How Low Can You Go?
By Cindy Davis | Posted Under Trade News | Comments (21)
You know how sometimes you watch a trailer like say, the one for SyFy’s Sharktopus, and it’s so damned full of cheesy goodness that you know it was intended? This is not like that. This is James Cameron, a man who seems to be so full of himself that he thought putting his name (as Executive Producer) on this thing was a good idea. Of course he’s also pressing on with the Dream of the Blue People parts 2 and 3 so I’m thinking early onset Alzheimer’s.
Whereas I cheered for Sharktopus, so shall I jeer at this horrendous abomination and apparent ripoff of The Descent as so eloquently described by Mr. Scott. Based on a true story, Sanctum follows a group of cave divers who are trapped in Earth’s “least accessible cave system” and must try to find a way out OR DIE.
From the overdone narrative to the crappy dialogue and acting, the only thing that could make it worse would be if it was in 3-D. Oh wait…
Directed by relative newcomer Alister Grierson, Sanctum stars people I’ve never heard of and this film will hopefully end up in a theater very far from all of us February 4, 2011.
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Comments
Posted by: admin at October 28, 2010 6:41 PM
Oh sweet zombie Christ's premature syphillitic ejaculate, what the fuck are you doing Cameron? First you remade Pocahontas and now you're remaking The Descent or is it more like The Cave? And in 3D, no less. This is exactly where you don't want to use 3D, numb nuts. Nothing says claustrophobia like a helmet popping out of the screen.
You know what? You're citizenship is hereby revoked. You may never associate yourself with my country again. As a matter of fact, you breathed our air and we want it back. This thing stinks worse than grated dick cheese.