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September 3, 2008 |

By Dustin Rowles | Industry | September 3, 2008 |

gi-joe-movie-2009.jpgGreat news, folks! Now that your favorite director and mine, Guillermo Del Toro, has run off to direct a movie about little men with hairy feet, the poor guy has no time to direct the live-action Tarzan movie he was attached to. Boo, right?! Who doesn’t want to see a live-action Tarzan directed by … Del Toro? That has what the fuck written all over it, though I’d have been intensely curious to see how Del Toro worked in tons of clocks into the jungle.

Anyway, all is right in the world — or at least appropriate — because Stephen Sommers, who directed The Mummy and Van Helsing, has been properly attached. Shitty projects deserve shitty directors. Stephen Sommers, I’m guessing, will get around to Tarzan after he’s complete post-production on G.I. Joe. And I don’t care if Joseph Gordon-Levitt is in it or not, it’s gonna suck. The existence of Channing Tatum in it is all you need to know. And since it’s called The Rise of Cobra, it suggests, already, that there will be a sequel, so that we might see Cobra decline. Something to look forward to.

That's About Right / Dustin Rowles

Industry | September 3, 2008 |

Dustin is the founder and co-owner of Pajiba. You may email him here or follow him on Twitter.

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