December 8, 2008 | Comments ()

By Dustin Rowles | Trade News | December 8, 2008 |


The new theatrical trailer for the Friday the 13th trailer hit stores this week, and man o’ man, does it look like flaming monkey poo. It’s pretty much exactly what you’d expect from a Michael Bay remake, including a series of nobody actors, headlined by the dumb blonde dude from “Veronica Mars” (Ryan Hanson) and Jared Padalecki. The trailer, in fact, has a very brief snippet of Paddleass’s Southern drawl, which is less honey and more Aunt Jemima, which is to say: He may wet your panties, but he’ll soggy up your pancakes, too. Even more dispiriting about the trailer is the fact that it gives away at least part of most of the film’s death scenes, which is a shame considering that it’s the only goddamn reason to go see the movie.

The good news is that there’s not a single actor in the entire cast I wouldn’t enjoy watching take a machete to the side of the head.

vorhest.jpg
You're Doomed! You're all Doomed.

Jason Was My Son. Today is his Birthday. / Dustin Rowles

Trade News | December 8, 2008 | Comments ()



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