posted by: Sara Tonin at February 23, 2011 5:51 PM