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October 10, 2008 |

By Dustin Rowles | Industry | October 10, 2008 |

Do you have any idea what a detriment it is to write for a geek-heavy film site and know so little about comic books? Some days, I do a little research. Other days, I wing/fake it, but today, I’m going to come right out and confess my ignorance on all three of the following items:

First, Josh Brolin, who should be given a gold medal for awesome, has been all but confirmed as the lead in Jonah Hex. I have no fucking idea what Jonah Hex is, though apparently he’s a gun-slinging space cowboy, which sounds a lot like Fillion in Firefly, except this guy is some sort of anti-hero. Brian Taylor (Crank) is attached to direct, which is OK by me.

Second, Ryan Gosling is apparently in the running to play The Green Lantern, which should not be confused with Seth Rogen’s Green Hornet. Actually, I have a passing familiarity with The Green Lantern from “Superfriends” and “The Justice League” growing up. He was the guy with the magic green ring, whose kryptonite was, like, the guy with the yellow ring, I think (and the Man with a Yellow Hat could smite that bitch). I could never figure out why The Green Lantern didn’t just give his ring to Aquaman, and then Aquaman could do stuff a lot cooler than swim. When they were handing out the super powers at the super-powers gettin’ place, I swear to God, Aquaman got royally fucked. Dude must have been, like, “Seriously? That Superman motherfucker can fly, Batman has nipples that can cut glass, Wonder Woman has an invisible goddamn jet, and I can swim. What thee fuck? So what? I get to take out all the criminals that Flipper doesn’t have time to get around to? Thanks a lot, asshole.”

Well, good for Gosling.

And finally, the new Autobot in the Transformers sequel has been revealed to be Skids. I have no fucking idea what that means (sounds like a kid who shits his pants) except that it’s a Chevy. But … yeah. I’m sure some of y’all “in the know” are clapping your goddamn hands or booing. Or just shrugging your shoulders.

Or, Things I'm Completely Ignorant About / Dustin Rowles

Industry | October 10, 2008 |

Dustin is the founder and co-owner of Pajiba. You may email him here or follow him on Twitter.

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