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December 18, 2008 |

By TK Burton | Industry | December 18, 2008 |

I keep thinking that the remake train has gotta go flying off the tracks sooner or later. Maybe it’s a fever dream, born out of too much scotch and Percocet. But a boy can dream, right?

Well, trust Rob Zombie to crush that dream. Again. Look, I’m not as obsessed over Halloween II as I am with the first one — the sequel wasn’t directed by John Carpenter (though it was written by him). But it’s still a decent entry into the slasher genre, and the last good one in the Halloween franchise. The first Halloween is an undeniable classic, and of course we all remember when Rob Zombie took a shit all over that one; Phillip said at the time that “(Zombie) thoroughly debunks the mythology of the original Carpenter film, replacing an enigmatic horror icon with a hulking thug whose motives seem explained and yet uninteresting, replacing thrills with lurid violence. Zombie’s Myers isn’t the Bogeyman; he’s just boring.”

Well, what better idea than to make a sequel. So here’s my question: Is this a sequel to a remake of a classic? Or maybe this is the remake of a sequel to a classic? Or… is this a remake of a sequel to a remake of a classic? OR…

… I just threw up.

In any event, fuck off Rob Zombie. Go back to making crappy techno-Misfits ripoff music, you jerk.

I Remember Halloween (Let's Crap On That Memory... Again) / TK

Industry | December 18, 2008 |

TK Burton is the Editorial Director. You may email him here or follow him on Twitter.

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