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April 5, 2007 |

By Daniel Carlson | Industry | April 5, 2007 |

Remember when He’s Just Not That Into You came out three years ago? You probably do. If you’re a woman, you’ve undoubtedly heard of it; if you’re a woman and know which “Sex and the City” character best fits you, you probably have several copies. The book was co-authored by “Sex and the City” writers Greg Behrendt (the frighteningly spiky-haired fella pictured above) and Liz Tucillo, because apparently not enough reductive and mildly insulting gender-based pop-lit had been written to reinforce the kinds of stereotypes that really only exist in, well, “Sex and the City” episodes. Behrendt used to be a mildly entertaining stand-up comedian before trading on his pseudo-intellectual fame to host a talk show featuring some deeply flawed guests, but that’s not really the point. No, the point is that Hollywood, proudly three years behind the curve, will be shoehorning the self-help novel into a flimsy romantic comedy to be directed by Ken Kwapis. And lest you think that Kwapis might actually know what he’s doing because he helmed a few episodes of “Freaks and Geeks,” you should also keep in mind that this is the auteur who crafted Dunston Checks In, The Beautician and the Beast, and The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants That Probably Shouldn’t Fit Such a Wide Variety of Body Types, But Whatever. Kwapis’ film will follow a woman who falls in love with a hard-line advice guy after seeking him out to get help with her love life. The final nail in the coffin? Drew Barrymore’s Flower Films is producing. So, good luck with that.

Speaking of horror stories: Neil Jordan (The Crying Game) has been tapped to adapt and direct Heart-Shaped Box, based on the novel by Joe Hill. Hill’s not without pedigree in the horror department; he’s the son of Stephen King, which let’s face it, must have been one crazy way to grow up. According to the logline, the story deals with a rock star obsessed with the occult who buys a suit supposedly haunted by the ghost of its former owner and is then forced to “confront the ghost and the demons of his own past.” Hopefully, that won’t be nearly as Behrendty as it sounds; clothing possessed by ghosts should lead to something scarier than a heart-to-heart with a spirit.

OK, enough with the horror. I know why you all came here, so let’s get back to the gooey lovefest with the trailer for In the Land of Women, which features Adam Brody going all Zach Braff as he learns about life, love, and growing up. Maybe the only place to be a man is … in the land of women. Sounds awesome, doesn’t it? Doesn’t it? I’m gonna go kill myself:

Daniel Carlson is the managing editor of Pajiba and a low-level employee at a Hollywood industry magazine. You can visit his blog, Slowly Going Bald.

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