Human Centipede Clip

Click It. You Know You Want To.

By TK | Posted Under Trade News | Comments (70)

I must say this about Human Centipede: First Sequence — while I’m certainly no fan of torture porn or the modern trend towards the increasingly revolting, director Tom Six has really ratcheted things up a notch. I mean, seriously — where is there to go from here?

Don’t answer that.

Anyway, we have news from the Human Centipede film makers, courtesy of Slashfilm. First of all, as you may have guessed from the title of the film, this is not the last we’ll see of… whatever this is. A sequel has indeed been planned. Oh, goodie. It screened at Fantastic Fest in Austin, which we were unfortunately not present for. However, it garnered some positive, if disturbed, buzz, and we were able to get a bit more plot information:

Tom Six’s The Human Centipede (First Sequence) is an insane biological horror film that enthusiastically explores territory that few filmmakers dare to tread. In The Human Centipede, Dr. Heiter (Dieter Laser) is a leering, sepulchral surgeon from Germany whose specialty is separating Siamese twins. Dr. Heiter decides to evolve his craft by sewing together living beings together at the “mucous-cutaneous zone” (guess) in order to create Siamese triplets with a single digestive system. After his experiment in creating a three-segment rottweiler (“a beautiful three-hound construction”) fails, Dr. Heiter tries again, shifting his attention to humans. First, a trucker is stolen away while relieving himself on the side of the road, Next, two clueless party girls who come knocking on Dr. Heiter’s door after getting lost in the German forest get pulled into the experiment. After erasing the trucker from the picture, the doctor finds another victim: a crazed Japanese man wandering around Germany.

When I was a kid, I had a friend whose goal was to invent a six legged Dachshund. This kind of takes it to the next level, eh?

Anyway, we also now have the first clip from the movie. Don’t bother complaining, because you know you’re going to click on it. You can’t help yourself. It’s OK. It’s actually not too bad. You won’t regret it, I promise.

Trust me.

(nsfw)

Happy Monday!

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Comments

I hope Will Smith stars in the remake.

Posted by: TSF at September 28, 2009 11:07 AM

may i ask how someone actually breathes in a situation like that? it just doesn't seem like a sustainable thing..... ewwww poopy face

Posted by: betty at September 28, 2009 11:08 AM

I'M NOT GOING TO PLAY THAT CLIP.
WHY AM I EVEN READING THIS?

I WON'T, WON'T, WON'T!

Posted by: DontStopNow at September 28, 2009 11:10 AM

pfffffffHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Posted by: xte at September 28, 2009 11:14 AM

Way too early in the morning, TK. Not cool.

Posted by: Sapphiar at September 28, 2009 11:16 AM

You want to know the most horrifying thing in that video? The crazy ass doctor wears CROCS!

ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!

Posted by: BWeaves at September 28, 2009 11:17 AM

Yikes! Please excuse me while I go regurgitate my breakfast. Thanks Pajiba, this is the way you start off my Monday morning.

Posted by: androstarr at September 28, 2009 11:27 AM

You know, I can't wait for the inevitable porno version to come out, where it's all mouth to penis.

Posted by: BWeaves at September 28, 2009 11:28 AM

And on a Monday, no less. How DO they breathe? The mouth isn't available, and the nose is right in the butt crack. And again, WHY do this at all? I see no positives here. And if you can't even do it right with dogs, what makes you think humans will be any easier?

All right, the guy's nuts, clearly logic doesn't apply here.

Posted by: DeadBessie at September 28, 2009 11:30 AM

Well, at least they got rid of the trucker.

Not many things are worse than a trucker butt.

Posted by: agent bedhead at September 28, 2009 11:34 AM

So they're eating each other's shit, right? That's what's going on here? Wouldn't they choke on their own vomit and die? Can you survive on eating shit alone? I can't possibly be the only one asking these questions. And seriously, is it really this easy to make a movie these days?

Posted by: annoyingmouse at September 28, 2009 11:36 AM

I guess he had to be German. His name is Heiter. It means Cheerful for those who DON'T know how to pronounce Goethe. There are no German woods left. Not really.
God, how I hate that shit!!! Why do you think we would even need any of your stupid tourists, WORLD. Look, we're Germans. There are some of us who would do that on a consensual basis.

Posted by: The Gemeinderat at September 28, 2009 11:37 AM

I regretted it.

Posted by: logar at September 28, 2009 11:39 AM

Is this movie the new Pajiba meme? I mean, I know Gotopus blesses all eight legged creatures but this is fucking ridiculous.

Posted by: admin at September 28, 2009 11:40 AM

Did that movie description just quote itself?

Posted by: avocadolime at September 28, 2009 11:40 AM

Keep mouth-to-anusing that chicken, TK.

Posted by: branded at September 28, 2009 11:45 AM

Word on the street is that Altoids is joining on as a major advertiser...

Posted by: Skitz at September 28, 2009 11:46 AM

Doesn't it seem a little stereotypical that the evil, insane doctor in question is German? Since when did Germany corner the market on evil scientists and doctors? Don't get me wrong, some of the best evil doctors out there come from the land of bratwurst and lederhosen, but surely there are other evil doctors from other lands ready to unleash medical mayhem upon the asses...er masses.

Is is too much to ask that we see an evil doctor hail from Sweden or Zimbabwe? Is there really an Evil Medical School and is it based in Belgium? And did this doctor flunk out of for mistaking the difference between actual evil and just being mindlessly gross?

Yes, I am stalling in an attempt not to look at the clip.

Posted by: bleujayone at September 28, 2009 11:50 AM

I think "meme" is the new wildly over-used hipster word of the day. Please lets just stop. The world will be better for it.

Posted by: androstarr at September 28, 2009 11:51 AM

I'm pretty sure Hormel has all the tie ins locked up.

Posted by: Mrcreosote at September 28, 2009 11:51 AM

Wait, wait the Wendy's Human Centipede Chili meal! Easily feeds three. No refunds.

Posted by: Mrcreosotec at September 28, 2009 11:53 AM

And now we know how Joker got his cut smile. Well, I'm glad I asked.

headwoodchipper

Posted by: jM at September 28, 2009 12:03 PM

Is she !!! i saw her photos on a tall celeb site,seems named :" ___Tall connect CO M___ ",you know?

Posted by: gary at September 28, 2009 12:08 PM

That's fucked up, spambot.

Posted by: Skewicide Blonde at September 28, 2009 12:11 PM

There is simply no reason to watch the movie now. That's all there needs to be said about this subject.

After I vmoit.

Posted by: hater from siloam springs at September 28, 2009 12:17 PM

Chew! Chew! Chugga-chugga chugga-chugga chugga-chugga Chew! Chew!

Posted by: admin at September 28, 2009 12:25 PM

Bweaves: That porno would be awesome for about 10 minutes. But if you need longer than that you're doing it wrong anyway. Like as '69' daisy chain.

Posted by: Lindsey with an 'e' at September 28, 2009 12:47 PM

Lol @ spambot... gives a whole new meaning to "___Tall connect CO M___ "

Posted by: Royalewithcheese at September 28, 2009 1:09 PM

possibly the best spambot break EVAH!!!

TK, I have loved you long time, but I'm beginning to re-think my obsession after this.

Ok, honestly...how many of you have thought of this for a Halloween costume?

Posted by: dammitjanet at September 28, 2009 1:54 PM

Ok, honestly...how many of you have thought of this for a Halloween costume?

I wasn't until NOW. Now if you'll excuse me, I have a couple of calls to make.

Posted by: Skewicide Blonde at September 28, 2009 1:56 PM

On to Cute Overload to scrub out my brain! Oh look, a hamster...

Posted by: Stella at September 28, 2009 2:03 PM

Guh. Ugh. Why oh why did I click on that?

Posted by: Captain Tuttle at September 28, 2009 2:08 PM

TK, you are a liar and a whore. Also a douche.

Posted by: Anna von Beaverplatz at September 28, 2009 2:18 PM

I don't get it.

Posted by: Dee at September 28, 2009 2:33 PM

When will you people learn that TK is six feet of concentrated evil? You think, "Oh, look. He has those adorable freckles on his nose. Nobody with adorable freckles on his nose could be evil." Bullshit. Who told Hitler, "Why don't you stop talking so much shit and do something about it"? TK. Who told Rumsfeld "Pfft. Two weeks at the most."? TK. Who surprised Christopher Reeve's horse? TK. Who greenlights "According to Jim" every season? TK. That thing that goes bump in the night? It's TK coming to murder your children and ear-fuck the corpses. When will recognize the monster in your midst? You fools! He's coming to destroy us! HE'S COMING TO DESTROY US ALL!

Posted by: Tracer Bullet at September 28, 2009 2:33 PM

So the last person on this centipede is a cute college girl?
Not that I would want to have sex with it. I'm just sayin'. She's probably pretty bored laying around all day. Everybody needs companionship, right?
Nah, forget it. The Japanese guy in front would want to watch and that would make it weird.

Posted by: Kballs at September 28, 2009 2:39 PM

Wouldn't they contract e. coli or something? There's a reason people in the food industry are required by law to wash their hands after going to the bathroom, you know.

Also, in all of the pictures, the whole bathing suit area appears to be covered in gauze, right? I understand it's for the actor's modesty, but they're doing a poor job of making it look like they're actually fused together.

I was going to bitch some more, but then I remembered; this is ridiculous.

Posted by: Christina at September 28, 2009 2:53 PM

I think TK is so pissed about drawing the short straw in having to review this horrible monstrosity of a film that he has sworn to take us all down with him by posting as much as he can about it before the actual viewing. I swear, I could hear him cackling evilly off in the distance while I read this. Because he knows that none of us will ever want to watch this. Except Pissboy, because that boy ain't right.

Posted by: Whorish Mouth at September 28, 2009 3:02 PM

OK, I admit it. I am sickly fascinated by this. I know there are so many levels on which to "question" the science of the centipede, but here's what keeps occurring to me:

Somewhere in the original description of this movie (the first post about it, I think), it mentioned that the doctor had been waiting and obsessing over finding "matching" subjects, as in transplant donors, so that if he made them one organism their bodies wouldn't "reject" each other. But what are the chances that two random girls travelling together, who are not sisters, would be a tissue match? And the first guy is Japanese. Now, I know nothing of science or medicine, but isn't it true that tissue matches are far more likely between people of the same ethnicity? Making the Japanese guy highly unlikely to match with these white girls?

Posted by: MM at September 28, 2009 3:16 PM

I refuse to watch this, the human centipede is easily the most disgusting thing ever put on film that's not a gross out comedy, a Larry the Cable Guy movie, or Tim Allen Christmas film.

Posted by: George at September 28, 2009 3:18 PM

The sequel should star Ron Jeremy and be called "Human Centipede 2: Human Fuzzy Caterpillar."

Posted by: laredo at September 28, 2009 3:19 PM

All that crying and fussing would seriously irritate the receiving rectum.

Posted by: coryo at September 28, 2009 3:21 PM

MM: I would think that mixing genders would make the whole centipede thing an unlikely match.

KBalls: You made me spit tea all over my keyboard with the Japanese guy would want to watch and THAT would make it weird. Thanks.

Posted by: BWeaves at September 28, 2009 3:33 PM

i (don't) want to go to that place. (tina fey-ism)

Posted by: glittergirl at September 28, 2009 3:45 PM

BWeaves,

I have a friend (girl) who had a lung transplant from a boy. I didn't think genders made it substantially more unlikely...

Posted by: MM at September 28, 2009 3:47 PM

This is even more sick than coming up with movies with 80s toys. Definitely more inventive. Quite refreshing in fact. One might say it's a breath of fresh air if it weren't about people sewn mouth to anus...

Posted by: astounded at September 28, 2009 3:51 PM

The sequel should star Ron Jeremy and be called "Human Centipede 2: Human Fuzzy Caterpillar."

I would think that would be called Human Centipede 2: The Shish Kabobing.

Posted by: admin at September 28, 2009 3:58 PM

Meh, I thought that looked pretty boring. There was nothing really intense or even creepy about it.

Crazy doctor? Yawn
Hot chicks in a horror film? Yawn I mean seriously, people notice when attractive people disappear.
The plot? Yawn The writer just seems to have a scat fetish.
Scary? No...the film is just going to be disgusting. I like the "torture porn" films, this just seems boring. Boring, boring, boring.

Posted by: DeistBrawler at September 28, 2009 4:05 PM

Am I the only one who expected the doctor to break out into "it's a brand new day (organism)" Dr. Horrible indeed.

PS. I totally regretted it.

Posted by: E-Money at September 28, 2009 4:31 PM

Okay, I've thought about this too much apparently, but hopefully the dude at least connected the person in front's um...lower intestine...directly to the person behind's esophagus, bypassing the mouth and therefore not requiring these poor bastards to taste the shit they are nevertheless eating. 'Cause that would be evil....oh wait...

Posted by: s. pisaster at September 28, 2009 4:39 PM

Could be worse.

Could be 'Centi-penis' by Takashi Miike

Posted by: elzupasmonkey at September 28, 2009 4:59 PM

I worked awhile to think of a snarky response to this posting but after awhile I just decided to ask the obvious question:

Why in the world are you giving this unbelievably sick project any attention whatsoever?

What in the world is there about it that merits anything other than a turned back, a "delete" key hit or an "end" tap on the phone keyboard? If it's actually shown somewhere and you review it, you'll either give it the pasting that will take so much more creativity than it deserves or someone at Pajiba will get all anti-conventional-wisdom and explain to us why this sewage is actually some kind of thoughtful meditation or commentary on modern society that has a meaning for those "brave" or whatever enough to sit through it.

Just ditch it. Methuselah's life would be too short to spend time on this crap.

Posted by: Brett at September 28, 2009 5:22 PM

This stupid movie has scarred me for life just from the pictures alone!

Case in point:
The opening of last week's episode of So You Think You Can Dance featured a brief shot of some dancers doing a breakdance chain... and when I saw it I immediately thought "HUMAN CENTIPEDE!"

I didn't think it was possible to ruin anything that has the luminous Cat Deeley involved, but there you go! Thanks for ruining my life, Tom Six!

Posted by: MelBivDevoe at September 28, 2009 6:10 PM

Screw you guys. I never wanted to ever have to think about this movie ever again. I'm not watching this I am not scrolling up to even peek at what you wrote, I came straight to comments so I could tell you SCREW YOU GUYS!!!!

Seriously.

You jerks.

Posted by: Eva at September 28, 2009 6:50 PM

Brett. This sh*t is funny. I will watch it with popcorn and, by all reports, I will laugh my arse off. I have told my brother, and he is keen also. Get on board.

Posted by: Peter G at September 28, 2009 8:08 PM

Until this reading about this shit, I thought Hostel would be the nastiest piece of cinematic drivel I'd lay my eyes on. Why do people watch this filth? And how could anyone with any sense at all have any desire to affiliate themselves with it? I hope this shit kills the torture porn genre once and for all. Kills it dead. Good riddance.

Posted by: mcmilld1 at September 28, 2009 8:40 PM

Oh great, I was all set to go watch porn, and now I can't get this damn clip out of my head. Thanks so much, d-bag!

Why did I click on that? I hate myself.

Posted by: Sarah at September 28, 2009 8:50 PM

Could be worse.

Could be 'Centi-penis' by Takashi Miike

Why isn't this an actual movie? I got my hopes up.

Posted by: wuggle at September 28, 2009 9:00 PM

Peter -- A laughter-induced lobotomy? I'd never heard of such a thing until now.

Posted by: Brett at September 28, 2009 9:01 PM

I also regret...

Posted by: mae at September 28, 2009 9:59 PM

You're lucky if you watched in this morning. Definitely not something to be seen before bed. On a related note: FUCK!

Posted by: kiwifrench at September 29, 2009 4:26 AM

You know, I can't wait for the inevitable porno version to come out, where it's all mouth to penis.

FAO BWeaves - HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Lolz. :)

Posted by: Ilamrien at September 29, 2009 10:52 AM

Ah, so I've awakened to find you've stitched my mouth to someone's bunghole? I don't care how much it hurts, I'm getting those goddamned stitches OUT. NOW.

So. There goes that plot device, huh?

Posted by: Snuggiepants the Deathbringer at September 29, 2009 11:58 PM

Yes, it was screened at Fantastic Fest in Austin. And yes, it won not one, but TWO awards: Best Picture (Horror) and Best Actor (Horror) for Dieter Laser.

I'm not sure how to feel about this.

Posted by: Bre at September 30, 2009 12:27 PM

I watched this film and loved it. It's not what you'd expect. It's pretty hilariousness (in a sick way). I love how they only used really sick sounds instead of exposing the wounds.

Posted by: Sondra_L at October 4, 2009 2:11 PM

I watched this film and loved it. It's not what you'd expect. It's pretty hilariousness (in a sick way). I love how they only used really sick sounds instead of exposing the wounds.

Posted by: Sondra_L at October 4, 2009 2:12 PM

Ok, call me sick but I really wanna see that movie :P

Posted by: Stacie at November 13, 2009 1:15 PM

I mean really? Is there people out there willing to sponsor shit like this. Isn't there anything better to spend their money on. How about a couple of castles like Nicholas Cage or even better yet, if you can't think of anything better to do with it help bail the guy out. Shit like this doesn't really need to be made!!!!!!!!

Posted by: JP at April 29, 2010 10:49 AM

Poor things.These actors can only go "up,"
in their careers.They should promote the
flick on David Letterman, with 3 side by side
monitors.

1st guy in chain thinks: "This is a drag."

Posted by: Boingo at April 30, 2010 5:30 AM

you said shit twice while complaining about shit. Talk about Freudian shits -- I mean slips!

Posted by: om at May 11, 2010 6:13 PM

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