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Hey! It's the Fast One. I Can Tell. Cause of the Lightning Bolt!

By Dustin Rowles | Posted Under Trade News | Comments (13)



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The LA Times’ Steven Zeitchik may have pulled this out of his ass, so take it with a grain of fecal matter. So, apparently there are several names being bandied about to direct the sequel to Paranormal Activity (after the dude who directed one of the Saw movies was yanked back into the Saw franchise by those bitchy execs at Lionsgate who are suddenly skeered of the Paranormal juggernaut). Two of those names are young whippersnappers that wouldn’t warrant writing this post: Brad Anderson (Transsiberian) and Greg McLean (Wolf Creek).

The other name: Brian DePalma, the director of Scarface, Mission Impossible, Dressed to Kill and The Untouchables.

Either this is complete bullshit, or DePalma has fallen way the fuck from grace. It’s especially hard to swallow considering that the studio wants this film in theaters in time for Halloween, so it can go up against Saw VXL. That’s seven months away. And there’s still no director. And it’s not like DePalma is a quick worker or anything. At his age (he’s 70), by the time he’s finished his morning constitutional and rid himself of his bathrobe, it’s time for the early bird special and a nap. And given just how awful The Black Dahlia was (and holyshitohmygoditwasawful), I’m not sure that DePalma even deserves to helm a horror-film sequel that has all the promise of Blair Witch 2. So, don’t hold your breath, y’all.

(Source: The LA Times)

In other news of the directing nature, rumor has it that Warner Brothers is pushing ahead with a movie based on their comic-book property, The Flash, and that there are several directors being considered, foremost among them Greg Berlanti, who is basically only known so far for penning the script to The Green Lantern. Personally, I thought it was strange that another director was being floated for The Flash, when just two days ago TK was talking about Breck Eisner directing it, but then I realized that was Flash Gordon. And even after a good belittling from TK, I can’t tell them apart. One’s fast. One’s really fast? Seriously, I’m supposed to know something about a dude from the planet Mongo where he does battle with a dude named Ming the Merciless? That sounds like a Chris Kattan movie to me.

Oh wait, I know how to tell them apart: The Flash was in “Superfriends,” and Flash Gordon had a lot of Queen songs. Right?

Yeah. Don’t tell me I don’t know enough about comic books to run a movie blog. Pffft.

Wouldn’t it be cool, though, if the Flash ran really fast to the music of Queen?

Crossover!

(Can y’all feel the vein in TK’s forehead bulging? I think I’ll shut up now while my ass still doesn’t have a bar stool crammed up it.)

(Source: IESB)









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Comments

hey, i liked wolf creek. i think.
is that the aussie one with the HOT guy roadtripping with the 2 VERY UNDESERVING girls? cause, i'm not gonna lie, he was a tool. but i play well with tools.

Posted by: gp at February 26, 2010 10:33 AM

the studio wants this film in theaters in time for Halloween, so it can go up against Saw VXL.

Saw 947? Oh, Godtopus, won't SOMEONE please stop the Saw franchise? Think of the children!!!

Posted by: dammitjanet at February 26, 2010 10:48 AM

I've never hated anyone as much as I hate you.

Posted by: TK at February 26, 2010 10:49 AM

I'll hold him down, TK. You get the bat.

Posted by: Tracer Bullet at February 26, 2010 11:07 AM

"Yeah! Readership sucks! Death to nerds! Death to my Pajiba!"

- Dustin Rowles

Posted by: coryo at February 26, 2010 11:09 AM

Why bother with the bat? You were already given permission to use a bar stool...at least that's how I choose to interpret it.

Posted by: Terra Nova at February 26, 2010 11:14 AM

Say, there; speaking of Paranormal Activity. If any of you are holding on to Blu-ray copies from Netflix, d'ya think you could maybe send them the fuck back? I'd like to see it before my rugrat is born in goddamn June. Maybe you could send Moon back, too, while you're at it. Thanks.

Posted by: Sean at February 26, 2010 11:24 AM

Just get any old director from CSI: Miami. Someone well versed in WAY TOO MUCH ORANGE.

Posted by: Optimus Rhyme at February 26, 2010 12:08 PM

I recommend bar stool and bat, boys.

Posted by: Melody at February 26, 2010 12:23 PM

Transsiberian and Wolf Creek were actually both pretty good. ("In my opinion," it goes without saying.)

Posted by: MM at February 26, 2010 12:41 PM

I recommend picking up some of the Geoff Johns run of the Flash Dustin, it is really, really good stuff. Might maybe change your view on the matter?

Posted by: Ken Hart at February 26, 2010 1:59 PM

Much like my hope that the script for Green Lantern borrows from something involving Geoff Johns' very well done stint on the GL comic series; it is my fondest hope that they do so with the Flash. Johns turned Flash's Rogues into a force to be reckoned with. They may have stupid names and ridiculous costumes, but they were some bad sumbitches when he was writing for them. And of the four flashes, Wally was always my favorite.

Posted by: protoformX at February 26, 2010 7:57 PM

Seeking the successful singles and take care of you - perhaps financially? http://euageless.com/ celebrates age gap dating and romance.

Posted by: Jim at February 28, 2010 9:48 PM