If At First You Don't Succeed, Try Again, Fail, And Then Reboot.
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If At First You Don't Succeed, Try Again, Fail, And Then Reboot.

By Jodi Clager | Trade News | December 10, 2012 | Comments ()

chris evans ff2-thumb-550x412-56801.jpg

20th Century Fox seems to think it can compete with Marvel's movie prowess right now. In order to do that, Fox has decided that their Marvel properties should be interconnected, even though they haven't been able to do that as one studio and Marvel Studios did it with their universe when owned by Paramount and now Disney. This means rebooting something they've already fucked up. Which superhero franchise is getting das reboot? Fantastic Four!

Josh Trank (Chronicle) has been tapped to direct and has already been given a target release date of March 6, 2015. Here is where things get a bit more interesting. The Wolverine will be the start of Fox's new Marvel Universe when it is released in 2013, X-Men Days of Future Past will continue that, uh, continuity in 2014, and then Fantastic Four in 2015. I'm going to go ahead and guess that this means Wolverine: Why Did You Do That To My Deadpool is going to be disregarded in the new universe. Please, for the love of Bea Arthur, be disregarded.
I'm not wholly convinced that Fox can pull all of this off, but the addition of Mark Millar ("Kick-Ass", "Ultimate Fantastic Four") as head of the Marvel Universe at 20th Century Fox is promising.

Now to the important part: who should be cast as Reed Richards, Sue Storm, Johnny Storm, and Ben Grimm? Can we get Jensen Ackles on the movie screen as Johnny Storm? Maybe we could get some Joel Edgerton action up in here. Please, please keep all of the Hollywood Jessicas away from Sue Storm.

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Comments Are Welcome, Bigots and Trolls Are Not

  • Buck Forty

    Reed Richards - George Clooney
    Sue Storm - Angelina Jolie
    Johnny Storm - Brad Pitt
    Ben Grimm - Matt Damon (w/ CGI)
    The FF have to stop some master villian who is cleaning out all the casinos in Vegas... played by Al Pacino, reprising his Scarface accent...

  • Fabius_Maximus

    Isn't Ackles a bit short to be a superhero?

    Also, I think Chiklis was great as Thing, even if they didn't do much with him, so they could bring him back.

  • TallulahBelle

    Ackles is over six foot, he looks short next to Padalecki because Jared is over six four. And now I'll go back to lurking and try to ignore the fact that defending a CW actor (even a great one, shutup he is, he'd make an awesome Johnny Storm) is what brought me out . . .

  • Fabius_Maximus

    You're fine. I, too, enjoy Supernatural (although enjoy might be a bit strong word for the last two seasons).

  • DarthBrookes

    Dwayne Johnson as Ben Grimm...

    Get it? Huh? Huhhhhh?

  • Aaron Schulz

    Not only do i enjoy the joke but i think he could do it, did you happen to see him as the hulk on halloween?

  • Idle Primate

    My only hope is that hey forgo a half movie long origin. Make mention halfway thru the film in a couple lines and brief flashback. In comics, whenever origins were told it usually over a couple of panels or pages. Other than wolverine where it is whole hoary contrived and weary raison d'etre

  • Re: keeping Jessicas away - If it was done really well, I wouldn't object to Jessica Chastain being Sue Storm. I do think she's probably too good for whatever they come up with, though...

  • Puddin

    What about Jessica Lange clad only in Jessica McClintock?

  • Andrew J Moore

    You saying that adding Mark Millar is, well, it tells you what you don't know about that hack. Misogyny. Racism. Nastiness. The amazing thing about Kick Ass the movie is that you didn't see what was in the comic.

  • GDI

    How about the disaster that was Civil War?

    Him being a hack had little to do with the alleged trifecta of social sins (though he did approach the racial, homophobic, and misogynist angle rather tastelessly, emphasis on homophobic) and more to do with him trying to be edgy at the expense of a good story. A great story can be forged when tackling those issues, but Miller goes for straight shock factor over anything else.

    The FF will not work as a proper movie with Hollywood's current mission statement. I'll be pleasantly if I have to eat my words, but that's 1000-1 odds of that happening.

  • Bert_McGurt

    Just let the cast of It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia do it. In character. Frank can be Doc Doom.

  • Miley's Virus

    I vote Scarjo for Sue Storm. That way her boobs would exist in both Marvel Universes simultaneously, solving all contradictions between relativity and quantum mechanics, and creating the possibility of infinite Scarjo boobs.

  • InternetMagpie

    I don't know what this shit is but I would watch the HELL out of it if it featured Jensen Ackles in something Lycra.

  • Daniel Valentin

    I think the main problem with the Fantastic Four franchise is that they are STILL trying to focus on the "who" of the Fantastic Four without focusing on the "what", as in "what makes the Fantastic Four important to the Marvel U." Answer: they're SCIENCE heroes. Their purpose is the exploration of their universe and stretching the limits of science. We've NEVER seen any of this in the films. With the exception of the original accident that gave them their powers and that machine to return Ben Grimm to normal, science is COMPLETELY ABSENT from the franchise.

    An honest to goodness Fantastic Four movie would have them visit other planets and dimensions and confront the denizens there. Annihilus, the Inhumans, the Skrulls, the Heralds of Galactus, the Negative Zone, the Microverse, that's the kind of crazy stuff we wanna see in a Fantastic Four flick. Yes, you can have the bickering and the bonding, but do it in the middle of a fistfight between The Thing and a big-ass monster from the 5th dimension. The plot should seem as if written by a five year-old, or something out of Axe Cop.

    As for X-Men, FOR GOD'S FUCKING SAKE, LET IT REST. The X-Men franchise in movies is right now exactly as the X-Men franchise in comics: tired, overdone and over-exposed. The only franchise of the X-Men canon that is really worth doing a good movie over(and it's not even that much of an X-Men link anymore) is Deadpool. And we need it to be the blackest fucking comedy possible. We're talking drop-kick babies into bonfires, paint Van Gogh with human brains, slap a henchman on the face with your dick black. And since no movie producer has had the brains to cast him into any other superhero movie, to my eternal befuddlement), I nominate Nathan Fillion for the role. Just cover his face in raw hamburger and let him ad-lib half the lines in the script and it'll be comedy gold.

  • Idle Primate

    If only Del Toro could be tapped for a FF movie.

  • BWeaves

    My accountant was named Johnny Storm. She died. I never could get over giggling about her name, though.

  • logan

    Your accountant was a stripper? that's awesome! Did she advise you to invest in poles?

  • Groundloop

    More like unvest on poles!!

    High five!!



  • logan

    This is just going to suck no matter what they do because the FF is an old fashioned comic book. The strength of the FF is that they are family and no one who is not a comic geek gets that.

  • Idle Primate

    The incredibles made out ok

  • The crap-tacular writing and direction were the worst sins of the first two. Aside from Alba, who was really awful, the casting could have worked. However, starting over (we can't have Capsicle also be the Human Torch):

    Reed Richards - Clive Owen (let's resurrect this guy)

    Sue Storm - Rosario Dawson (yes, let's inter-racial this here thing)

    Johnny Storm - I don't know yet, but some someone from Red Tails cast, like Nate Parker, or change it up with older brother version, with someone like Common

    Ben Grimm - I like the Edgerton suggestion, but what about Ken Watanabe?

  • BlackRabbit

    I like it. I would never never never get done, but it seems fun.

  • duckandcover

    I hope to God they re-cast Chris Evans as Johnny Storm. I would love the day that Captain America and the Human Torch met.

  • FrayedMachine

    Oh my god. Ackles as Storm would be -so good-. Yes, please and thank you.

    Though to be honest, I don't know why they keep going with Fantastic Four. Was never a particularly huge fan of that lot.

  • I am not a big Fantastic Four fan, but if Jensen Ackles was on board I would be there in a heartbeat.

  • FrayedMachine

    You and me both. Yu-uhhhmm

  • Rotwang

    The Thing: Wallace Shawn.

  • John G.

    My Dinner With Mister Fantastic

  • bleujayone


  • kirivinokur

    Sue Storm = Connie Britton
    Reed Richards = Mitt Romney

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